Smart ass

6yo DM: “You encounter a corpse wearing a ring of jumping.”

Those scrolls are unironically crucial for the speedrun.
- For those who don't know, there was an event in Morrowind where you found a corpse carrying three scrolls of "Icarian Flight" (if you were in the right place at the right time you'd actually see him hit the ground). The way the scrolls worked was they buffed your Acrobatics skill by 1000 (in a 1-100 system) allowing you to soar across the entire map in one bound... but the duration on the buff was shorter than the time it took to land, and your ability to absorb fall damage was also controlled by your Acrobatics skill. So unsuspecting players would try one of the scrolls and suffer exactly the same fate.
  The genius was that these items weren't actually useless; there were two ways to use them effectively. The first was to simply cast a second scroll right before you landed. The second was to have a spell, scroll or item that granted levitation; by casting it right before landing you could simply negate the fall damage and drift to earth safely. A famous speedrun used both methods, along with another trap item, The Boots of Blinding Speed; they made you incredibly fast. And blind.

Every Morrowind player learned this lesson early on.

Technically the problem there is the effect of that scroll wears off before you hit the ground.
- Tarhiel was carrying three other scrolls, so he may have planned ahead with one for the jump and one for the landing each time and just didn't manage to use one of them. Though that raises the question of why he'd use a presumably very valuable prototype scroll instead of just using Potions of Slowfalling or Scrolls of Tinur's Hoptoad.

I once ran a game of Paranoia in which I gave one of my players an anti-gravity belt. It was not, however, an anti-inertia belt.

Fuck I want to play paranoia so bad
- But you're already playing...
Hehehe there's a suspensor belt in Dune Awakening that does this.
So long as you activate it before you really pick up speed you'll be ok.
I'd be more afraid of an anti-gravity belt that is an anti-inertia belt. It would reverse gravity, which would normally cause you to fall up, except it also reverses your inertia so you still go down. But if you push on the floor, the floor will push back up on you, which will cause you to accelerate towards the floor. You'd probably end up fused into it.
I'm really not seeing how one that isn't an anti-inertia belt is a problem, besides breaking general relativity. If you turn the anti-gravity way up the acceleration could kill you, but I'd think of that as too much anti-gravity instead of lack of inertial dampening.
- I think its not about reversing the direction of inertia but more of a "you keep your speed when activating/deactivating the belt, just in the other direction". You can't use it to cancel fall damage by reversing gravity for 0.1sec before touching the ground because you also reverse your falling speed when you reverse gravity.
Are you complaining about issues with the perfect products of the Alpha Complex' finest R&D department, troubleshooter?
Fortunately air resistance is a thing, so you don't fly off into space

https://en.uesp.net/wiki/Morrowind:Tarhiel

I mean it makes sense. If your legs were able to propel you that far but you lacked the skill to use it and faceplanted on landing, it’s gonna hurt. You could at least try to add a skill check for how well you land.

On god

At three a lot of 6 year olds playing D&D??

Yeah, that seems a bit young to me. My mom introduced me to it at a relatively young age, but I'm pretty sure I was older than six.

The player just sounds both thick and entitled here tbh. They could have rigged a hook or something to grab the ladder but just expected someone else to figure it all out for them.