Are you being ripped off? Good luck!

The one that lists sheets is at least using a verifiable metric. It's better than the "right rolls of unspecified size are more than 39 different rolls of unspecified size".

Still silly because no one knows how many sheets they use before changing the roll, but at least it's reasonable silly.

Isn't it the same problem tho, since they can make the sheets smaller and say there's more without actually offering a longer roll?
- We need legally defined toilet paper roll standards.
- Helps that they tend to be square-ish, there's a subsection of people who would notice immediately if you can't fold perfect paper cranes from a single sheet while you're pooping.
- Oh, totally. It's by no means a good measurement, it's just the only one that's in some way tied to anything tangible. "8=39" doesn't mean anything.
- Which matters more total kg or mm² ?
The label usually says total surface area in the package. The stores near me break the price down to cost per unit of area, as well. This really untangles the 'how much should I pay for a quadrahedroll vs a dodecca butt sphere" worth of paper?
- Username checks out!

This is such bullshit. Pointless manipulation of product offerings to hide the true cost, and thereby manipulate prices. I’ve been doing paper towel math like this for years and it drives me nuts. Grocery stores’ profit model is now almost entirely based on price manipulation and nothing else.

yknow what’s great? unit pricing laws

tldr: in australia businesses must display “unit price” on labels: price per 100g, per 100ml, per sheet, etc for every product so that packages are comparable

I use unit pricing every time I shop. I am so thankful the accc made it required.
- ditto! i’d probably do it in my head for a lot of things still because metric is easy, but it saves me so much time and i’m sure i’m an outlier
The thing with toilet rolls though, is they show price per roll, but the rolls themselves have different amounts of sheets. So you gotta do the extra math.
Unless in your country they show price per sheet? Which I would assume would be below one cent.
- In Sweden I see price per kg for toilet paper. Which I guess can help you guesstimate, if you always look for 3 layers for example…?
- yup they show price per sheet by law
- Australia displays price per 100 sheets.
  Example:
There’s some brands that cheat this in Australia.
They have “select a size” or something, where they have smaller length sheets. So you get a bigger number of them and it shows a lower price/100 sheets.
Only ever seen the small length ones on the shelves, but I haven’t looked that hard though tbh.
We have this in the US for most things too, at least in Ohio where I'm from, not sure about other states or if it's a federal thing. I'm not an expert on the law of it, but I can't think off the top of my head anything that doesn't have it.
I believe paper towels and TP are $ per square foot or smth like that
- Square foot isn't a great estimate for toilet paper, because within certain limits no one cares about the width of their TP. This means manufacturers will enshittify their products by making the rolls slightly wider (but fewer sheets). The packaging makes it seem like they're selling the same amount, but you suddenly find yourself needing to buy more.

https://www.nytimes.com/2014/07/27/magazine/why-do-americans-stink-at-math.html

One of the most vivid arithmetic failings displayed by Americans occurred in the early 1980s, when the A&W restaurant chain released a new hamburger to rival the McDonald's Quarter Pounder. With a third-pound of beef, the A&W burger had more meat than the Quarter Pounder; in taste tests, customers preferred A&W's burger. And it was less expensive. A lavish A&W television and radio marketing campaign cited these benefits. Yet instead of leaping at the great value, customers snubbed it.
Only when the company held customer focus groups did it become clear why. The Third Pounder presented the American public with a test in fractions. And we failed. Misunderstanding the value of one-third, customers believed they were being overcharged. Why, they asked the researchers, should they pay the same amount for a third of a pound of meat as they did for a quarter-pound of meat at McDonald's. The "4" in "¼," larger than the "3" in "⅓," led them astray.

America: Failing 2nd grade math since the 1980s.

In fairness, the people they surveyed grew up breathing lead. I wonder if a modern audience would handle that test better
- Nope. Failure rate would be the same.
- The modern consumer would understand the a&w restaurant is probably run much more city than the McDonald's restaurant unfortunately. It's always interesting to me when I go to the McDonald's near my house that shares a parking lot with KFC / a&w and unfortunately that a&w and KFC restaurant is literally one of the worst run restaurants in my area. Only rivaled by the Wendy's three blocks away. Where is that McDonald's the worst they've done is late night they're shake machine and ice cream machine always seems to be broken and they get my order wrong probably one out of every five times. But not blatantly wrong every single order.
Should have called it the 2/6 pounder.
No one goes to A&W for their burgers, especially in the 80’s. Hot dogs and root beer.
- ... Which is greater, 1/3, or 1/4?

Toilet paper making is an ART! No other industry manages to create a half-ply so transparent that you can read your newspaper through it, while still delivering the tactile experience of an 80 grid industrial sandpaper.

Brother, just spend the few extra bucks and buy name brand, the extra money ain't gonna kill ya. Meanwhile, the TP you seem to buy now might have you bleeding to death from your ass.
- That's not my toilet paper, but one I recently had to endure on a non-private toilet. I was just amazed that they can actually produce such a paper. I'm quite attached to my ass and it's wellbeing, so sure I buy the better stuff for me and my family.

Wait till you hear about women's clothing sizes.

Super mega rolls, now with pockets!

I just look at the area of paper on the bottom. That's what it boils down to, right? Using standard rolls as some benchmark is meaningless.

All this effort to communicate the idea of bigger or smaller rolls instead of just giving us the total surface area. But then, this isn't about informing the consumer it's about making it seem bigger. If they just gave us a total measurement in sq ft that would make it too easy to compare prices.

It's like guys measuring their dick, they aren't terribly concerned with the validity of the measurement as long as the result sounds good.

If they just gave us a total measurement in sq ft that would make it too easy to compare prices.
They do, and it does.

Use a bidet. A single roll lasts me several months. It's mostly for spot checks on days where I've had especially greasy meals.

Bidet gang rise up.
- I think you've got the pressure too high...
Nah, real connoisseurs use a goose's neck.
Do you use, like, a blow drier too on your ass? because leaving moisture in your recently shitty ass crack sounds like a bad idea.
- No that's why you wipe after. To remove the moisture. The bidet removed the poop.

Given the information here, I believe that:

1 Giant Roll = 2.25+ Rolls = 2250+ Sheets

1 Double Roll = 2 Rolls = 2000 Sheets

1 Super Mega Roll = 6 Rolls = 6000 Sheets

1000 Sheets = 1 Roll = 0.5 Double Roll = 0.444 Giant Roll = 0.166 Super Mega Roll

1 Super Mega Roll = 2.666 Giant Roll = 3 Double Roll = 6 Roll = 6000 Sheets

I can take 6000 shits with one super mega roll?! WOW!
- Yes , if you use exactly 1 square each time.
  But someone so enterprising and smart like you probably uses both sides, so 12,000 shits per roll is on the table.

Go by weight. If you have two bundles that have the same number of rolls, the heavier one either has more or thicker squares.

And if they add lead or something else heavy to the packaging? Ha! Checkmate!
- Yeah be careful they be cutting the toilet paper with fent out there. Stay safe.

I wish they sold them by shits instead of by sheets. "This package is good for 100 regular shits or 50 creamy shits."

This would be incredibly unreliable. I'd rather want the hard facts: how many sheets per roll and how many plies

I just get my TP for free from the office

Every toilet paper related thread ever:

Jokes about paper quality
Americans describing their upgrade to a bidet like its the second enlightenment
Europeans feeling superior that they've been using bidets for a couple hundred years
The one random Asian trying to figure out where did humanity regress and perma downgrade from water to ass scratch material in the western world
No explanation as to how water users seems to magically dry themselves without tp, heat or air, yet watching a new user come out looking like it rained in the bathroom

And on rare occasions:

Westerners describing low pressure water cleaning with your hand like it will give you ebola, despite it being objectively more sanitary than toilet paper, and despite the fact that's how bidets used to work

Srsly tho how do they dry.

I wondering how a "super mega" roll will fit on a standard roll holder.

They sell an extender for that.
- Are they really asking for shit pics?
- How tf should this work? The holder doesn’t get any wider just by inserting a different roll holder pin

I wish toilet paper math worked on my bank account.

Is this unshittification?

That's usually what I use my toilet paper for

It's toilet paper, my biggest concern is price. Besides, I have bidet, I can make a pack of 8 last a year.

Holy sheets

In Canada at the bottom of the package they will tell you the dimensions of the sheet and sheets per roll or length I can't remember.

You still have to do math but the actual numbers are there for you to do it.

The real answer is just go to Costco and buy one of those giant packs with the massive sheets and don't think too much about it.

It's super expensive too. There are handmade papers from Japan that are less expensive than your average toilet paper.

By volume??? Where are you buying it? Also what're you eating? Chipotle 24/7?
I have a bidet and my toilet paper budget is literally 1 big Costco size pack per year at ~ $20. I could cut so many expenses before that is a problem spend.
- Get it from the grocery store. It's like $3.50 a square foot or something. Seattle, so it's expensive. Also, costco toilet paper sucks and no bidet.

Cornholio 2028!

Has anyone ever tried to call Greg at 1-667-693-5420 ?

What happened?

The bottom two make sense.

8 super mega = 48 reg.
24 double = 48 reg

So 1 super mega = 3 double = 6 reg
1 double is ⅓ super mega or 2 reg 1 reg = ⅙ super mega or ½ double

But how many giant rolls is 1 super mega? Is that more or less 4,000 sheets?

I guess $/kg (or any non-metric alternative) doesn't say much either.

I switched to Bamboo toilet paper. Renewable, saves old growth trees, and when bought in bulk online is as cheap as Walmart.

Almost all paper comes from byproducts if the lumber industry or recycled. Its the processes of papermaking that have huge impacts to the environment.
- Data? The NRDC says otherwise. They do a report every year on virgin forest use in Canada. https://www.nrdc.org/resources/issue-tissue
  For the record, it tracks recycling use, renewable fiber use, and bleaching. I think you're minimizing the impact.
- Yeah, TP is renewable by design, since it comes from trees. Being from a grass like bamboo doesn't change that, and bamboo isn't absorbent, so I'm very concerned about the process they're using to produce something that's supposed to be somewhat absorbent.

I’d bet 72 sheets of toilet paper that these calculations were made by the AI in Excel

Laughs in Bidet with heated set, water, and air dryer. We don't need no stinking toilet paper math.......

As a bidet owner, that's not fully true. I use significantly less toilet paper, but not zero.
Sometimes the dyer doesnt hit everything. Or I have to wipe the seat.
- Have a basket of towelettes around. Good for dabbing last drops and seat wipes.

I know harder math. Try to figure out how many calories are in microwave popcorn.

That seems very straightforward, where is the confusion?
- What's the calorie count in one bag then?
Well, how many teaspoons in a cup?
- 48 tsp = 16 tbsp = 8 fl oz = 1 cup
  Because fuck you, that's why.
190 in 36 g.

Well, shit...

Here in Czechia there are mandated price per unit, with tp it's iirc price per meter

This is why they have this stupid math on the packaging.
Because if all you look at is price / meter the lowest quality is obviously going to be the cheapest.
If you get 2-ply or 3-ply, it's 2-3 more sheets per meter and much softer. So more expensive per meter, but you can also use less since you can use 4 sheets instead of 8 and get the same softness/padding.