Image description: 1 Waiter: Any room for dessert Mr. Banner? 2 Bruce Banner: I really wanted some but I'm way too full. This makes me so mad. 3 Bruce turns into the hulk 4 Hulk: I'll have the tiramisu.
--- (Originally published on mstdn.social: 2024-03-06) - Click the Fedi-Link to visit.
Image description: 1 Person with little girl rings bell: Every time a bell rings an angel gets his wings. 2 Angel in heaven: My wings! This is the best day ever! 3 Girl takes bell and furiously rings it: I love you angel! 4 Angel, with dozens of wings protruding out of his body: The pain!
--- (Originally published on mstdn.social: 2024-02-25)
Tony Hawk: I'd like to turn myself in for murder.
Cop: Are you Tony Hawk?
Tony Hawk: Yes.
Cop: If you're Tony Hawk where's your skateboard?
Tony Hawk, holding up a blood-soaked skateboard: It dug right into his skull. I am a monster
Cop: You look a little old to be Tony Hawk
---
(Originally published on mstdn.social: 2024-01-23)
Image transcription: In 2019 J. K. Rowling announced that Hagrid had a foot fetish.
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(Originally published earlier today on mstdn.social)
That's, so interesting.
Image transcription: In the English language, you can use a comma, anywhere, in a sentence, and it, will still be, grammatically, correct,.
(Originally published a few hours ago on mstdn)
I once slept for 11 hours and when I woke up my cats looked extremely disappointed that they wouldn't get to devour me.
Image transcription: Studies have shown that cats would eat their owners if they slept for 12 hours straight.
(Originally published a few hours ago on mstdn)
That's terrifying.
Image transcription: Sleep paralysis occurs when the bacteria living in your brain gain temporary control over your motor functions.
(Originally published a few hours ago on mstdn)
That's a cool feature.
Image transcription: If you swipe up with two fingers on someone’s Tinder profile it will reveal if they have a criminal record.
(Originally published on mstdn: 2024-02-04)
Image transcription: The most expensive pizza in the world costs $20,000. It is topped with pepperoni, sausage and a baseball that has been autographed by Babe Ruth.
(Originally published on mstdn.social: 2024-01-12)
That's so interesting.
Image transcription: Charlton Heston was not allowed to be an organ donor because his body legally belonged to the NRA.
(Originally published a few hours ago on mstdn)
Image transcription: Keanu Reeves claims that he has aged so gracefully because he refuses to acknowledge his birthday every year.
(Originally published a few hours ago on mstdn)
Image transcription: Due to the placebo effect, an amputee will regrow lost limbs if you give them a sugar pill and tell them that it is a scientific breakthrough in regenerative medicine.
Image transcription: ADHD stands for "Always Doing Home Decorating".
Image transcription: The FDA, which stands for the Food in Drugs Administration, is responsible for putting food in all of the drugs.
I wouldn't have been able to resist that temptation either.
Image transcription: The forbidden fruit in the Garden of Eden was a coconut.
Image transcription: When Jeff Bezos found out that many of his employees had to take the bus to work, he bought the bus company and raised ticket prices.
Image transcription: Microscope goggles were invented in 2011, which allowed people to see every single germ in their field of vision. The product was quickly discontinued because everyone who wore them went insane.
Well that's depressing.
Image transcription: Humans laugh less as they age, and lose the ability to laugh entirely at the age of 84.
Image transcription: The most commonly used password is "yumyumpancakes69".
Low Quality Facts @mstdn.social Low Quality Facts written in arguably lower quality handwriting.