GraniteM @ GraniteM @lemmy.world

Posts

114

Comments

1,600

Joined

2 yr. ago

A "New York minute" is defined as the time between when the light turns green and when a New York driver will honk their horn at you.

What the fuck is wrong with kids listening to their shitty parents?

/I know a lot of people get raised wrong in households that teach them wrong things and it takes a lot of effort to get better, but... it's pretty astounding to me to imagine someone listening to their parents tell them that Donald fucking Trump is a Cool Guy.

Or "Push Evangelical Theocracy"

Kirk was described by one of his peers at the Academy as "a pile of textbooks with legs."

Picard got stabbed in the heart during a game of space pool and had a laugh about it.

Kirk barely survived encountering Trelane by getting Trelane's parents involved.

Picard tangled with Q on a regular basis and continually maintained the respect and admiration of a nigh-omnipotent being.

Kirk fucked around.

Picard fucked hard.

via SMBC:

1. Tater tots are basically an entire potential meal of their own. Not a French fry, but I may actually prefer them as a possible main dish.
2. The best French fries. They are the perfect side.
3. If you want to fancy it up a bit. Suitable for formal occasions.
4. Taking the one-dimensional line of the French fry and extrapolating it out to two dimensions. Still a good ketchup conveyance, but starting to get into the issue I'm going to bring up with...

5, 6, 7. Not a good enough ratio of crispy outer fried surface to gooey potato inner. I prefer crisp, but when I bite one of these, I have a good chance of just getting a mouthful of scalding hot potato napalm, or what's worse, cold potato cement. Not ideal.

'8. Yeccch.

I don't care how you say it, I just want to know if it works, because I have been burned by these products before, Trebek!

You're correct. I'm sorry, I had my numbers screwed up in my head.

These are the numbers from Wikipedia. It still fucks me up that Trump increased his vote margins, even to the point of winning the popular vote. It's probably going to haunt me to my grave and be a thing that I deeply wish wasn't true, but there it is.

What I ought to have said was that comparing 2024 to 2016, it's not that Democratic support fell off precipitously, but rather that a lot of people showed up in 2020 to vote for Biden, and then a lot of them stayed home in 2024.

Trump gained some, and that fucking sucks, but apathy and disengagement is a big factor in what got him back in the White House.

Accurate.

Trump got about the same number of votes in 2024 as he did when he lost back in 2020, whereas Harris got fewer votes than Biden did, so strictly speaking we are getting exactly what all too many of us didn't vote for.

Wanting TWO MIDGETS SHITTING INTO A BUCKET to have A BIGGER, BLACKER DICK is woke.

You mean?

Don't forget to make the working conditions inhumane and unsafe for the workers building the place! That could probably shave off a few hours, too!

13 year old: “I'll just take the death penalty, thanks."

I've actually learned to recognize when people expect me to finish a sentence for them and then just wait for them to finish it themselves.

Them: "Hi, I'm looking for a Stephen King book, and I was wondering if you could..."

Me: "..."

Them: "..." [meaningful look]

Me: "..." [blank questioning stare]

Them: "...help me find it?"

Me: "Oh, of course! It's right this way."

It's a fun little game to play with conversational expectations.

Well, thankfully we made NASCAR stop using leaded fuel way back in [checks notes] fucking 2007?! Holeee shiiit.

You Made It Weird, with Pete Holmes. Really fucking funny comedian Pete has had lots of interesting guests. Usually starts with relatively normal stuff, but usually by the end of any given episode he gets into "Do you believe in God?", "What do you think happens when we die?", and "You ever do ayahuasca?" territory. Pete is SMART and has been going on his own spiritual and philosophical journey for a while, and it feels like every guest is another step on that journey. Look up the episode list and find someone you like and listen to their conversation.