Meet my new puppy: Ass!

Cum.

I had to jerk off before posting just to make this comment true.

Taquito

Fits pretty well if you ask me...

Cheese Stick ain't a terrible name tho

Ibuprofen

Wood glue.

My left leg.

(If somebody could come get me off this desert island that’d be great)

Puppy

Richard!

Banh mi

Puppy 🗿

Totino's Pizza Rolls

Ass

Cock

Kefir

Technically I drank it but it was thick so it was my meal

Pancake

Brownie

Tripple Choco Cookie.

It was back last August, so... does Ensure count?

Also, I knew a guy who had a little yippy dog named Mr. President. Best dog name ever.

Croquette and I think it's a great name

Richard.

Chewy (type of compliments granola bar)

Toast

Wasabi Pea no peeing inside!

Bosco stick, I guess "Bosco" isn't a bad name for a pup.

Potato!

Sprout

Waffles. But my roommate in college bought a puppy before the summer, named it Waffles, took her home, and came back in the fall with an untrained dog that peed in the house and he never cleaned it up. Poor Waffles, she didn't ask to be raised by terrible owners but I ended up moving out early because of her.

Ciabatta with sweet potato madras spread, green olives, feta, and Dutch cheese. Rolls off the tongue

Taco 🌮

Chips and queso

My girlfriends ass?

Carbonara

Cimmanim Roll!

C A K E

Phò Gâu

Katsu

Happy with that!

Phat bitch dip: 2 blocks cream cheese 3 cans of shredded chicken drained 5 diced jalapeños Siracha to taste Shredded cheddar

Microwave cream cheese till soft. Mix in chicken, jalapeños, and Siracha. Put in a casserole dish and top with shredded cheese. Bake @ 350f for 10 minutes or until cheese is melted

Edit: Phat is 80s slang for 'Pretty hot and tempting'

Actually, Alfredo is an amazing name for that little goi

Chicken caesar wrap

My little sweet gummy bear

Veggie Burger.

Ice cream with big juicy balls

Cacio E Pepe

Maki

Chickpea <3

Soy milk

Hello Fruit Snack!

Schoggigipfeli

Hotdog

Burger

Rex. That's a coincidence, that was my neighbour's dog's name. Shame what happened to him, he was always so friendly. Tasty too

Tomato

Popcorn

Emmi Energy Milk High Protein Double Zero Ananas-Kokos

Enchilada.

Perfect.

Ramen

soy milk

(kinda fitting actually)

Fist full of granola

Or Fist for short

Long ago I had this one cat named Birria, because I used to jokingly tell her mother "If you don't behave, I'm going to make birria tacos out of you!"

When I rescued her mom, I thought she was a male, still quite young, and before I'd found a vet she disappeared for a couple of days and came back pregnant. After that, she and every cat I've had since then, male or female, I've taken to the vet to be neutered or spayed before anybody gets knocked up.