Red flag or green flag?

"Has trouble finding things" hmmm.
"Persistent"

Legit, I like her immediately. She's interesting. Enjoy, she may be a keeper!

Green flag. This is science girlfriend behavior

(in George Takei's voice) Oh, my!
- I'm universe, that would be Ricardio's voice
- How on earth did we make this a three way???

One time I was meeting someone for a second date. I got a seat at a table outside. There's a fence and a gate between that area and the sidewalk.

I see her walk by. She sees me. She waves. She keeps walking and is gone.

I'm have so many questions. I text her.

Turns out she didn't know there was a gate in the fence there and thought you had to go like around the long way, but for solid moment I thought she was like aggressively standing me up.

We dated for a few years and are still friends.

If I were her, I'd totally try to look super-cool and hop over the fence. This would probably end with me hurting myself and/or looking like an idiot.
- Then you get sympathy and a story to tell at parties. I see no downside.
Sounds like your date didn’t pan out, bud.

I would say this is definitely not a red flag.

But I'm also not saying it's green. Probably more green than anything... Maybe a nice seafoam.

The Good is that she wasn't angry and was being patient. Letting you figure it out. The not great but not bad part of this is that she did nothing to help.

I would have just stepped outside for "some fresh air" and wait for the person to notice me standing next to the entrance. That way I'm helping them, but only a little, they still have to find me. Finding me may be easier than finding the establishment that we agreed to meet at.

The key here is to not go out and call them over. Let them find you. If you call them, it's kinda difficult to walk the line of, "oh hey, I'm over here" and not cross over into "get over here stupid. I had to come get you because you're to dumb to find things yourself".... Best play is just to make yourself more obvious.

I wouldn't say this is a green flag as it is, but it's definitely not a red one.

The not great but not bad part of this is that she did nothing to help.
She gets this opportunity to study his thinking from this perspective ONCE. Let her enjoy, and if she still likes him, and he likes her, that was an awesome move!
Coming back to edit... if I'm the lost dude, and she comes out to grab me, that's embarrassing. Fuck that. Everything that happened was good. It's a green flag now.
It's a red flag on the third date.
- That's a fine opinion. You have every right to disagree with me and I'll fight anyone who tries to take that away from you.
  We may not agree on this, but it's not worth getting bothered about. Enjoy your day!
Hehehe I'm way too autistic for this type of internal monologue.
Hey fren wassup!
- ADHD here. We study behavior so we can mask.
  It becomes almost rudimentary when you notice the patterns. Just need to know what to look for and constantly be thinking of how the other person will see it.

I once saw a professor on my way to his class and, since I really abhor small talk, I kept walking just far back enough for him to not notice me until we got to the classroom where he just kept walking straight ahead. I went in and 15 minutes later he arrived saying "I couldn't find the classroom". No, it wasn't the first class.

that's a keeper. humour, and no misplaced respect.

Maybe we're all a little flag fatigued, and we don't need to analyze every behavior of a bunch of jumped up apes on a scorecard of correct and incorrect answers for every decision they make?

I get that we are all hyper-aware of just how bad it can get if we don't pay attention to warning signs in 2025, but can't someone do something a little quirky without it being an indicator of virtue or flaw?

Hmm, nuance to social interaction, green flag!
- Life of brian: you're all individuals. _{"not me"}
Would it be better to just say, do you like it or don't like it? Cause I like a little quirky and no, a single post from a stranger doesn't make us all into world renowned psychoanalysts.

That’s a both flags if I ever heard one

Green flag, letting you make your own mistakes without getting mad

Hmmmm... maybe it was neither a red flag nor a green flag. Maybe it was just scientific curiosity. Mouse in a maze type of thing haha

Makes it a green flag to me tbh

Green flag, she's down for social experiments

100% Green Flag. She was checking you for red flags and aware of her surroundings.

Did you panic? Ask someone else? Freak out and leave? Pick your nose? Exhibit signs of being nuts? No? You figured it out and were not weird? Great. Then she doesn't need to duck out before you find the place. OP posting about this online means she ought to cut it off with him, she's better than him.

Edit: Some of y'all need to talk to a woman some time.

OP posting about this online means she ought to cut it off with him, she’s better than him.
Why? It's just usual micro blogging. There's no critique, just a mention of what happened, perhaps just to share something funny. You just write things you found worthy of mentioning, post them, and see if anyone else finds it interesting.
- Seriously, I even took it as a bit of bragging.
- One person is aware of their surroundings and the actions of someone else that is on a date with them. They openly share that with the other person, showing open communication and transparency.
  The other person whines about it online in an echo chamber.
  Microblogging it is seeking judgement and not being sure what judgement to set it up with will play better. Which is why, if this is even real, the OP is dog water.
This is like a parody of /r/relationshipadvice or something
- It's 100% something my spouse would do and has done, who does a lot of work supporting women protecting themselves.
  But sure, she's the asshole. My bad.
OP posting about this online means she ought to cut it off with him, she's better than him.
The fuck is wrong with people. Being safe is good, testing people is manipulative and does not make anyone safer. It's antisocial behavior, it is not a virtue
- testing people is manipulative
  You think watching someone through a window is manipulative?
- Testing people like, "i put them in a shitty situation like pretended to cheat on them and see how they reacted" is shitty and manipulative.
  Observing someone and how they process a situation is not manipulative.
- How did this woman "test' someone by just seeing them from a distance? How were they manipulated?
- This is throwing one bad take on top of another.

All these comments about her but nobody has asked how it took him 7 minutes to find a cafe in one intersection? It's not a secret lair, presumably enough people find it that it stays in business.

Something similar happened to me. I can 100% vouch for this guy. I had to go to a neighboring locale and ask them and it was like immediately next door. Knowing the address, GPS, and street view did nothing to help me. I was all like “ok, this entrance has the house number immediately before where I needed to go, and the next visible door had the house number immediately after where I needed to go, where the absolute fuck is this?”
- I don't know about your town but in most places odd numbers are on the opposite side of the street from even numbers, so that scenario would mean you should look across the street.
Some road crossings are bad, and some roads are wide. And you may have to wait to cross to an island, then wait there to go further.
Example:

And you could have more of these.
- Agreed. But it's written as if he couldn't find it, not that it took forever to negotiate the intersection. Also, her coming out wouldn't have helped him in that case.
- Ah yes, those are sometimes pedestrian speed challenges and reward those willing to dash across at sometimes unmarked times!

I think a second date would be needed at least before claiming red or green flag. She sounds interesting, but I have concerns that it could get bad quick...

Sadist, red flag imho.

But like, that red flag looks hella fun... I wonder if they have a leash :3
- Mmm...I mean no! Bad!

I would have been fascinated by this attitude and we would have had an extensive conversation on the risks and controls of this process

I probably would have done the same thing. Sounds cute to watch.

Saw you in stress, could help but didn’t. That’s bright fucking Red.

Wanted to see how you handled the stress. Illuminating green.

GREEN. If u don't date her, I will. But maybe I just have a thing for pranksters.

Depends on how hot she was.

- I still would.

My only thought would be "she wanted to stare at me?"

Doing it is kinda shitty, but I think most people would watch their date for a minute or two and it’s not a big deal imo (especially because we don’t know if they watched him for a full sevenish minutes). Telling you about it could be because they don’t have the white lie filter, because they thought it would break the ice, or because they like to put people on the back foot.

So I guess yellow flag: proceed with caution (I was going to make a joke about yellow lights, but they were all really shitty on second thought in context)

I'd say go for it, but tread carefully.