Programmer Humor @programming.dev chraebsli @programming.dev 5mo ago

Stop comparing programming languages

Python is versatile
JavaScript is powerful
Ruby is elegant
C is essential
C++
Java is robust

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154 comments

PHP is old

HTML is NOT A PROGRAMMING LANGUAGE!!!

CSS is
︎ ︎ ︎ not alig-

︎ ︎ ︎ ned
Python is NameError: name 'term_to_describe_python' is not defined

JavaScript is [object Object]

Ruby is TypeError: Int can't be coerced into String

C is segmentation fault

C++

Java is

Exception in thread "main" java.lang.NullPointerException: Cannot read the termToDescribeJava because is null at ThrowNullExcep.main(ThrowNullExcep.java:7) Exec.main(ThrowNullExcep.java:7)

CSS j ust # sucks

<HTML />

Kotlin is type inference failed. The value of the type parameter K should be mentioned in input types

Go is unused variable

Rust is Compiling term v0.1.0 (/home/james/projects/Term)
Mfw Rustaceans don't exist :(

Also, JavaScript...why are you the way you are? Does anyone have advice for learning it so it makes sense? I can't even get tutorial projects to run properly...
Just accept it, all languages suck
ITT: Rust programmers rewriting the joke in Rust.
C++ is OVERWHELMINGLY SUPERIOR, if you ask any professional C++ developer.
Are those adjectives randomly chosen?
C++ is fine

Python is fine

C# is fine

PHP is fine

JavaScript is fine

C is fine

Java is fine

I could go on
There was an adjective for C++. It's just the pointer was dropped.
JavaScript is powerful

Old joke (yes, you can tell):

"JavaScript: You shoot yourself in the foot. If using Netscape, your arm falls off. If using Internet Explorer, your head explodes."
C++ is all of those, provided you pick any 10% of it.

You're not supposed to cast every spell in the evil grimoire.
C++ is a surprise CVE generator.

Anti Commercial-AI license
C# is also here
The only reason I use C++ is because that's what all the main audio plugin tools use. It's warty and annoying, although I'm confused why Java would rank higher
what about Holy C? is it only usable to people that are actually god choosen programmers?
Rust has safety and efficiency close to C

Perl is processing most of your healthcare records

Ada is doing space stuff

Go is going places
Ruby is just happy to be included
What is C essential for anymore these days? Genuine question btw.

I thought C++ was essential for microprocessor control, but that it depends and sometimes I gather people use C instead, but not always.

Use the language that the company hires you to know:-).
There is another That you might say is a little rusty
Java is robust haha
C++ catchin strays
I was caught by surprise and for some reason this joke clicked so much that I laughed for a while. Kudos
Stop comparing tools

Hammer is heavy

Wrench is elegant

Saw is versatile

Screwdriver

Drill is exciting

such pointless
Tea? i saw it once in a wikipedia article.

154 comments