Elon Musk and Mark Zuckerberg agree to hold cage fight
Elon Musk and Mark Zuckerberg agree to hold cage fight
Two of the world's most high-profile technology billionaires - Elon Musk and Mark Zuckerberg - have agreed to fight each other in a cage match.
Why.
Their parents didn't show them enough affection at a critical developmental stage.
This is both a hilarious quip and probably very accurate
Did I accidentally click on a satire site that looks like the BBC??
I feel like reality has become a satire of itself at this point.
Writers at The Onion have never had a harder time...
Okay I'm convinced, we live in a simulation. No way this isn't alien reality tv.
What the hell, I thought this was satire. Is this... not the onion?
if you read the article it's just some joke tweets that bbc decided to make up a misleading title about.
Yes lets put the ultra rich in the Colosseum and have them fight for our entertainment.
Then we eat them, yes?
I hope they both lose.
What a time to be alive.
This whole timeline is terrible. No writer would dare submit the screenplay.
I don't know, I kind of liked Guns Akimbo. If it wasn't being pitched as a documentary, I'd probably take a risk on it.
Pair of bellends
Meh...make it exciting by fighting in a DIY submarine diving in the ocean!
When Zucc gets enough damage, will the fight's second phase have him activate all the hidden cyborg gizmos?
So Zuck's response of "Send Me Location" is an MMA meme from this, looks like BBC missed that though lol. My guess is that we won't see a billionaire cage match any time soon, which is probably a good thing because I think it would be like the McGregor v Mayweather fight where we all just leave sad to have watched it.
Here's hoping that they both perish from inoperable brain aneurysms brought on by blunt force trauma.
A fight to the death and the winner gets a submarine tour of the Titanic.
This is literally a money making scheme and no one else can convince me otherwise
I'll believe it when I see it. It's like those two kids at school who liked to talk tough and arrange a fight, only to both called their mums to pick them up.
Click bait title, sounds like Musk talking out his ass again. No way either of them take the risk of injury or disability.
I almost never work out, except for picking up my kids & throwing them in the air
Sprinting away before they come back down is great cardio. You got this Elon!
TFW it isn't to the death
I hope they beat the shit out of each other and dont pull their punches
Wish they would.
Incidentally, wtf is bluesky? I literally have never heard of it, apparently a Twitterlike?
Jack Dorsey's new venture, it promises to be decentralized apparently. I expect it to be about as decentralized as cyrpocurrency.
it's a twitter clone that some people in the tech community are excited about for reasons I cannot understand.
The next disappointment waiting to happen in a couple of years. I predict the headline will be something like "Corporate greed strikes again, Bluesky is going against its community"
It's meant to be a decentralised version of Twitter. I think it was originally made by Twitter but is now a separate company.
But I don't think it uses the ActivityPub protocol that Lemmy, Kbin, and Mastodon use, so it won't be interoperable with them. Also, it's invite-only for the moment. So if you want a decentralised Twitter-like experience right now, you could use Mastodon.
I guess the question would be whether Zuckerberg is Season 1 Data or Insurrection Data.
If it's the former, Elon might stand a chance. If it's the latter, may God have mercy on us all.
Every day we spiral further into an unwritten season of "Silicone Valley"
Unless Elon is a secret jujitsu guy Zucks wins this easy. Zuckerberg actually trains. Both suck and billionaires as a class shouldn't exist. But as a big MMA fan for 20+ years and knowing Zuckerberg actually takes it moderately seriously, Elon gonna tap.
Strange but I am rooting for Zuckerberg.
Taekwondo champ
Jiu-Jitsu. Apparently he is quite good at it.
At least he actually created Facebook himself.
Depends on what you mean by created. Wasn't his idea and he intentionally sabotaged the people whose idea it actually was so his would take off.
Are we living in The Onion metaverse? I read the article and can't believe it's reality.
Well let's hope they each receive fatal injuries.
Musk has the ego of an 'influencer', he just needs the attention it seems.
is then when america officially jumps the shark?
Zuck's gonna have a hard time making contact, since spez's mouth is welded to Musk's cock.
Lizard vs Space Dildo
Based on betting sites, I see an estimated 83% chance Zuckerberg wins if they do it.
Seems more likely Musk backs out but I don't see those odds being tracked.
Throw the cage in the ocean once they're locked in. Neptune requires the sacrifice of more oligarchs
We need a nottheonion community. This is wild.
Further proof reality is a simulation.
Oh great I hope it's soon because this will dominate news and social media until and for quite a while after.
Let's make it extra fun. Add weapons to it.
I started not to like when people who have some kind of authority constantly try be all silly and goofy and "meme-y". It never seem to go well when theyre like that, they often ended up being really immature or have big ego/hubris, and causing harm because of it. So bc of that im not amused by this tho im sure they think this would amuse us 'commoners' and that theyre 'totally fitting in.' As much as I dont think is necessary for anyone to have that much money, in a world where billionaires do exist id rather they be decent or at least mature and not hear about them constantly, than to hear about them constantly because theyre immature and always trying for attention.
Is that a joke are we april 1st ?
The Zuck channeling his inner Khabib.
Why would Musk agree to this? Unlike Zuckerberg he has zero history with combat sports
Elon has the height and weight advantage, and he is an idiot
Oh boy a new way for them to advertise themselves.
Who cares? Ik i dont, even more so bc its these 2
My money's on The Zuck.
Yeah, zuck has training and musk has diabetic meds he used to lose weight.
Jesus fucking christ we just had to shoot that gorilla
Top ten BL drama plots that no one asked for.
This is hilarious if they actually did, but it looks like Elon is just memeing on Zuck since Zuck has been doing martial arts, and Elon was talking about his own technique "the walrus" where he just lays on his opponent. The only time I would feel good about giving either of these two money is to watch them beat the tar out of each other.
Based.
The only issue I have with this is that only one of them can lose.
Just woke up and still half asleep. My brain cannot comprehend that headline.
Attention whores. Won't buy.
Is this the new Celebrity Deathmatch reboot we've been waiting for?
At first everything about this was infuriating but now I want to see the entire C-suite of Meta and Twitter face off in gladiatorial combat, and we can stream it all on twitch and bet on who will live
They are nothing but hot air until they really do it. And when they really do it, they will look and be really stupid.
Don't fan their vanity by paying attention to stupid people doing stupid things. Put your phone away or close your laptop, go out, breath some fresh air. This nonsense is of no concern to you.
Wait a minute, WWE already did the Battle of the Billionaires storyline like 15 years ago.
There's gonna be so many screenshots of Elon getting choked out on Twitter after this, and I for one am very excited to see that!
Two man-children enter, nobody leaves?
Two man-children enter, the doors are locked, and the building is buried.
Long live humanity.