I'm jealous

It probably feels a lot more like this

Contrary to what you may believe, you don't have to envy these vegetables and can indeed take a shower yourself.

Thats a misting not a shower tho. Also those veggies aint paying for that water.
Yeah but I’ll never feel as good as those vegetables.
- You mean cut and dead?

Peppers and cucumbers are the traumatic forced abortions of the plant world. Broccoli and cauliflower are the amputated sex organs of the plants that were cut from their bodies. Celery, brussel sprouts, and artichokes are severed limbs of plants. This is a literal mass grave of dead and dying vegetation, an alter to the horrific mutilation and abuse perpetrated on an entire kingdom of life by humans. A final act of humiliation before we condemn them to the hell of cooking and consumption. I doubt the spray mist provides much comfort.

More meat it is then. Save the vegetables!
- I'm not vegetarian because I like animals. I'm vegetarian because I hate plants.
Guess I'll just eat rocks then ¯(ツ)/¯
- Oh sure. They’ve spend millions of years sedimenting to form or metamorphasizing in the warm molten bosom of Mother Earth, just so you can selfishly stuff your gob with their crunchy goodness. I hope you are happy with yourself.
- Scientists have determined that rocks have souls. This revelation came on the heels of the discovery last month that souls definitely exist.
  The only ethical move is to starve.
  On a more serious note, plants communicate with each other through the plant version of pheromones, and some utilize an underground internet / postal service of sorts made of fungi mycelium called a mycelial network. They can even use this network to pass nutrients to plants that are in need.
- They're minerals, Grostleton.
Awesome! I'ma start a death metal band and put celery and brussel sprouts on the album covers.
Track 1: "I will Eat your Artichoke!"
Track 2: "Your Chopped Broccoli Falling on the Floor"
Track 3: "Sliced Cucumber"
etc
- Not metal, but here's some Vegetable Soul: https://youtube.com/watch?v=IKQjHwVc8b0
You should hang out by the veggie tray at parties.
- That's how I met my partner. We both love dips. We could talk or not talk about dips all day long and then do it again tomorrow.
That’s fucking metal
- No, THIS is fucking metal!
There is a religion called Jainism that actually tries to avoid harming even tiny organisms and plants. As such they avoid eating things like root vegetables that require the entire plant to be killed in order to harvest them.
Interestingly they are not necessarily against drinking milk, as milking an animal is viewed similarly to harvesting a fruit. Though its my understanding that they may still object to industrial milk production.
- In traditional agriculture, you just feed, house and care for an animal, and when its young stops drinking milk, you keep milking the mother so it doesn't stop making milk.
  I can't see any suffering in that.
  Industrialized milk production is a complete perversion of that. It's what happens when you take a symbiotic relationship and add Capitalism.
DOOM music intensifies
Fuck you vegetables, you little delicious motherfuckers. I will eat your dicks and corpses.

we had these 20 years ago in my country. but these got removed because they create bacteria and lower shelf life by a lot. nothing good about them at all. just extra cost and work.

Was wondering why we don't have this in Europe, and the answer is once again, common fucking sense.
- I've seen them last year in france at some places unfortunately.
what a loss for vegetable welfare

Be the vegetable you want to be

OK

Dead vegetable reproductive organs.

I've been on some patios in the summer that actually do this. It does feel very good.

As a child I used to be borderline obsessed with the misters and the overall smell and vibe of the produce sections. Always told my mom I wanted to work in one. Thirty years later, purely by circumstance, I manage one for a living. It's not quite what I dreamed of, given that stores in 2025 are no longer poorly lit nor smell like mothballs and old air conditioning/refrigerant, but I still enjoy my career.

I don't think you need to be a vegetable to enjoy a nice mist.

Seems like a complete flip to what we have here in the UK, Aldi is by far cheaper than any farmers market I have seen.
- There's a big difference between a farm stand and a farmers market.
- In the US a “farmers market” typically means that a city or town shuts down a few streets and farmers come from their rural farms to the city center to sell their produce. The prices can trend high, because the focus tends to be on quality and known provenence.
  What the parent poster is describing is not farmers markets, but farm stands. You have to go to them instead of them coming to you, which is where the savings come from. It might not be worth it depending on the value of your time.
- Same here, and those Aldi cucumbers are like 1,50€ or a little more.
We have a huge Farmers Market open Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays. Its about 10 minutes from my home. Really good deals on fruits, vegetable & baked goods. The deals are even better if you show up about an hour before closing. In today's economy you have to watch every penny spent.
- And later in the summer you can find pick up trucks parked at the side of the road offering sweet corn for far less than you would ever be able to get at a grocery store

As a young adult of the 90's all I see here is Legionnaire's disease.

It has to be sat for a while, outside of certain temperatures, for that.

Produce was my first job and we used to come in at 5am and clean these occasionally. They get jelly dangly bits hanging from below the veggies that you just spray off and then wash. It was an interesting event.

I don't think you would feel that much being a vegetable, but since no person has ever come back from the vegetable state you just can't tell.

https://listverse.com/2015/01/10/10-amazing-stories-of-people-who-woke-up-from-comas/
Sure people have.
- I think a coma is distinct from a vegetative state. If I'm remembering correctly, a vegetative state involves some disease or injury that has done permanent damage in a way that the person involved will never "wake up".

The cutting your legs off for display part?

Spritz me harder daddy

It’s quite warm in the north east of the U.K. at the minute, please do this to me.

Another terrifying british 24°C heat wave?
- Yep. I like 12 degrees C with a decent chance of rain.