What’s in a name?

Robert'); DROP TABLE Students;--

https://xkcd.com/327/

Good ol' Bobby Tables
Thank you! I was getting worried.
Came here looking for Little Bobby Tables with the link loaded up in my clipboard!

Yes, I'll name my child parent. This will reverse the tree, vertically.

It's Sims 2 all over again.
And if they settle on they/them pronouns, you could have an inverted non-binary tree.
It's like naming your dog 'Cat'.

What about Alice, Bob, and Eve?

They're currently shaking hands and too busy to let us borrow their names
- Even if they weren't you wouldn't be able to contact them directly, nowadays they have s man in the middle who handles their communications. badum tss

I love you so much NullPointerException

Oh no, we’ve lost NaN again!
"don't throw your child please." "Why? What's wrong with it?"

fun fact elif is a legit girl name in Turkish

My grandma watches this
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt4745726/
- don't even know what this is but I have been abroad since maybe 2010 so not suprised
- Lol, my mother used to watch it too

"Pointer, where are you?" Points at Parent, my other child

Pointer, where is This, your other sibling?
- They’re with Self and Construct.
Pointer moved to Hollywood, to become a character star. They had a string of interviews, but it ended in nothing.

Why no Ada or Janet? Or Haskell or Idris?

Ada is in fact named after a person, thus completing the circle.
- So are Haskell and Idris (well, if you consider a singing dragon as a person).

Elif is a feminine Turkish name :)

You know, OOP in Spanish translates as "Programación orientada a objetos" or POO in case you need it

Same in French which is ofc very similar to Spanish: programmation orientée objet

"Yo shut the fuck up Linked list, you're annoying as hell"

Little baby FORTRAN

A friend of mine named his dog Byte. The dog is very playful, and has the habit of running in the direction of other people he meets.

When the dog does that my friend tries to call him back shouting: "BYTE!! BYTE!!". People get really scared when this happens 😂

Okay, not so funny if you are the one being approached by the dog.

That's probably a little unethical but the mental image is absolutely hilarious.

Meet my kids, Sed and Awk.

And my dog, Cat.
What about grep and ack?
- Those are our names. My parents were Less and More.

"child" seems to be enough. short and concise.

“Slave” works too.
child-1 just in case
- Yeah leave em wondering what happened to child-0
- Error in line 1: You can't use a reserved symbol in a variable name.

Definitely naming my next dog Byte.

Edit: Petabyte!

Ah yes Julia, an unreasonably effective name to give your child

How could they forget Pascal :/

This reminded me I haven't heard from my uncle Foo Bar in a while. (He spells it Fubar)

Ain't that the right way to spell it?
- I think either way is perfectly acceptable. He just prefers Fubar and who am I to argue?

Just name the kid Basic, hardly worse than the Trahgedhieghs running around today

But what if they write sins instead?

Just name your child Linus like we all do...

His middle names are Tech and Tips, his nickname is Torvalds

As a Python programmer I'll have to name my child Dictionary, of course.

"My ordered set of kids? Wouldn't change them for anything. They're tuple-lets!"
Dic for short

Zig missing from the list is sad for very old meme reasons, too.

In A.D. 2001
Memes were beginning
omg the newgrounds site still loads?!
- of course!
What you say?
- You are on your way to destruction make your time!
For great justice
Clearly they took off every Zig.
Thank you for that. I was young once 😭
- My wife and I are the same age but I started using the internet around 1999 whereas she didn't use it until many, many years later.
  It's fun because I can show her old memes for the first time. She missed the entire "lol so random" era of internet memes (think things like badger badger badger, "my spoon is too big", forehead shavecut, animutations, etc) and doesn't quite understand it. It's all we had back then!

Oh yes, OOP, the namest of names

Oop

I'm naming mine 1337Code jr

For some reason I got an out of bounds memory exception when trying to dereference the parent.
Kind of has the same cadence to it as James Bond Jr. I like it.

Nothing beats Bobby Tables.

I'm naming my mid Iron Python and there's nothing you can do to stop me.

Oh wow is that still a thing?
- no idea, but the name is excellent.

Eula.

I like "Vectoria".

Lua

Lua-Nil

Haskell? Curry? Maybe even Brooks.

Haskell is an awesome name for a baby
- Oberon and Pascal, too. Or TurboPascal if you want to go the extra mile.
Monad
Functor
Lambda
Pure
Lisp
Recur
Arity
Memo
Transduce
Lein
Cabal
Akka
Eval
Don't forget Elm!

Naming ~~things~~ kids is the hardest part of programming.

Just put them in an unnamed array 'kids' and start with 0.

Fork

Actually considering that for my first-compiled

My favorite IT based names and the reason why I want two kids: Master and slave

This reminds me of an article I read about a guy whose last name was Null.

This isn't it but is the first one I found when looking.

https://www.wired.com/2015/11/null/

The story is pretty much what you would expect but still an amusing read.

Error also has a nice ring to it

Obligatory:
- I'm surprised this isn't memed more. Like, it's canon that there's a guy named Error running around in Hyrule and everyone has forgotten this.

Shhhh. My spouse hasn't caught on, yet.

goto

Don't give elon any ideas.

My first kitten was called Rails, but be run away. The second one, Ruby, but she died from sickness the second day we had her home. The third one was Rails 2, but we called him just Rails, he's 10 yo now. The fourth one wad called PowerBI, buy ny wife didn't like and it was a lame name anyway so we changed it to Sushi.