TIL therapists diagnose your sexuality.
55 0 Reply*guy walks in the room*
Therapist: *writes GAY in their notebook, underlines it*
60 0 Reply"I know it. Your family knows it. DOGS know it!"
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Mine diagnosed me as being sexually attracted to therapists. I told them that's not a sexuality and to continue analyzing me...
12 0 ReplySo are you still seeing them?
5 0 ReplyGood old massage therapy...
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I mean yeah, he likes to have dudes suck his dick, but that doesn't make him gay, the guys sucking him are gay, duh.
33 0 ReplyBeat the guy afterwards for being a dirty homo. That way nobody will think you're gay.
19 0 Replyit's okay if you suck a little dick, as long as you don't kiss him on the lips it's fine.
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I think he's the straightest of them all. He's straight. He. Is. Straight.
Straight.
spoiler
Straight.
29 0 ReplyHe's so straight (how straight is he?) - why he's so straight that he manages to like women, even though... oh uh I mean yeah he's straight! :-P
15 0 ReplyHe's so straight he doesn't like anything with curves! Boobies? Nope. Pussy, not straight enough!
Booty? Dudes got straight, flat booty, not bad not bad. Dick? Straight as an arrow, my kinda body part!
Not gay just OCD for straight things and he just for some reason can't shake the need to put them in his mouth.
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Around here, in less politically correct times there was once a comical sketch on TV of a guy who was so straight and liked women so much that he had a sex change operation to become a woman, and thus became a lesbian woman.
That's the ultimate straight guy right there!
3 0 ReplyGhey
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Sure you are man. Sure you are. You know I thought I also experienced sexual attraction until I realized my own mother was correct that I am asexual. Welcome to the alphabet mafia (LGBTQ+ community)
15 0 ReplyI CHOOSE to drink!
12 0 ReplyAnd I can stop anytime I want to, I'm telling you! (bawls: I'm straight, I promise you I'm so straight...)
7 0 ReplyReminds me of that old post about how someone hated weed because it made them want to suck their friend's dick
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Did someone really post this? In 2024?
2 0 Replyyeah, I thought we killed satire years ago!
16 0 ReplyThe goal posts keep getting moved so much that it's a whole different sport, but some still manage to score.
3 0 ReplySatire is alive and kicking
/s
3 0 Reply
That man is a gay homosexual.
1 0 Reply