I've got a couple of days off, 2 kg of sculpting clay, and zero previous experience of sculpting. What should I make?
Lay it on me, people!
Mushrooms. The first few will probably be pretty rough, but you'll quickly start to see the possibilities with different textures, shapes, adding gills underneath, etc. If the clay is different colors you can get buck wild. After fewer than you think you'll probably be pretty good at them. You can even screw in a hook at the top and turn them into ornaments for friends and family if that's your thing.
Obviously a giant cock and balls. Start simple and add details as you go.
I see you are a man of culture as well
Aim for "A mess" and see what happens.
At last, something achievable.
Law dictates you make a bong while recreating the scene from Ghost.
However if you cannot accomplish this, an acceptable alternative is to watch S1 E19 of Community and make something alongside the students.
Can't go wrong with a nice porcelain butt plug.
Is 2kg enough? For a normal person it might be, but I'm asking for OP
640g ought to be enough for anybody
It will hint at being usable, but one should not put stuff into ones body that can break to shards.
If you want to learn, make a skull. If you want anything complete, someone suggested an ashtray and I agree.
A scale model of Devil's Tower, Wyoming. It would mean something.
An ashtray!
The biggest, flattest, thinnest sheet you can make.
Instructions unclear, clay blown away by optical radiation pressure.
Pongo.
based
Hmm, monkey.
The face of Jesus in my soup.
But I was hoping to be done with all that...
Variation: a soup bowl with a sculpted bottom so that you serve someone their soup and they slowly discover the lurking horror/humor as they eventually work their way down. Can also use for dips, nuts or small candies.
Also, we shall require pictures of your endeavors in a couple of days.
an obelisk
A soup bowl with phone stand, chopstick holder and spoon holder. Maybe even add a handle to grab it, when it's too hot. The ultimate bowl.
Make a diorama of kids getting mauled by bears because they made fun of that bald guy in the Bible.
As long as you Ghost it doesn’t matter.
Snakes: Easy Street.
Dickbutt!
Throw the clay as hard as you can up against a wall and if it sticks ... place a little artist signature just below it and paint a frame around it
The TARDIS, outside AND inside, even though its bigger on the inside....
: P
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Seriously, though, Betty Edwards' "Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain, the 4th Definitive Edition", would be a major augmentation of your exploring, and faces are what most people are wired-for best.
( I'm face-blind: I didn't know ANYONE could identify another person by their face, until I was in my 30's or 40's, & read about that.
I've always used context+way-of-moving+how-the-sound+clothing+etc to figure it out )
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Adam Smasher vs Scott Pilgrim.
A layer completely covering yourself. Once baked, this will preserve valuable ethnographic information for future archeologists. /s
Too soon?
A self-portrait. If it turns out unrecognizable, just move the goalposts and tell the viewer that it's a depiction of their mum.
Oil lamps are not very complicated to make. And could be useful.
a tardigrade sitting like buddha
This... sounds kinda awesome.
What's it sitting on? A copepod maybe?