Approved Hate Speech

My mom just read me a text message she got from her half-sister who is in stage 4 renal failure (or something imminently fatal like that, although I've been hearing this for about 10 years now). I was feeling sorry for her until my mom got to the point where she said she was "looking forward to meeting Jesus and Charlie Kirk".

I would just reply with "Bitch, you're going to hell, you're only meeting Charlie Kirk there."
- "you can meet one, or the other, but not both."
- And Maggie Thatcher and Ronald Reagan. So many conservative herpes!
  Edit: I meant to type heroes, but this works too.
Ignoring your actual point, something like end-stage renal disease requiring dialysis has a life expectancy of around 5 years, but even 10+ years on dialysis is not unheard of.
- FWIW she has refused dialysis.
- They really don’t have people on dialysis that long anymore. My best friend is currently on dialysis.
Adults with the mental disorder called religion need treatment, preferably medicated to the nostrils.

... Good thing I use MasterCard

Hhahahahaha

"It's worth the cost of, unfortunately, some gun deaths [...] so that we can have the Second Amendment" - Charlie Kirk, 2023

That's why I say 'hey man, nice shot.'
- Zombie kill of the week.

JD Vance is Vice President of The United States and somehow he is still a loser. Like not a bad person, of course JD is an awful, hateful human... I mean JD Vance genuinely firehoses out loser vibes everywhere he goes despite on paper being an immensely powerful boy (one of the most powerful boys!).

He’s so bland and draining that the pope died hours after a Vance Exposure Event.
I hypothesize that if the entire nation is subjected to a VEE, we could face devastating losses.
- the pope died hours after a Vance Exposure Event.
  Yet, somehow, Trump hasn't succumbed (yet) to extended exposure to Vance.
If he takes over he’s going to have a hard time. People won’t follow him blindly like they do for trump. He’s going to try to be tough but it will be so cringy that he won’t get the support he needs to back it up.
- Who knows, I still can't understand how people can take Trump seriously, let alone form a cult following.

...for everything else, there's MasterCard.

But not for "erotica featuring animal related topics", so since you bought that catgirl hentai game on Steam, your cards are revoked for "financially supporting the sexual exploitation of animals".
- How did you know I bought catgirl hentai games on Steam?

You've always been allowed to threaten the designated groups but not allow to threaten the rulers power.

JD Vance was actually a model for the Gerber Babyfood label.
Yeah but he’s pounding Ozempic now. As regulated by his owners.

Soo, are "watermelon people" people who really like watermelon, black Americans, or Oompa Loompas because their skin is kinda like the flesh and the hair is the rind? Or fat folk who wear stripey green onesies

I thought it was Palestinians, but now that I think about it there's no way your average American racist can make that connection.
It's black people
- _
Green on the outside, red on the inside?
- If overheating or very sunburnt aha
You get one guess.
- I Have Chosen.
  Edit: Watermelon Festival image #2
Or gay/queer/trans?

But if you quote Ace Frehley you'll get a HELL YEAH

So Charlie Kirk, J. D. Vance, and Donald Trump walk into a gas champer and get raped...

Plot twist, no-one else was in the chamber. They did it to each other.
- I'm kinda impressed they managed a triangle of non consent.
"Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Not Charlie Kirk any more."
- That's it, the freedom committee decided you're not bald eagle enough and are no longer welcome in the land of cholesterol.
This one is a fine joke and makes a point, but let's not take it farther. Normalizing this nazi shit serves their agenda if it begins to disconnect from one-off commentary on their speech.
Trump by an anal fetishist using his tiny hands as dildos, Vance by a trans man's neodick and Kirk in the neckhole by... A duck jesus christ I feel like I just invented a sick version of Clue
I love stories with happy endings!

That dude is awesome on X. I recently followed him and he is hilarious imo.

He's on Bluesky too. Just fyi, in case you might want to consider not being on Twitter anymore.
- X is a cesspool of a lot of right wing BS (I've just learned to ignore it) but it also has large groups of people who are interested in basically all of the more niche things that I am interested in. Bluesky, Mastodon, Lemmy, etc. just do not even come remotely close unfortunately.