Probably: Ho Lee Fuk
I'm ethnic Chinese so that makes it even better
39 0 ReplyThe airline pilot?!?
17 0 ReplyYou may be thinking of Bam Ding Ow.
13 0 Reply
Dave.
No last name, just Dave.
28 0 ReplyThanks! I was just looking for this joke the other day
2 0 ReplyJoke Dave boss Pope 🤣 Hook hand man car door
1 0 Reply
I'd go with something that has a little more class than most of the suggestions here. Something with a certain ring to it. Like... Biggus Dickus
19 0 ReplyWhat's so funny about 'Biggus Dickus'?
I have a vewy gweat fwiend in Wome called 'Biggus Dickus'.
15 0 ReplyHe has a wife you know.
3 0 Reply
My last name is a gemstone that is already used by strippers/pornstars often so I would probably keep that as the second part of my name but come up with something funny and/or masculine sounding for the first part since I'm a straight guy and not a female stripper/porn star.
Fuck it ill go with Dick Diamond.
18 0 ReplyGives you a opportunity for great catch phrase:
"I'm as hard as a diamond" "Dont bite this diamond" "This diamond performs under intense heat and pressure"
12 0 ReplyI have used all of these and more accompanied by a goofy smirk. My girlfriends have not found it as funny as I have. Haha
8 0 Reply"Diamonds are forever" and "Diamonds are a woman's best friends" are interesting catch phrases too
6 0 Reply
Is this Jack Ruby's lemmy account?
1 0 Reply
Too Many Pancakes.
Because I'm fat but flat.
15 0 ReplyFair lmao
4 0 Reply
Chode Loadington
14 0 ReplyAnd I, Load Chodington, will be your arch nemesis and steal all your roles.
8 0 Reply
Ugot Badtaste
If you're watching me then you definitely do. Lol
11 0 ReplyAl Dente: the perfect balance between soft and hard.
10 0 ReplyRock Hardman
9 0 ReplyA Hideo Kojima inspired porno, no doubt.
8 0 Reply
Roy Mustang. Always thought that guy was wasting his time in the military with a name like that
9 0 ReplyI would go through LinkedIn and pick a person at random, use their name with the exact same spelling and any alphabet soup they have behind their name
Jerry Thompson, Esq Mary Kowalski, F.A.C.S. Dr. Alan Carter, DDS, FACP
These are all fake btw. I mean they may not be but if they are it’s genuinely a coincidence. That would be so weird
8 0 ReplyStandard rules. Middle name and the street you grew up on.
Alan Woodbine.
7 0 ReplyJared 832N County. Sexy
6 0 ReplyJohnson Street would be great for this… if I had one.
4 0 ReplyFrancisco 22...
2 0 Reply
Average Richard
7 0 ReplyNice Cockbra
6 0 ReplyHugh Jdisappointment
6 0 ReplyGeorge Washington Lemon Fresca
6 0 ReplyJon Reremy
6 0 ReplyGhonna Reah.
6 0 ReplyD O N G
6 0 ReplyThat One Guy.
"Ugh why is That One Guy suddenly in all the porn? He really ruins it!"
5 0 ReplyTwo-Tone Malone?
2 0 Reply
Diablito Diablo
5 0 Reply^
5 0 ReplyDragon Dong
5 0 ReplyDragon Ballz D
3 0 Reply
^
5 0 ReplyDru Peacock
5 0 ReplySilky Johnson
5 0 ReplyJasmine Mourningwood, and i would be a goth femboy, (so only a little change)
5 0 Replysecretlyaddictedtodick
4 0 ReplyCurly McDick
4 0 ReplyBusting balkaner
4 0 ReplyG Hitman
4 0 ReplyMickey Mouth
4 0 ReplyHuge Ackman
3 0 ReplyGregor Samson
3 0 ReplyA bit late to the party but: Barry McAuckner
3 0 ReplyBukkake Bill
3 0 ReplyId use my real first name but then disguise my identity by using johnson as a last name.
3 0 ReplyOne of my favorites: https://youtu.be/_m2X3uuayKg
3 0 Reply[Lester the Molester Cockenschtuff
Or maybe Pete Jonze ](https://clip.cafe/zack-miri-make-a-porno-2008/who-are-again-lester/)
3 0 ReplyRichard McGusherblaster
3 0 ReplyMaria End
2 0 ReplyDixon Cider
2 0 ReplyChadwick Cockburn
2 0 ReplyThe Simpson.
2 0 ReplyJim Rob
2 0 ReplyYerma Ther
2 0 Reply^^
2 0 ReplyThe Jimmy the Jizzler
2 0 Reply