“hmm, you said all right words but this seems a bit too convenient or neat and they suspect you have an ulterior motive”

Haha, I know this one. xD Used it as well, it just feels old after a while, and I dont feel well with having to shoot down a cool line juest because the dice said so. On the other hand, there are players, who could be upset by this, because they are less sociable, and rely on their charisma/whatever rolls to get the argument done, so roll then go feels more fair overall.

Yeah, I get this, people are just being forced into certain habits by their first system (typically DnD nowadays), and its hard to set them free from them. I needed years to get rid of the gamey approach towards ttrpgs, but I believe as the time flies by people just get bored by goblin slaying and realise there are more to this rpg stuff.

As for systems, I can strongly recommend a PbtA based game, City of Mists. It gives players a lot of control over their own actions, its kind of a superhero setting, and its very generic, so you can introduce your team into it woithout problems, you can adapt any major superhero setting they like, so they feel faimliar with it. Sessions come off like episodes of a superhero show, and I think its really cool.

I agree that Go then Roll is more typical, its mostly like that at my table and vtable as well, but lately we are running into problems with it. Typically, one would describe their willed action, and then the DM would add some flavor to it depending on the roll. But, what with conversations? We mainly do dialouges first-person, and thats where it becomes troublesome. You actually say your part, its convincing, you have good argument, you reveal the sensitive ifnormation about the other person, so you can bully them into listening to you, then you roll and it all falls apart, and DM has to come up with bullshit reasons, why your meticulously designed argument did not work.

I also think that Roll then Go is great for narration. Even in D&D, and similar systems it could be cool. Player: Rolls for attack: 4, failure. DM: Ok, now describe how did you fail it. Everybody gets to narrate in a way that does not interfere with DMs scenario, players can add their little character details and flair even into failed actions, and DM has less work, and I think that DMs in general should think hard about how to lessen the burden of description.