I haven't yet, but yes thrifting will definitely be on the menu! Right now I'm trying to think through how I'm going to craft a couple of the pieces I aim to make and was hoping to find some costume specific sites to draw inspo from (and to start browsing for a wig and accessories.) There's just so many niche webstores selling junk product that my eyes were starting to cross.
oh wow, this looks great! Thank you for the recc!
My city used to have a great costume & theater supply shop, but it went under several years back. I’m trying to work out ideas for a Halloween costume, but I’m struggling to think of a good e-comm site for such things (better quality than your Spirit Halloween type places.)
I’ve already been surfing etsy, amazon, etc, but I’m hoping to find a niche vendor. Googling for costume sites brings up a ton of stuff, and I’m hoping to cut through the cheap party shop type places. Any recommendations are appreciated!
Tell me more!
Seconding this interest in seeing that feature added!
Love is a verb. Someone told me this years ago and it stuck. You can apply it in the most literal sense in your romantic relationships, familial, and friendships. You can also use the less mushy (and inverse) version “Watch their feet, not their mouthes” in working relationships and more casual acquaintances. The point is, prioritize demonstrating your care for others over expressing it verbally, and evaluate others’ care for you (or for a project, solving a problem, etc.) based on their actual efforts instead of what they say.
Thank you! That genuinely makes me feel a little better
Well, to answer your question, I have to talk to them. Very small team, this lady seems to think she’s in charge of the whole team instead of her two direct reports. Heres more context from upthread: https://beehaw.org/comment/973873
But you are right about reaffirming of boundaries. I think I get scared when pushing back because I’m not always great at regulating my emotions so I’m terrified I’ll get worked up and say the wrong thing, but I really need to work on this skill. It’s important, I do not want to be someone easily steamrolled.
A+ advice. I was not taught great conflict resolution skills as a kid and have some neurospiciness that makes regulation challenging at times, but my meds help and I think I’m better equipped emotionally these days than I tend to think of myself as or give myself credit for. Thank you for the advice, this is all A+ insight.
I can absolutely relate to this! Thank you for your perspective!
These links are excellent! Thank you!
This hits close to home. When I was candid about the fact that it took some courage to speak up about something that needed pushing back on, I got called a “scaredy cat” 🙄
Great advice
Thank you!
But I’m very sociable amd not shy with conversation!
I am the “averse” one- meaning, I have a hard time setting firm boundaries, struggle with gathering the courage to say no, etc. The person in question I’m having to push back against is kind of passive aggressive/manipulative, but seems very confrontational.
So I already pushed back on some of her unreasonable demands already, and essentially I’m trying to ready myself for more little skirmishes even though it scares the shit out of me. My boss has assured me she has no authority over me and the org chart shows that plain as day, I’m just not used to telling someone who is technically higher ranking than me no in polite and tactful ways when appropriate. This team has been such smooth sailing (interpersonally) up until now.
Mostly a new manager on our team causing issues (not my manager, half our team is her side of the org chart, my half of the team is a different skillset & manager.) She is not my bosses boss either. For some reason she is convinced she is both of those (boss of the whole team.) For context this is a very small team with full time focus on a special subsidiary co of one if my employer’s main clients. We are six people total, so theres no avoiding her. The rest of us do have and have always had a great dynamic and working relationship, but this woman respects nothing but the sound of her own voice, has no idea how to listen or compromise, doesn’t know wtf she’s doing, and thinks she’s going to bully everyone into doing things her way regardless.
If she has any experience in our industry, its very outdated. This does not stop her from being convinced she knows better on how this team works than all of us who’ve been on it for over a year. Lots of weird petty authoritarian control issues. Fixating on tardiness (its not a formal policy, but we work in a “younger” field and have always operated on a “as long as your deadlines are met, nobody cares if you’re running late” policy. This has become a whole crusade for her.
We have a short daily status call and try to all meet in person for it every Wednesday. She tried to insist these calls need to be in person everyday were in office (we hybrid.) Weve already pushed back on it, now she’s insisting these calls become video conferences 🙄 presumably so she can confirm we’re all at our desks on time.
Trying to make a lot of arbitrary (and sometimes counter productive) changes to processes shes not involved in, signing my half of the team up for ad hoc special projects from other teams for brownie points for herself, etc.
None of this would be so terrible if my actual boss weren’t utterly paralyzed by confrontation. He claims he’s biding his time until she really steps out of line, but I think he just has no back bone. Confronting authority figures (actual or imaginary as in this case she’s not my real boss) is stressful to me, but once I initially broach the topic, I do okay and keep it professional/constructive, so I’m trying to pick my battles because we’re all sick of being bullied by this idiot and I’m tired of waiting on my boss tk say something.
This one pops into my head way too often
Surprised good sense of humor or wit aren’t on here yet. Playfully sparring with someone or laughing until it hurts when you hang around a person are a turn on.
Hi lemmy, this situation is kinda private so it seems easier to look for support here than it is to talk about it with most of my irl friends.
My partner is going into GI surgery in about 36 hours. We’ve been together for nearly 5 years and cohabitate, and he has a chronic GI condition that has worsened in the past couple years. He normally manages it with medication, but his flareups have gotten frequent and severe enough that he’s finally committed to surgical correction. As far as I know it’s not going to cure anything, but should hopefully make his condition more easily managed.
This of course is scary, so I’ve already got fears about what could go wrong and the possibility of something bad happening. I’m sure he does too, and he was very crabby this morning and picked a fight. I suspect it was in response to his anxiety, but he’s stubborn and has kind of doubled down on being petty and spiteful tonight. I will admit that this morning when he was being antagonistic, I let it get under my skin and blew my top back at him some and boy is he holding it against me now. I’m so embarrassed that I acted nasty this morning and have tried to mend the bad feelings with zero success. He’s gone so far as to say he plans to go to his mother’s tomorrow and have her drive him to/from the procedure and plans to spend his recovery time (1-2 weeks) at mom’s. That one hurt, the idea of not being able to see him off sucks.
I’m trying to just give him space tonight, but I have to admit that the fact that he won’t drop it and that it seems like he may huff off into this procedure is really making my preexisting anxieties about this worse. What if something happens to him and he passes away in the middle of all this tension between us? Ugh, the thought makes my stomach turn.
I know there’s no good answer here and I’m not trying to demonize him, he’s a great man that just isn’t very emotionally self aware sometimes, but I feel stuck crying on our couch terrified. (I let him have the bedroom because I know he needs to be resting and I’m gonna be up and about for a bit.) If you have any advice, memes, good vibes, or encouraging stats about diverticulitis surgery, please share. My little brother talked me down some on the phone, but I’m too embarrassed about the fight to call my friends, so here I am, sadgirling on lemmy.
In the boiling chaos of reddit over the last few days, I scrolled past some allegations that I didn’t have a chance to thoroughly look into before today’s start to the blackout.
IIRC, if was something to do with a connection between Lemmy’s creator (or maybe the fediverse at large?) and neo nazi/white nationalist ideology, but that’s all I remember off the top of my head. I couldn’t tell at the time if it was just a loyal redditor’s sour grapes, ragebait, or if it had something to it.
Obviously, I’m not going back over to reddit right now to find the thread, and a web search is mostly pulling articles about Motorhead’s Lemmy, lol. Does anyone have any info on this or an idea if why this might have been passed around? I’m new to lemmy, so I don’t know much of the backstory on the page.