Megachurch Conducts Successful Nuclear Missile Test
Megachurch Conducts Successful Nuclear Missile Test
www.theonion.com
Megachurch Conducts Successful Nuclear Missile Test
22 comments
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This is one of those "Oh that's so crazy. That would never happen in the real world."
And then ten years later some American court rules that their right to bear arms and "one nation under god" extends to nuclear warheads.
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Existence of a privately owned nuke is a security hazard of all sorts, no country would accept this.
Though illegal means exist, and I heavily think there's a billionaire out there that has a nuke in one of their displays for lols through it.
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God: Makes everyone keep waiting for Armageddon.
American Evangelicals: I'll do it myself.
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I'll make my own Armageddon, which blackjack, and hookers!
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I mean, that's quite literally happening, more or less. Check out the documentary Praying for Armageddon if you can find it.
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When they switch over from "God works in mysterious ways" to "God works through us"
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In the mid 90s the Japanese Aum Shinrikyo cult were producing chemical weapons which were used in a deadly sarin gas attack on the Tokyo subway. Prior to the attack Aum briefly owned a million acre cattle ranch in Australia where they tested sarin and may have tried to mine uranium ore.
Several nuclear powers are run by autocratic theocracies/cults and the US could be heading in that direction.
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Well THAT'S going in the DnD ideas folder.
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Too real.
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Pretty soon it will be
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That was the most horrifying thing I’ve ever read before realizing it was the onion.
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Please don't give them any ideas
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North Korea mad in jealously
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50 kiloton thermonuclear? That's a fizzle folks. They don't know how to handle their plutonium. Fake news. It was just a simple fission bomb with some wasted fusion fuel.
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Jonestown Fallout
22 comments
That 0.5 second moment where I read the title before realising it is the onion 😳😳
Aren't these 0.5 seconds the moments we live for?
There was just an NCD post about the Mormon Industrial Complex yesterday, so in this specific case, no.
Went through the same rainbow of emotions. Well done Onion.