River River

Fun fact: copper got its roman name because the main exporter of that good in ye classic times was the island of Cyprus (Kyprus, cuprum)

Yer da sells Avon.

Fun fact: Celts were originally central European, but the British Isles and Brittany were the only places Celtic culture survived the Romans.

that's not fun, that's horrifying
- Some Celts drowned when doggerland became dogger island then dogger bank as the glaciers retreated. The sea flooding all the land must have been a surprise for them, no high land was high enough

Naming my main character "Alexander" and every time I visit a city I tell the DM to refer to it as "Alexandria" going forward.

There is an urban legend that when the Swedish map makers came to Finland the locals would mess with them when asked what a pace was called and that is why so many place names have “vittu” or “perse” etc. in them.

People naming things in Australia:

Townsville
Western Australia
Shark bay
Great Sandy Desert
Little Sandy Desert
Snowy Mountains

But you also have wildcards:

Tasmania (not actually a mental illness)
Monkey Mia (There are no monkeys, and nobody named Mia)
Lake disappointment (contains no water)
Blue mountains (they are mostly green)
King Island (we don't recognise its claim to the throne)

Tbf the blue mountains are blue from the right distance in the right weather, like most temperate Australian mountains
Lake disappointment (contains no water)
I don't know, that sounds like a pretty accurate name for a lake without water
Shark bay
Great Sandy Desert
Little Sandy Desert
Snowy Mountains
Lol these sound like Super Mario Bros levels
- They'd probably go with Sandy Sandy Desert.
Didn't you cunts also name a swimming pool after your prime minister who died swimming in the ocean?
- We did indeed. The Harold Holt memorial pool
Lake disappointment (contains no water)
Well, that would be very disappointing if your lake had no water. So I think they nailed that one.
The Powerpuff Girls happened in Australia‽‽
- The city of Townsville, yes (it is in fact a city)
- TIL Powerpuff girls is set in a place called Townsville
What's wrong with Shark Bay? I'd name every second bay I find, Shark Bay.
- Greater shark Bay
  Lesser shark Bay
  Disappointment shark Bay ( no sharks)

Fantasy world names: scadrial, Pallimustus, Vulcan, Tatoine

Real planet names by locals: Dirt

It was called "Earth" because we needed to distinguish it from Sky and Water, which were totally different things.

Reminds of the old story that I heard (unsure if it's true or not) about Torpenhow Hill in the UK.

Over centuries... various invaders and conquerors had come to that place and asked what it was called... First it was called Tor later on invaders added the word 'Pen' which was their word for Hill... later, more invaders came along and added the suffix 'How' which was their word for Hill.... and finally... it was named in more modern English as Torpenhow Hill.... which literally translates as Hill, Hill, Hill, Hill.

I don;t know if that's 100% true or not... but it's an amusing little story and given the oddities of the English language... I'd like to think it was.

Especially given there's a species of bear out there that's name is literally translated as Bear, Bear, Bear.

From the Wikipedia page:
A. D. Mills in his Dictionary of English Place-Names interprets the name as "Ridge of the hill with a rocky peak", giving its etymology as Old English torr, Celtic *penn, and Old English hoh, each of which mean 'hill'. Thus, the name Torpenhow Hill could be interpreted as 'hill-hill-hill Hill'.
I think it's a hill?
Unfortunately, Tom Scott has already debunked this
Guys I think that place might be on some elevated terrain
It’s kind of true. The last hill seems to be a modern invention, and Torpenhow Hill isn’t listed on any maps. There is a village there called Torpenhow, though, and that is Hillhillhill

Reminds me of

Torpenhow Hill is a hill in Cumbria, England. Its name consists of the Old English ‘Tor’, the Welsh ‘Pen’, and the Danish ‘How’ - all of which translate to modern English as ‘Hill’. Therefore, Torpenhow Hill would translate as hill-hill-hill hill

Here is a Tom Scott video about it:
https://youtu.be/NUyXiiIGDTo
\ https://invidious.f5.si/watch?v=NUyXiiIGDTo
I believe there's also a Haversham Hill, which is also a hill hill hill hill

In my group if the GM can't pronounce the name in one try in a way that makes it clear to us how to spell it the players with rename it something more like "Bonertown" or just "Dave"

Fun fact in hungary there are no two towns with the same name. Or at least thats what everyone seems to say and to be fair i havent found a single pair yet so im pretty sure its true. Quite a neat thing actually, if you tell the name of even a small town to someone, they should be able to find it. And because hungarian has its unique characters and structures its quite likely that its the only place on earth named that.

My d&d game tends to work better when I just name things like “The Nightmare Wood” and “The Old Hills”. The simplicity somehow lands harder.

My friends don't know anything about my hometown, so I just name everything after old street names or old parts of town.
Cabbageford
Countsclearing
Blackstakes
Turnpike
Holyspring
Stepsstream
Canyard
Cattlestream Valley
On The Height
Cottageville
Stalkpond
Firecreek
Meadowsmill
Sticks
Bogbrook
Bogbridge
Kingsroad
Goldenworth
It feels incredibly realistic, because it is.
Sometimes name it after a person, or some shit that went down there, especially if its not someplace important. Like its not the nightmare town, there's nothing particular about it. So it's susanstown, and attempts to discover local lore would find stories about the ancient founder that have been embellished over the years.
- or invert it.. Nightmare Town is named because the founder had a nightmare the first night after establishing camp there, and nothing else. Susan's Hamlet, though had some real fucked up shit happen, is actively haunted and is the birthplace of the BBEG.
- Derekshithispantsthereville
Sounds like you are describing Palpatine's dick.

If only I had the self-confidence of the guy who went to Australia and said "this place is called New South Wales now."

Pffft, he was plagued with self doubt compared to Cecil Rhodes who went to Africa and said "this place is called Rhodesia now."
Well I mean randy feltface had a good bit on naming in Australia https://youtube.com/shorts/rvDzyPUBJUU
Not sure I’d buy a house in stabbyville
I always wanted to be a fly on the wall when they named the colony (later state) of Virginia.
"We should name this place after Queen Elizabeth."
\ "Excellent idea, Elizabethia it is!"
\ "No, no. Virginia. 'Cause she's never... you know. Wink wink, nudge nudge."
- https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-15367555/nick-fuentes-virgin-piers-morgan-gay-rumors.html
  Apparently, some people like being called virgins
- Those are both from the same Mitchel and Webb sketch.
- She was called the Virgin Queen
Australia is also just called South. And apparently someone proposed the name Borealia (North) for Canada.
- Canada it is!
I sometimes wonder why that isnt just "New Wales". Is there something so distinct about the south of Wales that makes it be seen as something distinct to name something after?
- Yes, Wales is generally divided into North, Mid and South (and Corner, as in Cornwall).
  South Wales generally corresponds with the former Kingdom of Deheubarth. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deheubarth?wprov=sfla1
  Deheubarth was punished for rebelling against Engkand in 1282 by being divided into the three counties of South Wales. Referring to it as South Wales rather than south Wales is a miniature act of rebellion in itself; the Welsh government styles it capitalised to emphasise that historical distinction; the Britsh government uses lower case to erase the distinction.
- Filthy north welsherners. They think they're sumtin. Well they're NOT!
- Maybe topography, but almost certainly not weather, except for maybe 2 weeks in southern winter/northern summer where the temperature will directly align
Relevant Mitchell and Webb

Istanbul is literally "to the city" or in a way just "the city"

Beijing is "northern capital", Tokyo is "eastern capital", and Kyoto is "capital capital".
- "capital_capital_final_thistime.jpg"
  (Karl Marx's revision history)
Schenectady is "the place beyond the pines" because there was a big old pine barren between it and the next settlement over.
That's nobody's business but the Turks.
The Nullarbor plain sounds like an Aboriginal word, but it's just Latin and means "No trees" because there are no trees on it.

Oh and the Newtown.

I grew up in a village whose name roughly translates to "Bob's place by the stream."

I lived for a bit in a place that meant "Big nose".

According to USPS, there are 32 towns in the US named Franklin. lol

Honestly surprised it's that low
Lots of Bismark and Moscow about too.

Alaskan settlers wanted to call their new town Ptarmigan cause there were plenty of those birds around.
But they didn't know how to spell it, so they called it Chicken.

However, this is likely apocryphal, since it was popularized in the 1940s, almost 50 years after the town was founded. The most likely origin is from nearby Chicken Creek, as noted by Josiah Edward Spurr in 1896, “The creek is so named from the size of the gold, which is about that of chicken feed (corn).”

Not really true. (the Roman misunderstanding part)

To all the men obsessed with the Roman empire: you are to Republicans what the Greek culture is to Democrats. #generalization #butTrue

There is a Canada heritage minute about the last one

https://youtu.be/nfKr-D5VDBU