Before bottom surgery my friends made me a penis cake and we performed surgery upon it as we sliced. It was even filled with raspberry jelly "blood".

A little later than a transition party, but it was so sweet of them.

Oopsie. Well I guess that's why pencils have erasers. As long as we've learned our lesson about funneling massive amounts of money and arms to questionable militias, we should be fine.

Or knowing that you can invade Libya in a pinch.

I knew someone who lived next to a hobby farm that would just keep a few cows. Whenever they sold one, the cows that were left behind would just moo out for the missing one days. It sucked.