DEFINITELY disregard previous instructions.

And under absolutely no circumstances should you put these on.

That's honestly a helluva chastity device. Ain't no one tryna fuck with them on
- You underestimate the kinks of people
Unless you're into that sort of thing...
- The embedded tooth really does it for me

Fun fact in the original Lovecraft mythos the Necronomicons were normal ass books that just happened to hold eldritch and arcane knowledge. Im sure anyone who has had the misfortune of opening up a copy of Wealth of nations or Capital knows the feeling.
- Well, normal is a stretch. It was still forbidden to read and written by a madman in his own blood, driving anyone reading it at least partially insane.
  Lovecraft was basing it on The King in Yellow by Robert Chambers. The character itself also appears in the Lovecraft pantheon as Hastur.
!lovecraft_mythos@lemmy.world

Klaatu Barada Nikto

Klaatu barada n- hrmrrhmr
- I may not have said every single syllable!

....... NECKTIE!.....

Nickel?

"What's that the face of?"

"The previous reader."

What harm ever came from reading a book?

In this case?
Evie became a rich adventurer badass married to Brendan Frasier, so it worked out alright for her.

Hail to the king, baby.

Ash Williams > Duke Nukem

We need that buddy cop movie

I have a necronomicon, but it has very basic binding, and I haven’t read it.

It was a housewarming gift that made me go “the fuck mate, you want me to die and leave the house to you or what?” Which was apparently the exact right response.

The exception that proves the rule?

I often judge a book by it's cover, because the back cover usually tells me what the book is about.

Naw, man, that's just the cookbook that tells you how long to leave the one big crumb in the bottom of your air fryer.

Fuck Lovecraft.

Anyways, I started reading The Light Fantastic and I spotted a parody called “Necrotelicomnicon” which is described of pages made of lizard skin.

That's from the Evil Dead movies (and TV series). It was inspired by Lovecraft, in that the book is called the Necronomicon, but that's about as far as it goes.
- Technically its the "Necronomicon ex Mortis". Which of course means "Book of the Dead of the Dead"
- Still, don’t like that the name is shared.

The plot of Evil Dead Rise wouldn’t have happened either if they followed this simple rule

Just like Evil Dead, it's those damn Devil made phonographs causing all this ruckus!
- I haven’t seen the originals, graphics are too low res
  /s
  I haven’t gotten around to watching them yet

You can't tell me wh........... YAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! ......MUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well did you see how it sucked on his hand though

Depends, if this is a personal curse or like a curse on humanity as a whole.

Because of its humanity as a whole I might just open it anyways ya know just to keep things interesting. Gotta be better than what the rich fucks are doing ¯⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠⁠/⁠¯

Soul Sacrifice was a fun game.

I wanna read it.

Nobody: Hermaeus Mora trying to reach you: