o7___o7 @ o7___o7 @awful.systems

[redacted] enthusiast, robot combat enjoyer, distressingly Appalachian, fat

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Joined

2 yr. ago

You should probably read "Monarchy Considered Harmful" (1776)

Edit: sorry I'll behave now

Hey I think I discovered a way to fix America! What if we rewrite the US Constitution in Rust?

Thinking of yall

Has anyone in the US noticed Kroger/Ralph's/etc piping in AI slop music?

Hell yeah 💪

100% thought the story was gonna end with "she died."

Rooting for your kitty!

I hear ya!

I guess Neom is what happens when a billionaire in the desert gets infected by the seastedding brainworms.

Neom update:

It reminds me of the bizzare and ill-omened rituals my ancestors used to start a weed eater.

Latter Say Daints

New believers spreading the "good news" eh?

When you go so hard you Hadamard

https://mastodon.social/@flub/115813129429389749

Seventh Day Add-fent-ists

Zyn Bhuddists

right? lol but I cant it's too popular with the kiddos

CW: Slop, body humor, Minions

So my boys recieved Minion Fart Rifles for Christmas from people who should have known better. The toys are made up of a compact fog machine combined with a vortex gun and a speaker. The fog machine component is fueled by a mixture of glycerin and distilled water that comes in two scented varieties: banana and farts. The guns make tidy little smoke rings that can stably deliver a payload tens of feet in still air.

Anyway, as soon as they were fired up, Ammo Anxiety reared its ugly head, so I went in search of a refill recipe. (Note: I searched "Minions Vortex Gun Refill Recipe") and goog returned this fartifact*:

194 dB, you say? Alvin Meshits? The rabbit hole beckoned.

The "source links" were mostly unrelated except one, which was a reddit thread that lazily cited ChatGPT generating the same text almost verbatim in response to the question, "What was the loudest ever fart?"

Luckily, a bit of detectoring turned up the true source, an ancient Uncyclopedia article's "Fun Facts" section:

https://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/Fartium

The loudest fart ever recorded occurred on May 16, 1972 in Madeline, Texas by Alvin Meshits. The blast maintained a level of 194 decibels for one third of a second. Mr. Meshits now has recurring back pain as a result of this feat.

Welcome to the future!

• yeah I took the bait/I dont know what I expected

Removing software that's made by confirmed idiots ought to be a solid security play, right?

oof ow my bones why do my bones hurt?

–a man sipping from a bottle labeled “bone hurting juice”