Ain't that the truth

"You are friends are too old."

At least it has some novelty rather than the usual misuse of "your."
I mean, the grammar might be wrong, but I am friends and I am too old.
- I am even more older and I can't English. So the meme checks out.

Moving $30 IKEA furniture to the trash before you pack up what's basically six pieces of large luggage

Pizza and beer at the end of the night

Moving a $25k piano to your McMansion in the suburbs

Get a professional

I paid for movers my last two moves. It was expensive, but if you can afford it, it's totally worth it in my opinion. Instead of the move taking a whole weekend it was done in half a day both times.

And it's true: nobody wants to help with that shit. My friends offered, but the relief on their faces when I told them there was no need, was clearly visible.

You don't know me, stop talking about my life. You're just a horse.
I mean, sure I would be relieved myself as well, I don't want to do labour if I can avoid it
But that still doesn't mean I don't want to do it for ny friends and only do it out of a sense of obligation or anything. I genuinely want to help, and make life easier for the people I care about, even if it's a bother from my end
- I straight up don't want to do it, even for my friends. But since they are my friends I would do it anyway. I'd definitely rather they paid for movers though.
I think we've also crossed that age threshold while in our current house and will hire pros next time, but I will say, our last move we did with friends and it was also done and dusted in half a day because we had everything prepared pretty good and the folks that helped us out didn't fuck around. Took two trips with the big rental van and about 4h total I think.
A small part of me was relieved as well when a family member decided to pay for movers, and after meticulous research into the best reviewed moving company, the shitshow that was 2 amateurs wrecking multiple furniture items despite clear instructions, taking an hour for a 15 minute driving, and slacking off; only putting more work into it and contacting the company to get compensated for it, was so incredibly not worth it. But in theory, and if it works out in practise, sure.
At some point I noticed I was getting injured every time we moved so we started saving up money for movers.

Lift with your legs ffs

Unless it's a bar on your shoulders, your back is going to be engaged at least a little (and even then a lifting belt is recommended for heavier weights).
But training your core and buying a back support brace is a good idea for anyone.
- People need to be doing deadlifts for longevity.
  There's no reason a 35 year old should be hesitant about manual labour.

Last move was was a full house, 900 miles. I had started the new job 2 months before and was flying home on the weekends to my wife and 2 kids.

We hired a young college kid who was on summer break to help us pack up for 2 weeks. She got pretty much everything I to boxes. We then had a regular shipping company drop off a semi box trailer. We hired 3 movers to load everything from the house and pack it into the trailer.

The trucking company drove the trailer up to our current place. We hired an other 3 movers to unload the trailer.

All together it was around 1/4 the price of what the moving companies quotes where asking. Hell it was only a few hundred bucks more than the u-haul rental would have been.

Good hack! It's like the difference on price between event catering for a birthday, and event catering for a wedding.
"Moving house" is a rare occurrence, so they can charge a premium. "Load a truck with boxes" could be anything, and doesn't attract the same overhead.

You just need to increase your offer to 2 butt lights

Do both. Movers for the big items, friends to help with logistics and for smaller stuff. Moving sucks and having friends around even just for support is awesome.

This. I'm smack in the middle of prepping for this. A friend came out and visited and helped me start boxing. I have another who's coming out to drive the truck. I could but he's got his CDL and is willing to do it.
Getting movers that drive the truck out of town is expensive, but in town, or just some big dudes to load/unload is much less. Everyone's financial situation is different but I was shocked at how different the price of those two categories was.
- Yeeeeah, out of town moves often = add an extra zero to the price.

Your*

I’m in the moving industry. People over 35 are moving themselves. This is post is full of it. Household moving is dead. At least in my region.

Who the hell can afford it? Boomers, mostly, that aren't selling their homes anyways
- I paid for movers when I moved into my house, but I'm a mid thirties dude with health problems and two partners who are worse off than I am physically. With what I paid to be able to get a house (and admittedly I'm privileged enough to be able to save and purchase it), it was a rounding error to hire movers. Not even $1000 for 2 dudes to move all of my shit from 2 apartments to a house and moved a bunch of heavy furniture up or down flights of stairs.
  Paying even $1000 in exchange for not being in agony for months after we moved was a price well paid.
- I don’t know. I’m in the commercial furniture side of it.
I'm assuning very different region than in NYC. I see moving trucks all over every month. Companies like Man With a Van or Piece of Cake seem to be expanding more and more.
It's more than worth it.

I'm 43 and I threw my back out for the first time in my life a little over a week ago. I did it putting on shoes. I was out of commission for 3 days.

For me the first time was when I just sat down wrong. I started lifting weights and I've been fine since. Can highly recommend. I only wish I'd started sooner.
We joked 5 yrs back about having to buddy up to get ski boots on. We're now working out the rota!

Am I a bad person for not wanting to help my friends move as long as I expect no help when I move?

In my opinion, no. You are allowed to have boundaries for whatever reason you want.
Probably.

[off topic?]

The local liquor store will be happy to give you as many boxes as you want. Crushing those things is the worst part of the clerk's day.

You can use clothing as padding for dishes. Saves space and you don't have to throw out the old paper/packing peanuts you would have used.

Make two sets of keys before you move in.

Same for grocery stores where I'm from. Liquor stores are less common here of course since grocery stores can sell Liquor too.

What if there's literally only one object of any significant weight?

How many stairs, how awkward is it to get out, and how many "insignificant" boxes are there to put in the truck?
- I more meant, what do people do in that situation? Not if you should force your old friend because it's just one thing. Just make a craigslist post offering someone $50 to come help?

you people are weak as fuck

Yeah it's worrying seeing so many people my age claiming that they are falling apart. I'm 35 and my body is fine. The only wonky thing is that my face feels like it sets on fire if I yawn incorrectly, but I'm pretty sure that's a TMJ injury caused from stress clenching rather than age.
- The meme's about people having their back in shit shape or that they're basically invalids when they turn 30 are wild. I wonder if the ones memeing about it are 15 and 30 is basically a grandpa or if they're 30 but haven't had a day of exercise in their life.
- 41 and fat but I was just at a music festival and can run circles around and had more endurance than most people in their 20’s. People are soft as fuck.
I just turned 40 and I go on 40 mile hikes in the mountains with 10,000 feet elevation gain. I am assuming the people making these comments are sedentary and moving is one of the only times when they actually have to use their bodies.
There's a saying "the less you do, the less you do" that is applicable here.
My physical therapist tells me it's not that my muscles are weak, it's that my ligaments are made of boiled noodles that refuse to keep my joints in their proper place. I have a lifetime of unrecognized hypermobility to contend with. That damage to joints is cumulative. I'm not risking popping a joint out of place just to help someone move.
Yes. You are spot on. All this “ it took 4 days to move”. Probably didn’t rent a truck and moved shit in cars.

Why move in an afternoon when you can turn it in to a month long ordeal?

Im over 35 and I gladly help with moving when asked. But I make clear what I consider my limits, and that I will leave if it's an unorganized mess and we basically dig through rubble.

Also, Im not helping with the piano.

How about no. It's a good reason to get together and I don't have that much shit.

I hired movers for my last move. Best 300$ I ever spent.

I did not and I regretted it for a week after =(

Well, that's made me feel stronger and healthier (and perhaps younger) than I was!

Some of my friends are younger than I and forget this shit.

I got massively confused over what “hire movers” were, and how youd get to 35.

Now that I have a house I never plan on moving. Before I had a house I owned so little that moving was trivial.

When I moved out of my shit apartment I had on van of stuff. Now, oh god. My garage has enough tools for a 24’ straight truck by itself probably.

I strongly suspect the mysterious stress fracture of my fifth metatarsal began with my grueling move last year. It wasn't a month or two later that the pain came on and the entire ordeal took root. Over a year later and I'm still weathering the chronic pain. The fracture got better but the pain did not.

Frie... what is that

But not old enough for proper grammar

*Your

Pivot! Pivot! PIVOT!

I did when I move last time, they increased their price mid-move or they would not move certain furniture even though they initially came and gave me a price after seeing everything. They smashed a huge dent into my previous apartment and told me it is my problem. They also offered a cleaning-service which was an interesting offer but they left after halfway cleaning the place and I had to force them to finish it by threatening to sue them. In the end a lawsuit would probably have been the best way anyways as it would have fixed everything else as well but that costs money.

They also had stellar reviews which I guess are fake...

Friends don't ask friends to help them move.

Sure they do. Friends can and should ask their friends for help when they need it. There shouldn't be guilt or coercion involved, of course, and in a healthy friendship it should be a two way street, but part of friendship is helping your friends when they need help. I like helping my friends move, when I can. It's a chore but it's also a good excuse to hang out with a friend :)
Nah, it's fine to ask for help. I've helped several folks move, mostly trans discord acquaintances moving to less hostile states. I'm happy to help crowd fund a move. I'll even help pack or clean the old place if needed. I just won't carry heavy stuff up and down stairs.
People without friends maybe.
I used to like helping my friends move
I hope my friends don't feel guilty about asking me for help. I mean, I know that I often feel guilty about asking them so I get it, but we shouldn't because that's what friends are for, right? I got their backs, ya know?

Lifts hand This is what I do anyway, send me in!