betterdeadthanreddit @ betterdeadthanreddit @lemmy.world

An early bird in the hand gets the low hanging fruit in the bush.

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He'd cheat.

Color and armor don't contain a "u" over here either.

"It hic-, it duzzint count if I don' remember making the hic-, the ruling!"

Brett "I like beer and raping" Kavanaugh

Yet. Be the something or whatever.

Hobbies come and go. Shiny exciting thing stopped being shiny and exciting and now it's just a thing you're paying the bills for until you admit you've moved on.

Not sure if you're using a speech-to-text thing that chose the wrong homophone but "illicit" and "elicit" have different meanings. If something is illicit, it's against the rules. Something elicited is brought forth.

I associate "illicit" with "illegal" and "elicit" with "evoke" and, even if it's not an exact match for both meanings, it's close enough to get to the right one.

When he's not fucking kids one way, he's fucking them another.

I've tried this, people tend to catch on by the fifth or sixth trimester. The scruffy-looking beard probably didn't help me sell it though.

He didn't go quite that far but that'd be one way to definitively end it.

If she's having an open casket funeral, whoever's doing her makeup has the opportunity to do something very funny.

Good responses here already, just wanted to try and address the airbag concerns a little. The National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (part of the US Department of Transportation) has a page about them here but I'll pull some quotes:

(From the section about on/off switches)

There are few circumstances under which the risk of sitting in front of an active frontal air bag outweigh the safety benefits... [e.g.] A driver must sit within a few inches of the air bag, typically because she or he is of extremely small stature (i.e., 4 feet 6 inches or less).

(In the FAQ)

To minimize the potential of any air-bag-related injury, NHTSA still recommends keeping a 10-inch minimum between the air bag cover (in the center of the steering wheel for drivers and on the dashboard for the right front passenger) [and the driver's breastbone]

Maybe going out with a ruler / tape measure to see how much distance you have to work with will provide a little peace of mind. On the other hand, if you are short enough to qualify for the on/off switch exception (more info on the page linked above), that's something else to consider. If you're outside the USA, check your local laws to see if they have restrictions on airbag toggle switches and, if so, a way to get an exception similar to what's described by the NHTSA.

Agree. Clanker punks fuck off.

What's some cool stuff to visit in China that isn't close to (or is upwind of) military installations or industrial centers? Asking for several thousand friends.

Why? I can watch movies at home for less and have playback/volume control.

Onion and un-young.

I can't stand his open-mouthed idiot stare, no idea how he got picked to host a TV show. The only time he should be in front of a camera is for a perp walk when they match up items in his trophy collection to a couple dozen missing persons cases.

Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? They worked it out with a pencil.

First, you get a very long funnel...