Fox News weirdo talks about the unmanly way to drink a milkshake

I bet women don't cover their drinks when Walz walks into the room.

See? Weird. All the women do that when I walk in the room. Also I slashed my wife's tires to get her to date me.
I'm Jesse Watters.
- For those who don't know, the tire slashing thing is true. And he admitted it on national TV before ever telling her in person.
I bet women don't cover their drinks when ~~Walz walks~~ Tim Waltzes into the room
I can't believe you just left that perfect opportunity sitting by the wayside!

Fellas is it gay to drink a milkshake with a straw?

Seriously though, how else are you meant to drink one??

You open your manly man gullet and pour the entire thing in. Or you shotgun it. Those are the only manly ways to consume beverages.
- You can boof it like Kavanagh too.
- Men can't savor their milkshakes. Drink it in 3 gulps, or you may as well just cut your balls off right there.
Keg Stand! Drink it pledge!
you're supposed to rip the cup open and scoop it out with your hands
- If you're not shotgunning your milkshakes are you even drinking them?
- Slow down there, Ron.
Obviously your supposed to tongue it out of a man’s ass
- Ngl that sounds kinda gay.
https://media.tenor.com/5xqFHi0bcTAAAAAM/homelander-milk.gif
You let it melt, go to the drive-thru liquor and get a half pint of Jim beam, and mix em while getting on the freeway in your dually F-250 which you’re using to haul 3 cases of bottle water back to the subdivision from Sam’s Club.
I think you're supposed to squint with one eye, scream "ACK ACK ACK" as you crush the cup from all sides with your hand, and then catch the plug of shake-goo in your mouth.
I would love it if this nimrod had to drink a shake on screen right after this inane comment.
Maybe with a spoon? I could imagine drinking it like a fully liquid drink, but that sounds like it would get pretty messy pretty quickly, like when a cup of ice spills onto your face.

That weirdo is... grasping at straws

I thought these weirdos were pro-straws? Something about how putting more plastic in the ocean is actually good for the environment and how bans on plastic straws are a slippery slope to woke Marxist communism or something?

That's on Tuesdays. On Thursdays straws are bad because man stuff. Keep up!
- Thanks Regina George

This is not the first time Watters has talked about straw use on air. His implication is that straws are somehow phallic and a man using one is gay. Watters’ strange obsession tells us more about his own phallus than anything else.

I really want to see him drink a milkshake now.

Who the fuck does not use straws in milkshakes? They're literally served with a straw by default because that's how you're supposed to drink them.

And this dumbass knows Tim Walz is married and has kids, right? While he got divorced for being a lousy cheater - which tells you everything.

Trump reportedly got bored during one of his first classified briefings on Afghanistan and ordered milkshakes in the middle of it
- to be "fair", while he went softer on him, waters still said this wasn't a good look. so at least he's consistent in his weirdness. can't imagine how embarrassed his poor mother must be.
- le sigh
A lot of conservatives seem to think of cheating as more manly than happy and stable familial relationships. Which is just further evidence that the people who are obsessed with men being manly have such a worse opinion of men and masculinity than the most rabid feminist stereotype

Straws are gay now? Does this guy just chug it?

Men can't have bananas, popsicles, corn dogs, hot dogs, fruity drinks, sugary coffee, and ice cream, and now they can't use straws?

and now they can’t use straws?
How TF are you supposed to drink a boba tea? Just take all the balls into your mouth at one time?
- you think having balls in your mouth isn't gay?
- like soup I guess
Men can't have bananas, popsicles, corn dogs, hot dogs, fruity drinks, sugary coffee, and ice cream, and now they can't use straws?
Real men can.
Nope, masculinity is too fragile apparently.
I saw a man once eat a banana in a completely non-gay way.
He opened his banana from a seam in the middle of the banana most of the way to the top and bottom, then ate the banana like a pussy.
Strangest method I've seen.
- That man must be crazy strong and intimidating for no one in his life to have ever felt safe enough to pull him aside and ask, "What the absolute fuck are you doing?"

What are you supposed to use? A spoon? Has this weird fascist ever been to a fast food drive thru?

You're supposed to dislocate your jaw like a snake and pour it down your throat in one big lump like that beer bong you sucked down back when you peaked in your frat days.
- Now I'm picturing someone doing that, then when they finish, going on a Brett Kavanaugh "I like beer!" style rant but about milkshakes

This obsession with being ‘manly’ is the least manly thing I can think of. How am I supposed to take you seriously when you’re a whiny little bitch about things like straws?

Exactly, as a man the only thing I care about in regards to milkshake-manliness is if there's whipped cream and a cherry on top! If the waitress forgot it, that means she doesn't respect you and you need to keep ordering until she sees how much lactose you're able to handle as a master of your domain! If you shit yourself, just make sure to tip extra...

Uh, I'm a woman and I like Tim Walz and think Jesse Watters should be thrown into an active volcano, so I'm not sure where he's getting his info from.

He seems good looking enough for a man his age, he's a nice guy, and suggesting a fucking football coach- oh, excuse me, assistant football coach isn't manly is just ludicrous on the outset.
Let's see Jesse Watters assistant coach a high school football game.
- The thing that draws me to him is the he seems like the kind of person who actually got in to politics because he wanted to help people, and he didn't become cynical and give up when he figured out all the roadblocks that are in the way of that goal. He seems like he still genuinely cares about people and wants everyone to have a better life, not just a small in-group.
- Oh, I read as “suggest fucking a football coach”

The young men go unseen. They run through the streets screaming "SEE ME! GAZE UPON MY VISAGE AND KNOW FEAR!" The young men shovel vanilla ice cream shakes into their contorted faces and gurgle in triumph. They do not use straws.

It is so incredibly strange to me that this bullshit can legally pretend to be a news channel, and many people watch it as such.

It's difficult to believe that people are that stupid, seriously.

Thanks Reagan.

A straw? A s-t-r-a-w??? A fucking STRAW??? How very dare he drink a milkshake like a normal Human. How dare he! Bastard!

Young men "Don't Feel Seen" By the Democrats

But we at fox news do see them and make sure at every opportunity to make them feel shame and guilt for not reaching the level of masculinity that we define (and change) on a frequent basis.

Fr. There may even be something to dems not offering much to young men, but the right only pretends to while actively working against us.

Always wanted to drag one of these guys onto a construction site and watch them die in 10mins of exhaustion...fucking unmanly lol what an idiot

You know that dude would be completely useless.
- I picture him staring confusedly at a claw hammer because he doesn't know which side to use.

This is from that shitty movie with Ryan Gosling, right? Where he tells Steve Carrell not to use a straw because it's like sucking a cock or something.

I like how he is trying to describe masculinity, being a person who wears on makeup for his/her/them job.

And with a unisex name.

“I saw Tim Walz sneeze. What kind of man does that?”

fellas, is it gay to drink from a straw?

fellas, is it gay to consume ice cream with a spoon?

fellas, is it gay to consume ice cream with your bare hands?

I have lots of gay friends, and they all like ice cream. So that should tell you something.
- you make a good point. How can we know that ice cream doesn't make people gay?

There are so many ways to respond to this stupidity, but I think it boils down to not celebrating being an asshole.

Being an asshole is not manly.

Being an asshole is not strong.

Being an asshole is not being a leader.

Hating everything and everyone does not mean you have elite tastes and are above it all.

And going back to manliness, such concern over it and the superficial “virtue” signaling of it with drinks, clothes, trucks, and tacticool punisher skull caliber stuff is the least manly shit I can imagine. How can you even take yourself seriously when you’re a fragile walking cliche?

I hate the whole x is manly/masculine crap.

Most of the time it's just glorifying highschool jock behavior. Some stereotype of an alpha chad with their "masculinity" dialed up to toxic.

I'm a dude and you know what I think is manly/masculine? Being a good person, paying bills, working and earning money for your family, being a good parent to your kids, taking responsibility when you make a mistake and trying to fix it, respecting people property, boundaries, rights, and freedoms. Generally being helpful, productive, and kind.

Otherwise known as being a productive member of society.

You can be deficient in some of these areas too, like earning money to support your family, maybe your spouse is the breadwinner and you're the stay-at-home parent. That's good too. If you don't have offspring, then we can waive the parenting stuff. Etc.

And these things don't just apply to men, they can all be applied to women too, because being manly to me, is more about being a good human.

Anyone pushing a different narrative, to me, is someone pushing for people to be garbage.

I don't care what you have between your legs, or whether you have kids or not, or whether those kids are your biological offspring or not. I don't care what color you are, where you come from, who you love, what your job is, how much you make, what diplomas or degrees you have, or what God you may, or may not believe in.

Be kind to eachother. Support your friends and family. Be a productive member of society. Be a good human.

It's all about defining the "in-group" to exclude people they don't like. It starts with not liking the person, then looking for a behaviour they can call "not masculine/feminine" because the worst thing you can be is not representative of your gender.
No one has ever said that drinking a milkshake with a straw is unmanly. But Tim Walz did it, and we don't like Tim Walz, and if the out-group does it then it must be bad.
This is also why calling them "weird" bothers them so much. "Weird" means you're part of the out-group. However, the average person doesn't exist, everyone has something they do that the average person doesn't. You tell a person without an in-group out-group obsession that something they do is "weird" and they won't care and continue enjoying their life. Someone who is obsessed with being part of the in-group will feel ashamed about not being average and try to hide it. It's an impossible standard they expect out of themselves and everyone around them.
Also, isn't obsessing over how a man drinks his milkshake with a straw kind of weird?
- The weirdest thing of all is even if you buy into the bullshit, what is it that trump does that's traditionally manly? I can't think of a single "manly" thing associated with him.

i am sorry to report that i tried to click the play button

Trust me, you're better off not having to listen.
- thank you for sparing me
That tells you everything you need to know

Its both hilarious and pathetic how desperate these idiots are to land any sort of negative narrative.

That’s a thick ass milk shake, and you’d look like a fucking weirdo drinking that without a straw.
This host is too insure to walk around with vanilla shake. What a wuss. Vanilla is delicious.

For Jesse, the most manly way to have a vanilla creme milkshake is up your ass with an enema. Nothing says "I'm a man's man that getting cream-pie'd with a large load".

Is it getting warm in here?

They covered this on Seth Meyer's a closer look and then showed a photo of drumpf and Bill O'Reilly at a baseball game, both drinking vanilla milkshakes with straws. Marvelous.

Wait hold on, isn't this straight up exactly something Goebbels spat out in his propaganda campaigns?

Like they're literally just replaying 1930s Germany at this point. Not even trying something original

Ah yes, the milkshake-mustache. So manly, very hot.

Tells you everything https://www.nydailynews.com/2016/01/28/bill-oreilly-and-donald-trump-really-do-love-vanilla-milkshakes-and-daily-news-has-proof/

So more projection?
Its incredible how accurately you can predict projections with the GOP
What a complete girl.

What do ya know, another innocuous thing that makes Fox News personalities think about gay sex.

This is pathetic

I don't parlez-vouz NONE OF THAT SHIT

This weird ass Fox host probably suckles Slurpee lids like a teat because using a straw makes him feel insecure.

I'm confused, how do you y'all drink a milkshake? I suck it up through a straw like a normal person. Trying to give myself an aneurysm and pull my asshole through my throat. You know, like a normal soy boy American.

this guy has the weirdest takes.

We don't need parodies because they do it better themselves.

I am gonna take a moment to rant about Cook Out's "shakes". They are NOT milkshakes! They are just soft serve blended with your requested add-ons.

They give you a straw but you can't even use it because the ice cream is too thick.

If you want a milkshake you can drink with a straw go to Dairy Queen.

I wanna see this Fox News asshole drink a milkshake for 5 minutes on air.

No straw. No pause. As fast as you can. Brainfreeze isnt real, its just another woke mindvirus keyword meant to steal your cum or smn

The Republicans’ secret weapon: the irresistible hypermasculine testosteronal musk emanating from Vance that will, on a deeply primal level, force the ladies to forget about all that “feminism” stuff and vote for him in droves

That guy looks like he would smell like too much Axe body spray.

Watters has always gone so beyond the pale I am sure his stuff is all an over the top act that he is being paid for. I wouldn't be surprised if one day it comes out that he got rich AND was funneling dark money to the Democrats at the same time.

Forgoing straws for the environment is woke, but using a stray is gay.

Taking some actions and not taking other actions exclusively because of whether other people will perceive them as manly is extremely non-manly. If you have to live someone else's life because you worry that others will look down on you in some slight way for living your own...

That tells you everything.

Ok, so carried to it's logical conclusion, he's suggesting that sucking dick is unmanly.

So there's definitely nothing manly about this chap then: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jack_Radcliffe

Years active 1989-2008.
Short of maybe Ron Jeremy, that has to be some kind of record for a pornstar.
If it had been a choclate shake...

"Real men don't use straws" being played over "I just want to feel seen by Democrats" is giving me mixed messages on how to manly.

"Young men don't feel seen by the Democratic party"

WTF, what a dumb news chiron.

What's their source? john-travolta-looking-around.gif
"The Democrats" sounds worse than "the Democratic party." Isn't putting "the" in front of a label just a way to "other" them? When I see people say something about, for example, "the Jews," it's usually something bad, as opposed to when they say "Jewish people."

The person is worried about masculinity has a girl's name.

It was mint chocolate chip from a Cookout in Raleigh NC to be exact...

Real men only drink Sweet baby rays BBQ sauce flavored milkshakes, with broken glass instead of crushed ice, and from an automotive oil drain pan.

And when they drink straight from cup, the milkshake slides out in one big clump and it looks like they were center stage in a bukkake show. Now you tell me which looks more gay?

For Christ sakes, fuckers it’s a damn straw. Sticking a tube in your mouth doesn’t make you gay. Eating a banana doesn’t make you gay. Sticking a dick in your mouth does. Well unless he paid you $20. Then it’s just business.