Wunderbar!

Cool, I learned a Spanish word today!

... they sometimes turn away in the middle of smiling at you because they're so overwhelmed by joy they can't handle all the emotion and have to regulate like Warren G and Nate Dogg.

"My god! What did you get?"

"Uncle John's Bathroom Reader."

Thank goodness, an original joke instead of another re-tread.

Utopia Planitia looks more rustic than I thought it'd be!

You have been poisoned.

The real problem is once you get a taste for it, only 1,000 year old bottles will do.

"Alright app, summarize Matthew 5:38-40 for me."

"It is unwise to respond to violence with violence because it may lead to an endless cycle of retaliation."

"Hey, this thing is BROKEN!"

I don't have a problem with simplified versions of texts -- archaic language, ornamented prose, and obsolete cultural references shouldn't stand in the way of someone having access to the ideas contained in great literature. But I like it when people do the simplifying--like "Reader's Digest" versions, or Cliff's Notes, or whatever. It's a skilled profession that already doesn't get the credit it deserves, and I worry AI will eclipse human work with voluminous inferior results.

Two monks were passing by a little pond where there were some ducks, and the first monk said, "Look at how happy those ducks are!"

The second monk said, "You are not a duck. You can't know if they are happy."

The first monk replied, "You are not me. You can't know that I cannot."

Look, I don't make the rules.

Just the signs 😉

"Pure Energy"

"What are you going to do, send me to super Hell?"

"Very well then. Right this way, sir."

Strange -- could've sworn I planted a DOGwood tree.

Or three!

Wait, I thought lances beat swords, and swords beat axes?

"How do you think that Rob Zombie got all of the rights to all of these different movies to use on the album? I mean, it's like one for every song! Does he have a Getty Images account? A family member in the industry?"

"Tuvok, Neelix, Eddie Brock, and symbiote, please report to Transporter Room 1."