Statistically, probably with the beetles. 🪲

At a table by myself, with everyone making fun of my laughably low number of legs

Covered in bees! Hopefully Eddie Izzard will show up and tell some jokes.

I'm staying out. At that size, many of those are just terrifying, even if they are cool when much smaller than me.

Spider gang, no doubt

On the floor

Bees, beetles and moths are fine (wasps are much less so btw), and spiders catch flies and mosquitoes, so yes them too.

Mantises. I love those things. We like to find them in the garden and sometimes pick them up and let them crawl all over us.

Moths. AKA goth butterflies.

Actually butterflies are moths
Not only that, the only thing that makes them spooky and startling is that they randomly fly around like a dumbass towards anything light related.
When they're just sitting still being chill they're actually quite adorable.
You mean glam butterflies

At one of the tables without giant bugs occupying all the seats

spiders 🤤

The moths. Most likely not to eat me.

If I can't get Absolute Radience in godhome a cafeteria will have to do.
The beetles and the bees won't eat you either. They can harm you in other ways though.

Moths!

Or maybe bees. I have always wanted to hug a bumblebee.

I have a decent relationship with mantids already. I'd sit with them.

Love how you snuck in the correction there. Classy 👌 Have my up vote. ❤️✌️

Bees. So long as I stay on their good side they're chill and they'll protect me from the other options that want to eat me.

Team arachnids!

Hell yeah!
No way. What's their name?
- My other T. vagans' ( same species) name is Garambullo, inspired by the very delicious fruit of this cactus. Kinda looks like the species signature red rump.
  But this one doesn't have a name... Any suggestions? It's a female but I'm sure she's fine with whatever XD.
- That's a she.
- Stephen

Bees because bees are usually pretty chill and I like chill. Especially the bumblebees.

Bees 100%

Everyone knows that anyone who knows anything about anything would go for the most evolutionary diverse group - spiders.

There is nothing these little guys can't do. Fly over hundreds of kilometres? You got it. Extend their nervous systems several thousand times past their body area using web? Check. Biological hydraulic system? Yup. Jump 10 to 50 times their body lenght? No problem. Live underwater using silk made diving suit? You bet your sweet behind. Paralyze your body after one bite? Easy.

Where's the wasp table!?

They are doing meth in the toilets

I will sit under the lightbulb and wait for the moths to join me.

...Right next to the oil furnace in the basement, trying to figure out how to rig it to blow and burn the place down.

Christian Slater calling any minute
Murder the bugs they deserve death!
- OK Hornet

At one of those empty tables

I wouldn’t dare to sit here as a human. I’m too big and would probably squish them all by accident.

But if I got to choose to be one, I’d go for the spiders. You get:

two extra legs over the rest
your own supply of crafting materials
lots of eyes
and a cozy place to relax in

Tangent, there is a fun fantasy book series by Adrian Tchaikovsky where all the main characters are humanoids with bug qualities. So basically spiderman, antman, mantisman, etc. It is entertaining when you mix fantasy tropes (dueling for honour!) with mantis arm spikes...

The Insect-kindens! And it is quite a lengthy series, at that, if anyone is looking for something new to get into (not to mention he actually finishes series, unlike another fantasy writer...)
Shadows of the Apt & Tales of the Apt
- I actually only read the first four. Felt like a natural stopping point there. Pretty cool series though :)
- My first thought was Patrick Rothfuss but I think you are referring to Martin. I'm sure the list is long of unfinished fantasy series, whichever book you are waiting for I hope your year is 2026!
Adrian Tchaikovsky also has the Children of Time series in which spiders are the main characters. A very fun read!

Idk, I feel like the colourful ones would group a bit differently.

The popular high-fashion ones (orchid mantis, jumping spider, rosy maple moth) would be at one table, goths (bumblebee, tarantula) at the other, jocks are already together (beetles, tho ladybug prob carries a knife), goodly two-shoes nerds (bees) also, other spiders are obv commuter nerds, ...

Anyway, I would skip lunch bcs this feels like a way too social situation.

I'd be at the oddball table with the roly poly, millipede & dragonfly...

Dragonflies are likely to be with the mantids at the "we will rip your head off if we like you, you don't want to know what we do to our enemies" table.
- I imagine dragonflies as the "enforcer nerd"; they hang with the weird kids as both companions and security.

Mantises. Fuck aphids

The moths table for the vibes, but the seat closest to the spiders to get in on their jokes.

Where's the lightning bug table?

Unless you are a piece of shit, because then the beetles will ragdoll roll you around until you are a nice sphere of shit.

(How do I plan such a funeral for myself?)

I would definitely want to be friends with the mantises in case they go postal one day

Mantises even eat their own partners. How safe do you think being friends with them will be?
- Listen, nobody knows what happened to Stacey's boyfriend's head, it's just an unsolved mystery, ok!!
  \ (Don't look in the lunch box.)
They definitely look the most stylish
Lol. We run on opposite wavelengths. If the mantises go postal I want to be as far away as possible.

As far away from the moths as possible. Too chaotic and irrational for me.

i think Id make a pretty moth :)

Mantises

I think I'd go with the moths. Least likely to kill me.

I would sit down at an empty table and it would turn out to be the Bees’

LÖMP!

I'm already sitting with the bees

Sweet girl kisses, and hope I stay on their good side. Plus they kinda look like flying sports bikes.

Bees or moth, chance of dying is significantly smaller compare to the rest of the group.

Mantids. I just think they're neat!

No spood lovers in here?! I could watch those Darth Maul lookin' mofos all day long.

Also love the joros 'cause they eat that which I despise the most: the brown marmorated stink bug.

Moth crew represent!

In the Control Center, making sure to nuke them from space. I know these are all statistically not aggressive, but I just can't shake the instinctive impulse to eradicate them...