Great tee shirt with words of wisdom that I bet you never realized

Ohhhh i thought it said duck and I was confused

Brag much.

Mine has a dick in it pretty regularly. The point is still valid...

So what? And I also wash my hands regularly. The point still stands. It's not gross, it's just a fact.

You'll touch my dick and you'll like it goddammit

Everyone has touched a vagina. You at least passed one on the way out.

Counter counter point: a great number of dicks have touched a vagina

Hey, uh, don't refer to male humans as "men" and then female humans as "females" like that. It's kinda dehumanizing.

Like, I get calling men, "males" and women "females", because I'll do that sometimes (I claim fur-brain as my defense, because calling anthro characters "man" or "woman" is weird); but try not to do the thing where you say "men" then "females" as if we're a complete different species. That's... just... not appropriate in a normal context.

You're assuming all women of sufficient age have had sex, which is just not true. Many women (and men) don't have an interest in sexual activity, or haven't had an opportunity to engage in it, regardless of age.

everyman

females

Everywomen/everymales

all [women] old enough for sexual interactions have had one in their hand.

Nah.

Bruh forgot about trans people, lesbians, and asexuals

Gonna has to go piece by piece through this:

obviously everyman has had a dick in his hand for obvious reasons.

This line is trans-exclusive, which would probably be given a pass by all but the most ardent trans-inclusive commenters, but still not great.

And all females

Dude. There are some times when an argument is made that saying "females" is not inherently objectifying, especially in a scientific, military, or other setting where people are categorized that way, with the significant difference being consistency (e.g. man/woman, male/female, etc). Using one then the other strips all that away and makes it seem like referring to women as "females" is just your normal tendency, which strongly suggests the objectifying behavior.

And all females old enough for sexual interactions have had one in their hand.

This is just obviously wrong, as plenty of lesbians, asexual people, or those with lack of access to sexual connections with others have not had a dick in their hands, and that is not an insignificant percentage of women, I'd imagine.

The next time I shake the hand of a woman I am going to wonder how many dicks she has had in that hand.

As if to underline the "females" comment, it's pretty telling that you feel it worth mentioning that you're going to wonder how many dicks were in the hands of women, but not men (especially funny since any man you meet has most likely had a dick in his hand more recently than a woman).

Sometimes it is difficult to notice your own biases, so I hope this makes you think about what leads you toward thinking like this, and just general self-reflection.

There are so many issues with this comment. Judgy and naïve in the best interpretation.

bro is gonna loose it when he learns about lesbians

Men/Women Male/Female

Those are the pairings you wanted. But, for fun, try swapping them next time and see what kind of attitude folks get.

Male/Women

Do it. Rustle some jimmies.

LOL. The politically correct police are on your ass tonight!

I cannot believe the seriousness of these replies. What is it the kids say? "Touch grass"?

This is why I force everyone to let me shake their hand

Me too. When in a social situation where it unavoidable I do it but then always wonder how many dicks has this hand handled

Some people are straight and left handed. Typically shake with your right. Possible to split the responsibility completely although has to be rare.