Therapy
Therapy
Therapy
OR, they’ve already been through therapy and found some decent medication, and are keenly aware that personally enjoyable hobbies are an essential part of self care.
Not that I know anything about that.
Why would someone assume these people needed therapy in the first place?
The vast, vast majority of men (in the US, can't speak to other cultures) need therapy. Just getting over internalized phobias is something the entire culture needs. Really, everyone needs therapy at some point and very few have a chance to get it, and fewer take it.
But in regards to this meme: men tend to need therapy more. The patriarchy (what society pushes as male "culture") heavily represses emotional expressions and few men have an outlet to talk to their friends or family about their feelings. This leads to a lot of repressed emotions, lashing out, etc.
These guys are not lashing out, though. There is no discernable connection between somebody taking an interest in trains and avoiding therapy lol
Really, everyone needs therapy at some point
What we need is a society and environment that aligns with human nature.
Yes, I'm in therapy and I take meds. But I sure as fuck didn't need any therapy and meds during the 6 months I worked as a hiking and horseback riding guide in a Provincial Park in British Columbia.
i think it's less that men need therapy, though older men, particularly those above 30 probably do, the problem with young men right now is not therapy, it's a lack of societal engagement from them, presumably because society doesn't really know what to do with them, or doesn't really understand how to deal with shifting tides.
As a mental health worker, if a client got involved with something like this, I'd be thrilled. This sounds like it provides purpose and community to all involved. Good for them!
I actually agree with you in many aspects. Something new that is being taught in therapy training is that we have to be aware of systemic issues that are contributing to someone's mental health.
Example: someone is suicidal and feeling hopeless. Do they have clinical major depressive disorder? Maybe, but if we ask "how are your finances doing?" And they say they work full time at Walmart and get paid $10 per hour and have 3 kids... Yeah it makes sense why they feel helpless and suicidal.
For this reason, therapists and mental health workers have a duty to advocate for progressive social policies.
It would be like if were constantly maiming and injuring people and saying the problem was not enough people going to physical therapy.
In that I kind of agree with you. Many problems can be traced back to societal issues. Hell is other people. That's why we need to do better.
Sending those, damaged by society, to therapy is necessary, but we wouldn't be there if several root causes wouldn't exist.
Like if we just took blackrock's real estate and put homeless people in it the mental health crisis would just be like 80% solved. I'm not even kidding.
Oversimplification, imo. But this is surely a contributing factor.
In one of my psych courses the professor noted a study (not sure of the source, this was closing in on twenty years ago now) that while psychotherapy had pretty good efficacy for certain things, it was equivalent with "talk openly with your friends about it" in most metrics. A therapist is great for providing specific strategies to address particular challenges (for issues like PTSD, for example, a therapist can help to manage an exposure therapy approach) but after a point you're kinda just paying through the nose for somebody to professionally emulate you having a healthy friendship with a well-adjusted person.
That is therapy
Doing something you enjoy ✅
Doing something with a community ✅
Doing something different to your normal routine ✅
No offense to you, but I definitely don't think this will address quite a few things that therapy can.
If all you are suffering from is a lack of direction in life, then this absolutely will help. You could even see improvements in social anxiety and social aptitude.
Anger problems, though? Alexithymia? Chronic episodes of mental dissociation? I don't think working on the train crew's gonna help
At the same time, It's definitely been conjected that therapy is mostly woman-focused and isn't as effective for men for various reasons. That kind of lines up with a few of my previous therapists, who felt like worthless experiences for me. I have heard of some new therapy styles implemented in certain places, though, that do sound to be genuinely helpful to dudes.
Edit: "social anxiety and social anxiety" woops
You make a decent point and illustrate by your "woman-focused" that there is a decided lack of professional therapists geared to male issues. This is why we have learned to find inner peace through creative activities. It lets us focus on the task instead of stewing on things over which we have little if any effect or control
I've witnessed these old boys hanging out tinkering and chatting. The best kind of therapy.
That is a hobby. A lovely one, but still a hobby. That is not therapy.
I'm not saying you can't gain insights into yourself or situations while doing that. It can most definitely help and be therapeutic. But therapy it is not
SO FUCKING WHAT?!?!? DO I NEED TO ASK PERMISSION TO HAVE A FUCKING HOBBY, YOUR MAJESTY??? JESUS CHRIST!!! (smashing noises and incoherent yelling from garage)
People will bitch about anything someone else does that is therapeutic for them.
Learning to not do this was an important part of my mental health journey. I’ve come to realize I was raised by some very negative people. Very nice people that I see regularly, but always looking for something to complain about rather than something to appreciate.
I understand this to some extent. I however wasn't raised by nice people. When I cut contact with them I got better and discovered I didn't have to like something someone else did for it to be good for them.
Having a hobby and being part of a community is a very constructive, helpful, and effective way of beating back the isolation and despair that is killing so many young people.
fuck you, coal fired steam boilers, and steam engines are one of the coolest, and most technologically impressive things we have ever done throughout history. Only topped by the deep space probes currently hurtling to the middle of nowhere spaceland.
IDK, you hear about sliced bread? It's pretty nice.
slice bread is also pretty good. But that's nothing compared to what a steam engine can do given a bread slicer.
Presliced bread goes bad quicker and I also prefer a different slice thickness than what is usually offered. I don’t understand why it’s seen as such an achievement.
Nope. Good bread basically never comes in slices, and definitely not in the country that invented pre-sliced bread. You can get passable sliced bread in Germany but the good stuff definitely stays loaves at least until you buy it. I mean it's fine to slice it then and there if you have enough mouths to feed to have it finished by tomorrow.
Have You heard about portable outhouses? God's gift to humanity!
I used to bring up that Diane Feinstein was older than sliced bread to point out her age... but now it's hard to say she is older. Need a new politician to rag on.
that and hit or miss engines
idk man, i hate combustion based engines. They're cringe and unfunny.
Who says instead? Seems like people with their heads on right
Sorry, they can't hear you over all the CHOOO CHOOOO MOTHERFUCKEEEEEERRRR!!!
CRANKIN STEAMY HOGS WITH THE PACK
I think that's pretty cool, seems like a net positive for everyone, guy loves trains..guy fixes train...shares passion with community...more people love train. He wins, train wins, community wins.
No one wants to work, which is clearly a human trait despite the fact we do work like this constantly, across the board, for fun
Yeah, if I didn't have to spend time on a job, I'd spend some of that free time volunteering with habitat for humanity to build houses. I love doing that kind of shit.
What a weird fuckin take
Yeah, like you could say the exact same thing about gardening or painting or knitting. Taking up a hobby and learning how to do something can be really relaxing and beneficial to your mental health. Gender has nothing to do with it.
It is what it is
Is this a reference from another post today?
YOLO
I'd take that post over the bear.
It also preserves History.
This format seems to always frame therapy as shitty, and the other thing as actually really cool, if complicated.
I doubt it's intentional, but seems anti men's mental health. And honestly, that situation is so fucked up beyond measure, that micro-aggressions like this meme format is really hurting the cause. My two cents.
Funny meme though.
Someone else here linked to knowyourmeme.
Most of them are glaringly obvious, some are meta. This one though can easily come across as "stuff closeted misandrists say to get a pat on the back" if you don't know the format. Flanked by a good dose of nerd shaming.
I mean it's true, men will literally comment on the internet before going to therapy. We will also literally tie our shoelaces before going to therapy.
You know what, this is a good thing. This time actually reading the knowyourmeme article, they're a parody reaction thing. Some 20, 30 years ago a new pattern of insult cropped up here in Germany, things like Warmduscher and Schattenparker, "someone who takes warm showers", "someone who parks in the shadow". They were never meant literally-literally, but they did come up with a definite air of "you should be toughing it out", "being a bit sensitive about things aren't we". They were quickly balanced out by things like Drahtseilbungeespringer, roughly "steel cable bungee jumper".
Humour is serious business and usually the best weapon against shittiness we have, and if occasionally we have things that can be misinterpreted, like here, overall it's still worth it.
Everyone who does thing different from me literally has the emotional maturity of a toddler.
– A Toddler, 2024
I make off decently with how much my company pays for insurance. Would I rather have full universal health care though? You bet your ass
I'm not following. Why is it being assumed this is to avoid therapy, and not just people doing an activity for fun?
Because man bad/woman bad
It's a meme, guys.
And get more out of it too
Just gonna link this, for the oblivious among us: https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/instead-of-going-to-therapy
I ride my bike. It's great for just switching off. The weather is normally pretty awful where I am but in the sun in the summer it's amazing.
Hang on I'm going to need some help here I appear to have got myself into a logical loop.
I'm not depressed so I can't play with trains but now I'm sad that I can't play with trains. So I can play with trains? But now I'm not depressed anymore. So I guess I have to stop? Which makes me sad.
Sounds like a form of therapy in and of itself.
Sharing your enjoyment with others. Work you can take pride in. Preserving history. Sounds pretty great for mental health.
And probably cheaper.
I can guarantee it’s not cheaper
steam equipment is definitely not cheaper than therapy, you get a cracked cylinder? Better hope you have literal tons of iron/steel sitting around, and or something/someone to pay for it, as well as someone to machine it, because none of that exists anymore.
Yeah, I was gonna say that these men DID go to therapy.
That was my thought.
Men got themselves a hobby they enjoy, and gets to share with others. Two amazing things for someones overall mental health. Sounds like someone living the dream.
Yeah, most people today meed therapy because they feel isolated from their work, unappreciated, and are stressed about finances. A hobby where you work towards a common goal with no real world consequences is what most people need in their life right now. ~~~~
https://mensshed.org/
Honestly, if you think about it, therapy did kind of replace the support structures formed in tight knit communities...