Get the mold out!

There was that tweet from a few years ago about how so many old ladies on their death bed would confess to killing their husbands.

I'm starting to piece it all together.

Accidental home deaths plummet when divorce rates rise.
- Wait, seriously? Do you have a source? Sounds like one of those spurious correlations to me.
- I mean even just from a totally innocent position, I'm exhausted right now and in the past month I've almost died falling down the stairs 5 times from the sleep deprivation (the ER is getting sick of my clumsiness)
  I know I'll sleep better once my cohabitation separation is finalised.
  This morning I brushed my teeth with my partner's athletes foot ointment. Didn't even realise it tasted like ass and felt like wax until I was trying to spit it out and wondering why it was clinging to my teeth. I'm just not human anymore, I am physically and mentally burnt out carrying the entire cognitive and household labour load of the relationship for the last 10 years.
- Wouldn't it be inverted? Don't let women get divorced and they kill their husbands?
When you're not legally permitted to divorce, other means become necessary.
- Goodbye Earl

I will never understand how anyone could come to thinking aspic was a good idea.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aspic

Kraft Heinz (makers of JELL-O) propaganda.
Literally, the reason food went to shit in the '50s was because that's when all the shelf-stable and processed "convenience foods" that had been invented for WWII started getting heavily marketed to the public.
- I mean... you have to imagine a world without refrigeration. Now it's ubiquitous, we have it everywhere, you can even get portable battery-powered refrigeration boxes. But at the time, cold meant icebox... literally a box that you put a big block of ice in to keep other stuff cold.
  You say "food went to shit" but all those things were a real change to the previous millennia of salted meats and pickled vegetables because there was no other way to keep food edible until the next harvest. It was new and interesting.
- It's existed as a dish since at least 1375. Way before Heinz. And it was eaten all over the world with many variations. Your Heinz conspiracy is meritless. Read the link in the comment you replied to.
Interesting, I had never heard of this before.
I was immediately horrified, but it appears they date back to at least 1375 and predate fruit gelatin dishes, which makes sense considering gelatin is meat deprived. It also appears they were used for preservation, which... I guess you gotta do what you gotta do.
It being described as "essentially a gelatinous version of conventional soup." And "like ruby on the platter, set in a pearl ... steeped in saffron thus, like garnet it looks, vibrantly red, shimmering on silver" certainly piques my curiosity.
- *derived
Why does this sound like a slur?
- Without the "a," it is a slur.
  It also kind of sounds like "ass-pick" which makes it sound vulgar.
  Unfortunate all around.
We have this in Ukraine. My grandma unironically loves it and cooks it from time to time. It's basically jellified soup
Culinary disaster but I must say that it looks cool!
- Looks so cool that I want to keep it contained in glass and left in a museum.
Don’t forget the lark’s tongue!
Great History channel (YouTube) video from Sohla El-Waylly about uses of OG aspic: https://youtu.be/Uqt-oyrL460
Холодец это вкусно!

At least bring back the cocaine in cough drops.

And codeine in cough syrup.
- Seriously. If we're really going to go back to the 1950s, then do it right, or don't do it at all.

Jello with floating cigarette ashes and mayo frosting.

I would joke about there being poison in this culinary sin experiment too, but I'm a millennial and you just don't threaten a millennial with a shorter life.

And the lead and asbestos

Nah, no need to bring those back. The role is already filled by microplastics and PFAS
- Pretty sure neither of those are new. Synthetic clothing and tires started after WWII. PFAS were used in nylon at the time and teflon was invented in 1938.
- At least asbestos was useful.