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Americans are confused, frustrated by new tipping culture, study finds

www.washingtonpost.com /food/2023/11/09/american-tipping-confusion-culture-study/

It's gotten rather absurd. If my interaction is with a kiosk short of being handed something, it's an insulting extra step. I'm already paying the price for my employer's pay scale ... I can't take on someone else's stinginess.

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  • The tipping for Uber Eats/Door Dash drives me up a wall. If I'm getting one small bag of food, why would I pay the delivery driver a percentage of the cost of the food? Why should a delivery from Chez Snooty tip more than a delivery from McDonalds if they're both the same amount of work for the delivery driver and they're providing the exact same service?? Now the LOWEST option in the app that's not custom is 18% and it defaults to 20%. WTF?? I already pay extra for the delivery!! You're supposed to use that money to pay your employees. If you can't, then your business model isn't sustainable!

    /deep breath

  • I don't think anyone's confused or frustrated by it.

    If you're not getting any extra service for something you're buying, you just hit the zero button.

  • The title of this article is an example of manufacturing consent.

    Culture is defined by people. If “Americans” as a whole are confused, this wasn’t a cultural shift.

    This is a direct result of companies asking their patrons to subsidize the wages of their workers. The capitalist class is asking the rest of us to pay their workers instead of pricing it into their business, and we comply because we have empathy for our fellow workers.

    Just pay your workers a dignified wage so I don’t have to have a moral struggle when I order my fast food. Please. I’ve just started buying less.

    Disclaimer: I can’t read this article because it’s paywalled. Most of my own wages are from tips.

    • Might I suggest the provided archive link in the original post? It pairs well with the house Chardonnay.

      I agree with everything you're saying, though the terminology seems a bit off. The hed is an example of framing, while the practice itself is manufacturing consent.

      I'm not a huge fan of the Post's framing these days (see also, "Why Isn't There A Recession" a couple years back), but I take satisfaction each year when I forget to cancel that I'll be sharing free links.

      I don't eat fast food at all anymore, short of when I'm moving. The appeal thereof was always "faster and cheaper than anything I could make," and my recent move made me aware that it's now slower and more expensive than getting Boar's Head sliced to spec at the deli in the grocery store, along with the rest of the fixings for about four sandwiches, and then going through the checkout line.

      I'm homeless by choice because at $21/hour, this year's rent hike posed the ever-pleasant question: Food or Housing? And how is that not a game show yet? I'm settling in nicely enough to living in a van that two weeks in, I gave notice at work with nothing else on deck.

      I have no kids, no house ... I'm society's worst nightmare at this point, as I have nothing making me afraid. Nothing I have to accept being demeaned and underpaid for. And I didn't take an auto loan out on my vehicle, so good luck repossessing that if it really hits the fan!

      I have nothing to lose. I've filed for bankruptcy before and will happily do so again if finding a job where I'm creating or improving a product, or improving the workflow, once again is a bridge too far and why can't I just write or code to trick people or lie to them? Sorry, you already lost me, so I'm not going to spread your bullshit.

      And all that said: Unless you're bringing rounds of things to my table, fuck off with this tipping thing.

  • The problem with tipping not being an extra is that one theoretically ends up paying the waiter's salary directly without being in a direct work relation with them. The restaurant pays people to be there, the clients pay the people to provide a service, the restaurant doesn't share their profits with their employees, the clients are pressured to decide how much of that profit should be shared and generate that number on the side.

    It's the old two categories being exploited and pitied against each other.

  • I don’t appreciate being asked for a tip when I’m eating at a place that only offers counter service. If all you’re doing is sliding a tray of food across a counter, then no, you don’t deserve to be tipped like an actual waiter.

    • So think about it this way. If you were at a restaurant without table service (like a pizza place or deli) that had a tip jar on the counter, you probably wouldn't get upset. You'd either tip or not tip and leave it at that, but unless you're a very specific kind of classist you probably don't mind the general concept of a tip jar quietly existing.

      Square literally is just leaving the option of a tip jar. If they don't prompt you to leave a tip, you can't leave a tip if you want to. Either there's a tip jar or there isn't. If somebody decides to give a little extra help to the people they're asking to help them, it gives them that option. It's nice to have even if it doesn't get used all the time, because someone who's feeling generous can tip extra, which is great.

      You should not feel like the existence of a Square POS immediately means you're being pressured or obligated to tip. If you're in a situation where you'd traditionally be expected to tip, like sitting in a restaurant or getting a ride in a taxi, then yes, obviously the social obligation remains. But if it's not one of those situations? Simply being given the opportunity to do so doesn't mean you have to. No more than you have to donate to St Jude.

      • Nah, tip jars don’t bother me. What I don’t like is that the person at the register can immediately see exactly how much I’m tipping. It’s impossible to be discreet. If I’m leaving a generous tip, I don’t like to feel as if I’m showing off.

        With tip jars, I make a point of tipping when the person at the register isn’t looking (like when they’re relaying my order to the kitchen or something). Maybe I’ll toss some money in the jar on my way out the door. When I’m getting table service, whoever waited on me doesn’t see the tip until I’ve already left the room.

        I don’t like the Square POS (or whatever) because it turns tipping from a spontaneous, pleasant surprise to a in-your-face formalized routine.

        I can’t blame you if you find my response frustrating. I’m fully aware that I’m being irrational.

      • It's the same reason people hate ads. If you see a poster in a restaurant advertising some service, you don't care. But ads on the internet are shoved in your face and must be dismissed to get at the content. The equivalent of a tip jar for Square would be a button that says "tip your server" next to "continue". Instead, there's no easy way to dismiss the tip prompt - you have to go into custom and choose 0, which makes it an active choice which must be made in order to even continue, as if the server held the tip jar directly in your face and you had to push it aside to pay at the till. It's an imposition, one which targets neurodivergency surrounding motivation and social anxiety (eg people pleasing and depression). They took one of my spoons!

  • North of the border, the Canadians are also getting pissed off. My 72-year-old mother accidentally press the tip button on a self-service gas pump and tipped 20%. She was livid.

    Over here in the EU we don't do the tipping. It is proposed on things like Uber Eats and some of the riders certainly take their time if they don't get a tip. Pardon my French, but when they roll up in a car or on a scooter, they can fuck right off. I tip cash when the deliverer is on a bike.

  • I have to wonder howuch the popularity of all the digital ways to pay is to blame for this. Way back people would leave a few actual bills on the table, it was presumed that the server would get them and all was well.

    Now people routinely use debit cards, phones, telepathic toadstool fund deposits, etc to pay for everything. You can use a credit card to buy a soda from a vending machine FFS. As a result it's simpler to just add it to a single transaction and so everyone wants their token.

    I'm always wary of paying a tip at the till though, part of me suspects the staff will never see that, or the owner will claim a portion for just being a swell person, which is not the point of the tip.

  • Next week, Las Vegas is hosting a Formula 1 race. First time since like the early 80s. Recently, the local government's taxi authority has authorized a $15 surcharge for certain trips during that time. Why?

    According to the Taxicab Authority Board, that surcharge is fully necessary “to encourage full workforce participation.” Apparently, there’s some worry that cab drivers will be less inclined to work on the busy event weekend. Not only is the city expecting an influx of European riders who don’t conform to the tipping customs of the U.S., but traffic is going to be abysmal with the main arteries of the city shut down to facilitate the race.

    Source.

    I have to believe that the majority of attendees will be Americans. Sure, there will be non-Americans from non-tipping cultures, but does that really mean that a $15 surcharge-in-lieu-of-tip is really needed on everyone? Especially as high as $15? For some of these flat-rate trips they range in price from $22-30. The surcharge means the "required tip" is 50-68%!

    Insanity.

    • Vegas has a rich tradition of taking visitors for every dime they have. This absurd charge is no different than the "resort fee" they charge at hotels. And good luck trying to get tickets to a popular concert or sports event at anywhere close to face value.

      As a local, all I can say is thank you for my lack of state income tax. :-D

      • Hey, I think fleecing tourists is A-OK! Why not get some of that sweet tax money? Especially if it alleviates some of the pain for residents. I know you Vegas residents also get like 10% discounts at all sorts of places, too.

        My parents moved there 5yrs ago. And my brother moved there over the summer. We're all from the Midwest. They definitely love having no state income tax! My parents keep trying to convince me to join them all, but I'm just not a Vegas person. I like to visit (mainly because of my family), but I don't think the lack of state income tax is enough.

        We actually did get tickets to one of the F1 practice sessions. Hoo boy. But I am hearing that the ticket prices on the actual race are starting to fall. So maybe we'll also get to see that!

    • A lot of taxi and rideshare drivers are saying they are getting the hell out of town for the event so they don't have to deal with it, so you have to incentivize people to stay on and make some cash. My source is just secondhand anecdotes of what cabbies were talking about when friends and family were visiting recently but if it sticks out enough for these people to mention it a lot of people must have said it.

      It sucks but for once I think Vegas isn't just being full of shit here.

      Whether it's the perception alone of European guests or a real issue is kind of irrelevant because the cabbies don't want to work the event either way.

    • You couldn't get me to drive a cab in Vegas for a $20 tip with every ride.

      I've definitely run into Europeans that are totally clueless about tipping and it sucks. I can absolutely see adding a gratuity during an event with a disproportionate number of Europeans attending.

      If you don't like it, you're free to not take a cab.

      • That goes without saying. That's true of any of this conversation; no one has to go to a restaurant. No one has to use Doordash. No one has to go to a barber shop for a haircut. That doesn't mean tipping and "force tips" are still OK.

        Either way, I didn't mean to cause such consternation. I've never taken a cab in Vegas, but having driven on Las Vegas Blvd myself during non-event times...yeah, I could see how that'd be a nightmare. Add on F1, with road closures and more clueless tourists than usual... I'd probably not drive a taxi (or even driving personally) for a week either!

        I guess in some ways, the addition of a surcharge here represents a truer cost of the service. It'd be like a restaurant not allowing tipping, but paying workers a much higher wage, while also upping the cost of the food and everything to account for that. And there'd be no "free rider" like we might see with those who don't tip. Every customer has to pay their fair share, so to speak.

        Though, like you're saying, it's still probably not enough. I wonder how much a taxi ride in Vegas would have to cost to make it worthwhile for a driver every time. I suppose if there's anywhere in the US where this experiment would work, it'd be Vegas. People pay a lot for the whole experience. Hell, they literally give money away to the casinos. Might as well get a little bit more out of them.

  • 🤖 I'm a bot that provides automatic summaries for articles:

    Click here to see the summary

    Drew DeSilver, the senior writer of the report, says the lack of consensus isn’t surprising given the ad hoc nature of the tipping regime in the United States.

    Most don’t like the addition of “service charges,” the amounts that many restaurants and other businesses have tacked on to customers’ tabs under various names, often to cover the higher costs of things like food and labor — without having to raise their prices.

    And they are also more likely to oppose a suggested tip amount than favor it, something businesses have recently taken to putting on touch-screens at takeout spots or on printed bills — ostensibly to make calculating them easier, but often used as a prod to get customers to shell out.

    But with more opportunities to tip, and with some restaurants and other businesses offering prompts, there’s still plenty of confusion about whether customers should leave a gratuity — and if so, how much.

    Advances in technology — like delivery apps and tablets at counters where you can tap to leave a gratuity — might be convenient, but they are contributing to the uncertainty.

    When DeSilver went looking to see what kind of guidance people were being offered, whether in etiquette guides or in popular media, the results were all over the place, he said.


    Saved 76% of original text.

  • was it new

    • The new part is every card payment system having a tip option, where as tips used to be a thing you gave a server in cash on the table, then a optional fee addended to a bill at a sit down restaurant to compensate the server (since they were getting payed below minimum wage), this is different though.

      Even food providers where there are no servers have “tips” now. Often times establishments do not even choose to have them, they’re just the default on the payment system.

      The tip system was always kind of scummy as it was putting the onus of preventing the server from getting kicked out of their home on the customer. Now though, rather than costumers being put on the hook for paying exploited workers, the companies are weaponizing that guilt based system to pad profits even further. Often times those “tips” don’t even end up going to the workers at the restaurant, they go straight in to the companies revenues, and pad the incomes of the payment service companies that get a 1-3% cut of every transaction.

      What used to be conceptualized as a way to reward hard work is now just another avenue to scam people out of money. It’s another crack in the wall of a system that is mindlessly sabotaging it’s own justifications. Creating further contradictions.

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