nearly 16 are now "infected" I've been studying this thing for like 2 years, my scientist mentioned they could "solve" it some time ago. But now even they have been adding to the garden. I'm wondering if my curiosity has doomed them all.

Some of my more startling dream experiences have involved beeps, and other old tech noises.

Last night I was having a rough one. Body temp was spiking and melatonin only kept me down for like 2 hours. I was in the danger zone for awhile.

I heard my roomate talking. Our relationship is a bit tense as I've had to kick them out, it's that awkward phase between when I've asked them to leave and them actually leaving. I worry they won't make it out there. But that's a differnt story.

Later I hear a long whine of their door opening. It's very diffent. Its the sound of a door but it's more organic like an animals cry. My eyes must be open because I can see them fumbling with their phone light trying to navigate in the dark. The light grows and shrinks over and over around my door. This seems to go on for awhile, I want to get up an figure out what the hec they are doing. But I can't seem to move.

It sounds now like they are putting their shoes on and and preparing to leave. They never leave the apartment. They have no job, family or friends. And at this hour?

I hear the heavy front door unlock.

BEEEEP! It's like in the old times when folks whould accidently hit a number on their phone during a call. That exact beep I havnt heard it years. It's loud and startles me into being awake. The noise was too loud to really source but I know by now it came from within my own head.

It appears to have just been a dream. Perhaps my roomate just used the bathroom, and my head filled in the rest.

This isn't the first time a beep has ended a dream like this. It's happened many times before with differnt beeps. Usually older sounding tech. I assume these are audio hallucinations. I have also heard loud blood curdling screams, and crying but those may have been junkies outside. They do that here.

Another simular example happened when I was very young likely only 9 or 10. I remember waking up and not being able to move. It was to early to wake up but the sun had risen. I hear a voice from a terrible speaker "hello" next to me in the corner of my room is a McDonald's drive through menu/speaker thing. The person on the other end asking for my order and sounded frustrated by my lack of response.

I'll also point out my phone alarm is just the phone vibrations, and not a beep. I'm usually awake before it goes off anyway. I have do not disturb mode on untill work starts so I don't get notifications at night.

Sorry for another "Is this autism or normal human behavior?" Post.

There's a long story as to why I am experiencing this again but it's not really any more relevant then the title of this post.

For older folk it's like that episode of the Simpsons where Lisa, out of pity, give Ralf Wiggim a valentines day card and he immediately starts invisioning a future with her as his romantic parter.

I've identified I have this same trait and I hate it. Looking back I've totally made people who had been nothing but kind to me uncomfortable and shut me out because of this.

Now knowing that I am doing this is at least making me a little more in control and hopfully less weird. But now I need to stop and asses every interaction I have which is itself awkward.

I made a deal with my employers, they'd provide me time and funding and I'd pass some project management training to help with task related to that role.

I've been doing project managment for years already and it's a subject I am confident in. The course was easy for me since I found one geared towards my learning style.

But I got too confident and suggested I could pass the certification exam. I havnt had an exam since high-school and I did pretty badly at those.

The problem is that the questions are mostly scenerio based and I am taking things too literally, focusing on the wrong detials, or considering things from the wrong perspectives. It's driving me crazy because I know what I am doing and I have a lot of pressure to succeed, but this poorly written exam could prevent me from achieving it.

Does anyone else have this issue or know any preparation resources I could use to help me intrupet these things better?

I can't get ahold of support but it's down for ne in Toronto and my family out in Waterloo. Seems to be another big one. I can't get any info on what's going on.

Not sure if its just me. But the subscribed view is just showing me feeds from a bunch if stuff I am not subscribed too. I am still able to see my subscriptions in the sidebar, it's just the feed view.

solved: comment from user Otter mentioned lemmy.ca had updated. Logging out and back in solves this issue.

This is weird as I've only seen a few episodes of the show Rugrats when it was a new thing many many years ago. It was one of those things I only watched when home from school and sick. There was probably nothing better on. I don't particularly enjoy it. I am aware there is an "all grown up" spinoff but I've seen nothing from it.

Anyway to set the stage of this dream. It had Tommy now "Tom" is in high-school. "Chuck" is there but the others are just gone. They moved or ended up in differnt schools. He's being brave but he is terrified of the new setting. Cliche as hell.

Tom's father Stu is a huge YouTube personality. His inventions never sold well but people love seeing him invent cool stuff and being entertaining. Everyone knows his channel and he's generally regarded as a wholesome dude.

The dream is just an episode of this in which Tom has an argument with a teacher about somthing. Tom knows he is right but gets in trouble for refusing to back down on it. Stu is called by the faculty who also have no idea who he is. Tom is given a detention and misses some Halloween event as a result.

No one other than Chuck knows Tom is actually the son of this YouTube guy and Tom keeps this a secret from everybody.

While Tom is in detention he is watching his fathers new Halloween video. Stu appears on screen and this awesome 3D avatar of a deer skull in a bone theamed suit. There's even bones outlining his wild hair and a cool scepter. He sings a (possible original) song about "going your own way" and "making your own path" apprently he can sing really damn well.

Though everyone is watching this all around him Tom understand this video is just his father talking to him. It's like Stu is saying "authority is going to fight you, but hang in there".

I've been getting into, It's probably (not) Aliens. Somthing fun for long bus rides.

I'm not able to listen to or download or listen to anything right now though.

I've also noticed it's not on down detector so it's a bit difficult to tell of it's just a me problem or not.

I've delt with a lot of problem landlords and wish I was aware resources like this. It might be handy for those new to renting.

https://www.torontotenants.org/registration_is_now_open_for_the_november_2023_tenant_school?utm_campaign=november_december_2023_tenant&utm_medium=email&utm_source=fmta

I've been having a dought. It's a small nagging one but it's there.

I've been working a lot with my therapist on self hate issues, but I can acknowledge them.

I realized I can never really be in any kind of physical relationship with somone because of this. I'm repulsed by myself and perhaps my asexuality is just a result of that.

I wonder if I am so repulsed by myself that the idea of me being with anyone is rejected because of the "me" part and not how I feel towards others. Where some may think "I want to kiss that person" I can't bare the thought if subjecting somone to me in that way. And therefore the thought is gross.

Does anyone else deal with this? Any advice?

I am with Gore currently they are renewing my contract soon and raisng rate. I have never needed them so I cant really say if they are any good or not. But $40/mth seems kind of expensive.

I'm usually at the lowest rates. Other than my computer I don't own anything of much value. And I've never done anything to require a payout in over 20 years of renting. So I should be paying minimal levels.

I tried to call RBC about it setting up a plan. They told be they'd call me back at 5pm tommrow. That was about 2 weeks ago. So I took that as a red flag.

It's a typical video game peasant looking npc lamenting at no on in particular that's there's a very solvible problem. Oh is only somone could solve this for them! While a very strong capible looking player character is right next to them.

I'm reading somthing about emotional blackmail. Apprently this meme describes one form of it perfectly. Though I havnt seen it in years and I can't find it via searches.

Anyway, here's the story

It's taken over 2 years and it's been a weird process overall.

I am in Canada, assessment is free here with a doctors referral.

I've been a courseware developer for over a decade now. Part of the job has been to take documents made by instructional designers and make them into courses in various learning systems. Now I only do this as a side gig as the jobs been nearly automated out of existence.

One day I was building up a course on Nerodiversity and it kind of clicked for me. I didn't actually know much about autism. Growing up it was frequently juxtaposed with down syndrome. So I didn't learn about it until my 30's

But I checked a lot of the boxes and decided I should get it checked out.

Doctor said to try CAMH. So I had to call them and explain. They initially told me it wasn't worth doing and that as long as i am employed then there is no reason for it.

I insisted. I guess you got to really want it to get it. Got told I'd be on a waiting list for 6 months. This is unless I was willing to have it done by a private organization for over $5k. I chose the free option.

6 months later got a call. They wanted to get documents such as all childhood medical documents as well as all my high-school transcripts. I let them know I wasn't able to get any of that.

6 months later they call against asking for all that and that I give contact info for a parent or guardian. I give them my moms info.

About a year later I get called again. I had pretty much assumed it wasn't going to happen so I was a little shocked. But they just wanted all the documentation again. This time they actually called me back to book an assessment. They only asked I bring a few seemingly random items from a list.

I ended up having to go to my mom's house in a differnt city. It was a remote meeting but my mom didn't know how to do one of those. I borrowed my roomates laptop since I only use a big tower.

I got up at 4am to get to my mom's place that day. She had 2 new kittens running around. We figured the dining room was the best place to set up the laptop for this.

First half hour he wanted to ask my mom questions. While she answered I could listen but wasn't allowed to talk. Her two kittens where playing with somthing under the table.

My turn. He asked me a lot of the same questions to confirm my mom's answers.

About 2 hours in the laptop says it's about to die on me despite being plugging in. Turns out the kittens ate the cord. So I asked for a short break.

Being prepared for everything. I had actually brought a spare Webcam. I had to install it on my mom's old pc and install all the right drivers and software in the 15min break.

When the meeting resumes I am a mess, sweaty, exhausted and very tired.

The second part of the assement was even more questions but more subjective then the first half. He also read a child's picture book with me. He had me describe the I images. It was somthing about flying frogs.

The last part was to take some of the random items I'd been told to bring and make a story with them. I had trouble with that, I'm imaginative but not very creative also I was dead tired.

That was it though, they said they'd call me back with results in 2 weeks. My mom sent my roomate $130 to replace the cord cord her cats ate.

3 weeks later I called them because they didn't call me back. But today and they told me I am level 1 autistic. Ironically halfway through the short video call my very reliable pc just shut off for no reason. It hasn't done that before or since. They'll be sending me some resources and an invite to a workshop of some sort.

Not sure what to do with this yet. I'm just enjoying memes for now.

This means no sales, no themed merchandise, no decorations. December 25 and most other day are treated just like any other day for all stores malls, restaurants, ect.

You'd still get non religious holiday events like mothers days, or independence days.

What whould change?

I got my subscription a few weeks ago. I'm kinda regretting going for a 1 year sub.

For one I thought both Kurzgesagt and CGP Grey where on here only to learn they both backed out of the project.

According to Wendovers video https://nebula.tv/videos/wendover-how-a-small-group-of-creators-built-a-150-million-business/. I get the sense this happened around the same time they sold a good chunk of the company to Discovery.

Seeing all the creators hang out on a yacht isn't exactly a selling point for me as a subscriber who's struggling to make rent.

I'm also pretty disappointed by the lack of some features. Many of the videos don't even have captions and the ones that do are using a poor quality auto capture. I also really want comments. I know YouTube comments are known for being utterly terrible, but education is a conversation and with channels like these commenters can provide a lot of added educational value.

Also the history feature would be pretty handy. I go down rabbit holes then totally forget where I left off when logging back in.

And even shorts, creators use those. I hate the YouTube shorts but if I where to abandon YouTube I'll lose out on that content. By using shorts the content creators are keeping me going to YouTube .

I've also noted a lot of content is still formatted to YouTube. They have the click boxes at the end for more videos wich isn't a function in Nebula. It's like the videos are ending with a broken UI.

Overall I'm seeing a lot of effort to make the platform appealing to creators. However, there's much less effort in appealing to subscribers. Long term that seems like it's going to cause the whole thing to fail.

I know this is a long shot as the ads are a 3rd party thing. But I'm not sure where else to ask.

I getting infuriatingly misleading attack ads from a local political party.

I've already removed any ad settings in Google such as removing ad ID and targeted Ad setting. But that did nothing.

Is there kind of like "don't show ads from this organization" option?

I signed up with the FTMA (www.torontotenants.org) recently. I can't attend events like this myself but I can post about them here for those interested.

I am requesting modship for homestuck@lemmy.world

The existing mod has only ever made one post in there about 3 months ago. Even that was a result of me asking them to via DM. They have been inactive since.

After seeing it other users complaining about it in other communities I posted a notice in homestuck@lemmy.world that I come here and do this. I also suggested that if anyone else wanted it they could have it. It has been a week and I got a few responses but no one seemed interested taking the role.

In short this app claims to be a dating app for the Nerodivergent. Overall I am skeptical it isn't just another targeted data mining scheme that doesn't care about its users. So I am hesitant to jump in. Can anyone vouch for it?

Detailed Info dump:

For some reason despite being technically single for the past 2 decades I'm not as content with being alone as I used to be.

From what I remember about dating in my 20s dating sites where just waves of nerutypical people wanting lifestyles that I'd hate. I had nothing in common with anyone on them and gave up. I'm definitely more comfortable around other Nerodivergent people.

Normally I'd go volunteer or somthing to meet people. This isbthe healthy option. However I'm already working multiple jobs, and there doesn't appear to be many opportunities around that involve going out and meeting people.

So I'm cautiously investigating other, probably less healthy, options.

I'm hoping I am not misreading things here but it seems the mod of the community is gone? If not then let me know and I'll remove this. I'm not trying to start drama here.

As we do have some active users and intrest should we consider requesting that the lemmy.world mods transfer ownership over to a more active user? I belive they will do this for situations like this.

I'm willing to help out, reach out to the instance mods and such if folks want. At least until things get settled. But if there's somone here that is qualified and willing please speak up.