Im sure his side of the story isn't warped to make himself seem like a saint and her a bitch. đ
I just got out of a relationship and holy fuck that shit is infuriating. Everyone's gotta side curious what happened here.
Also are you the horse from Bojack Horseman? I'm literally watching S1E6 right now.
What is this, a crossover episode?
She was planning on having 5 km of cock run on her, now her plans are ruined.
This is almost exactly how I found out my ex-wife was cheating. She bought a ticket to a concert and then freaked out when I bought one too. Why wouldn't I want to go to a concert with my wife? She said it was just going to be a thing with her friends from work. When we arrived there was exactly one friend from work. A guy friend.
Because Iâm procrastinating at work:
How many sessions of coitus might it take to accumulate 5 km of cock thrusts?
Estimates:
- average erect length: 13 cm (from Perplexity.ai)
- average number of thrusts in coitus: 300 (ibid)
Calculations
- thrust distance per coitus session: 13 cm x 300 thrusts x 2 (accounting for insertion & removal) = 78 m
- coitus sessions to accumulate 5 km of thrusts: 5 km / 78 m = 64.1 -> 64 sessions of coitus
So OPâs wife would have to fuck 64 times to accumulate 5 km of cock. Even with amazing refractory periods, thatâs still a minimum of 32 guys running a train on her.
Edit: working through this reminded me of that episode of HBOâs Silicon Valley where they started talking about handjobs and hotswapping dicks and hit on middle out compression.
The all new penis 2.0 now with hotswap capabilities.
Anon is jealous
If true the wife probably wanted some alone time with her boyfriend and her husband ruined it.
How do people marry each other when they canât even communicate?
A: People who never experienced it fear loneliness more than they fear death.
B: People change over time, the person you married might not be the same person in 10 years.
Apparently, a lot.
It is weird interacting with those couples too. Sometimes they just play a role with their spouse and have to get away from them to be themselves.
They are as miserable as it sounds.
Why would OP's wife not just sign herself up if she was going to run? Or realise something was off when her partner told her that they'd done it for her. "Hello, I'd like to sign my wife up for this run. Oh no, I won't be participating myself." Feels kind of weird. But this a 4chan post so can't possibly be fake or gay.
Fake: OP can barely get from the chair to the bathroom, no way they're running anywhere.
Gay: OP's "wife" is a their regular pizza delivery person, which is a dude. The friendly banter at the door got weird quick.
if it where true, it would be because she is planning to run with her boyfriend.
Umm yeah very irregular behavior!
Anon fucked up. Anon should have known not to sign themselves up. 100% anons fault.
She can't run for shit, I'd bet. She wasn't running anywhere except to her side piece's house. Point was to be away, the excuse was the 5k.
