ethaver @ ethaver @kbin.earth

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makes it worse for facial hair. Electrolysis is the only way.

the clitoral growth would be the main target unfortunately; I suspect being smaller than average even for a cis female is a contributing factor to an(/hypo)orgasmia. The psych meds also aren't helping but–

I wish I could clone you – <3, an inpatient psych nurse.

seems like a lot lol. idk how much people would care either.

Because it turns out I don't actually want facial hair and I can't undo that easily / cheaply so now I'm stuck with weird little patches on the side of my chin that I'm constantly scratching open when I forget to keep them plucked. Now, I'm still considering doing the rest of the hormone course, I just also keep in mind that I might have to plan for electrolysis concurrently. It turns out making permanent changes to your body is actually something to ponder for a second.

yes the boredom will be the biggest problem and likely no electronics will be allowed. get a few good paperback books, a good puzzle book with some more variety than just word searches / sudokus, and bring a non-spiral bound sketchbook and some crayons (all psych wards will pretty much universally allow crayons vs if they're acute enough they may worry about hard plastics, but admittedly that level of acuity is somewhat rare) and practice your figure or still life drawing or just have fun scribbling if you like. also a great time to pick up origami as a hobby. If you ask nicely they will almost definitely play music for you but it might be in a group setting where you have to rotate choosing with the other patients.

hi I've been working inpatient psych for almost a decade, ama! lol.

6-lobe tamper is great for acute psychiatry and corrections where you're dealing with violent and self injurious behavior. You don't want people pulling screws out to make shivs / lockpicks / things to slit their wrists with or pulling utility plates off the wall to access wiring for fire setting or expose studs or plumbing to anchor a noose on. It's a lot harder to improvise a tool to remove a 6-lobe than it is a flat or even a Phillips.

any new power structure can be good for the time it takes a generation to pass. after that people forget why they designed something a certain way and lose engagement with the political process. the only political and economic system that will ever be functional is one that is fundamentally founded on educating the populace on both their right and their responsibility to be involved in their own governance. the right to bear arms was a prototypical move to ensure people would always be able to enforce their right to self governance but without education in the importance of actually doing so it has ultimately failed to fulfill that purpose.

there's already a !bestofredditorupdates@lemmit.online but a lot of instances block lemmit for being bot content since their whole purpose is to repost reddit content which like. bots are actually super useful for that kind of thing. A LOT of users don't seem to understand that they personally have the power to set instance blocks for their own account. so instead they push for defeds when like. just block the instance from your settings. it's a checkbox. it's not complicated! Sometimes I worry that all the defeds will create little insular echo chambers when the whole point of fedi is diversity.

Abilify is a beautiful long term maintenance med but wholly inappropriate for an acutely agitated and combative patient.

also there are some moments where I genuinely empathize a LOT with Inuyasha. One of the episodes I like is Fateful Night in Togenkyo and he's just like "uuuuh no I need to go find somewhere to hole up" then "ok well we're getting this shit over with before the sun comes up goes down" then "fuck fuck fuck ok, I've got a plan though" to "I have no idea what's going on but this dude is weird AF-wait are those... her clothes? ...none of those possibilities are good" "OK she's alive and doesn't look... hurt. ok lets get out of here alive" "WHY DO PEOPLE KEEP STABBING ME AND WHY IS SHE STILL TALKING SHIT????" "Ok there's the sun, fucking finally! THANK YOU UNIVERSE-" like they got him down good and they're still kicking but so is he! I can get behind that. #anime #inuyasha

here's a markdown formatted quit plan for your notes app (based on this) with bullets for common answers to the questions that you can delete if they don't apply / keep or add ones that do.

    
# Quit Plan

---

## Quit Date
_Choose a date within the next two weeks._

**Quit Date:** [YYYY-MM-DD]

**What to expect**
- **1 week:** Nicotine is out of your system  
- **2 weeks:** Physical withdrawal symptoms fade  
- **1 month:** Habit- and emotion-driven cravings may continue  

---

## Reasons for Quitting

- Feel healthier / Live longer
- Save Money
- See my kids grow up / set a better example
- Look healthier / smell better
- Reduce stress between uses


---

## Triggers
_Knowing your triggers helps you plan around them._

### Emotional
- Feeling stressed
- Feeling anxious
- Feeling down
- Feeling lonely
- Feeling bored
- After conflict

### Situational
- Talking on the phone
- Drinking alcohol
- Watching TV
- Driving
- Finishing a meal
- Drinking coffee
- Work breaks
- After sex

### Social / Environmental
- Bars or parties
- Social events
- Seeing someone else smoke

---

## Coping Strategies

### If your hands or mouth need something to do
- Hold a straw or pen and focus on breathing
- Fidget with a coin or paperclip

### If you use tobacco to manage stress or mood
- Slow breathing or short bursts of exercise
- Talk it out with someone you trust

### If boredom or restlessness is the problem
_Keep a short “craving list”:_
  - [TASK]
  - [TASK]
  - [TASK]

### If you feel irritable or anxious without nicotine
- Consider nicotine replacement (patch, gum, lozenge)

### If you used tobacco for energy
- Light exercise
- Regular meals and healthy snacks
- Adequate sleep

### If you used tobacco for pleasure or relaxation
_Substitute another reward:_
  - Music
  - Movies
  - Saving money for something specific

---

## Remove Reminders
_(Before Quit Day)_
- Wash clothes that smell like smoke
- Clean your car
- Discard tobacco, lighters, ashtrays
- Place coping tools where tobacco used to be

---

## Support (Optional)
_Quitting is easier with backup._
- [NAME / ROLE]
- [NAME / ROLE]

---

## Personal Notes


  

...and if you're a transgirl I'd like to add to your reasons list that estrogen + smoking significantly increases the coagulability of your blood. I've had several transgirl patients with DVTs / PEs / strokes even who did not know that can happen!

Almost every other animal dies pretty quickly after having their last round of children / losing fertility, but humans live almost twice as long. Elders have a literal hardcoded purpose in human evolution.

better than 66

I'm using owncloud for that but (don't hate me) I'm having to use chatgpt a LOT for the initial configuration. There's a lot of stuff I'm having to learn to get back into it and it's really good at searching docs by fuzzy match, pointing out what part of a function block isn't working, and drafting individual function blocks to experiment with (I'll comment out the original, paste in the chatgpt one, test it, etc). It's a much better experience than a decade ago and I haven't gotten emotionally abused by a more experienced person on stack overflow or reddit once yet.

I've got owncloud running as a lan only service so it just auto syncs my calendar, contacts, and a few folders of documents / pictures I like to keep with me but only whenever I'm home. Right now I'm just also configuring the same old computer to do some basic media / retro gaming on the TV and the hard part right now is configuring magic mirror as it's idle display to keep hubs and I straight on our calendars and tasks (and show some family photos). Nothing major just as I get back onto Linux after ten years it's nice to not get called lazy and stupid while I'm learning.

no but the above is what I tell my coworkers when they ask why so many of our trans patients act cluster b AF. It's partly because our sample, being inpatient, is gonna have a higher incidence overall, but it's also because that constellation of behaviors is caused by a very specific type of relatively lowkey but super chronic trauma that's unfortunately common for that population to be exposed to.

a lot of people don't wanna have this discussion because at face value it reads too much like saying being trans is a mental illness but

the #1 predictor of the development of a cluster b personality disorder (such as borderline, which is famous for this kind of behavior) is a consistently inconsistent pattern of emotional invalidation throughout early and middle childhood. So there are times where mom / dad / primary caregiver said "oh no! that's terrible. Here's how I deal with being upset by that" but there were other times they were like "no that's dumb and weird nobody normal feels like that you should just stop feeling that way." and that pattern continues on-and-off some things being validated some things not being validated over that extended period.

...and that basically just describes the experience of being being raised in a social environment that's hostile to their lived experiences as a trans child. That plus all the community elders getting picked off by AIDS means there's limited healthy emotional adjustment within the lgbt subculture as well.

TLDR - no shit they all act fucking feral there's a massive shortage of healthy and supportive social structures.

.