Accidental rapture

If there is a bigger entity, it should not care how it is named by you nor if you believe in such entity, but how you did behave and that you cared for others not only yourself.

And if the entity is indeed forcing you to believe in its existence more than in how you behave, then it is a shitty entity, which I don’t care what it thinks about me.

coming soon to theatres: "left behind: the reversal"

Plot twist: the algorithm was based on behavior, not branding.

Jesus is in my top 5 leftists ever 💖

Jesus entered the temple courts and drove out all who were buying and selling there. He overturned the tables of the money changers and the benches of those selling doves. 13 “It is written,” he said to them, “‘My house will be called a house of prayer,’[a] but you are making it ‘a den of robbers.

Anyway put money in the basket for my jet

Man you skipped the part where he spent hours hand making a whip to use on them too.
- That's metal. Have you ever been so mad you have made a whip?
Put MORE money in the basket for my jet, or God will hate you

God doesn't care if you're christian or not all he cares is if you ate enough chili dogs. Needless to say nobody who died before the mid 20th century went to heaven.

dies
God: "Timmy.. Exactly how many chili dogs do you eat a day?"
Possibly if you died really young.
Christianity promotes infant mortality.
- At the church I went to as a child, people were born sinners, thats why we had to go and evangelize them as young as possible. Babies in hell is common in non Christian counties! /s

in american dad, the rapture episode, thats exactly what sorta happened, hayley, steve both got "ascended" but they were also agnostic/athiest themselves. the priest was also left behind,.

....Win?

Jokes aside, if you don't believe in god and end up going to heaven because you were actually a good person that would be a win in my book, but I would imagine the atheist in this event would be eternally upset that they were wrong in their actual premise. Joke is more funny if you ended up in a non-Christian afterlife.

I'm atheist who went through an agnostic phase earlier.
So - as a thought experiment - let's assume there is a god and heaven and a judgment day.
There are two persons in front of the ultimate judge.
One behaved "good" but just out of fear of ultimate judgement.
The other one just he didn't want to be an asshole out of his own wishes.
Who'd pass?
So I think god is irrelevant. Belief is irrelevant.
Ultimately these ideas led me down the path of optimistic nihilism.
And my most important rule for life: Just don't be an asshole.
- 🙏🏻amen
I don't think most atheists would hate to be proven wrong. Most don't have an issue with other people believing either, unless they try to push their beliefs on other people.

I've actually been told by a Christian that I act more like a Christian than some of the Christians they know after sharing with them how I am trying to put my Anarchist beliefs in action through practicing mutual aid and building my community. I hope they realize they can do the same thing and still be Christian. God doesn't love the state and if He does, well...

there's a reason i coalition build best with religious anarchists while myself being an agnostic. there's actually a ton of radical political thought in theology if you can get away from a hierarchically programmed preacher long enough to study it yourself.
there's a song i love titled Owed to a Hypocrite about how the politician and the preacher walk down the road hand in hand oppressing all us regular people
- there’s a reason i coalition build best with religious anarchists while myself being an agnostic.
  Very hard to be an anarchist and then recoil at a neighbor with superficial differences in belief. If you need homogeneity of thought for anarchism to function, but you reject a hierarchy of institution to enforce canonical doctrine, how is that even supposed to work?
  there’s actually a ton of radical political thought in theology if you can get away from a hierarchically programmed preacher long enough to study it yourself
  Sort of the secret sauce of the modern major religious movements. They are all, at their core, populist messages intended to appeal to wide audiences of working class people. The insular cults and sectarian country clubs do a great job of raising tons of money from a few gullible rubes. But they can't stand the test of time without reforming back into popular theology.
  I would say that any serious student of religion or history really needs a teacher (ideally more than one). "Just do your own research" is fine on its face, but inevitably you run into contradictions and conundrums that the texts alone don't illuminate. A great deal of the Old Testament is written as part of a rabbinical dialogue, with different books and chapters and even verses intentionally challenging one another in order to spur meditation and debate. And plenty of Leftist texts follow a similar trajectory.
  You don't have to read Marx and Engels as somehow oppositional to Kropotkin, Bakunin, and Stirner. You don't have to read Descartes as oppositional to Kant. All these philosophers can operate in dialogue with one another. Perhaps even in some kind of dialectic with one another.
  But it does help to hold a certain set of common beliefs.
  there’s a song i love titled Owed to a Hypocrite about how the politician and the preacher walk down the road hand in hand oppressing all us regular people
  My favorite line from Game of Thrones is the Sellsword Riddle. The answer you give to the riddle says a great deal about what you think of political power and who ultimately wields it. And the deeper you muse on it, the harder it is to unravel.
Some of the most Christian acting people I have known were Jews, Muslims, and Atheists.
Has he invited you to go to church with him yet?
- I feel I may have been invited indirectly a couple of times when we spoke.

Christians (followers of Paul) are all heretics. I'm a follower of Christ Himself, not these Romans who killed Him and then appropriated His message.

Jesus was black, there's no such thing as Hell, Donald Trump is the Antichrist, Eve was a trans woman, and the government is lying about 9/11!

Eve was a trans woman
Hol up-
Imma need you to elaborate on this one lol
- Eve was made from a man's rib, so in a way at first she was a clone of his flesh, XY chromosomes and all. The bible does not elaborate on how the abrahamic god made her into a woman, she was able to bear children so there was definitely a change made to the "original" masculine reproductive system, but we don't know at what stage of her becoming a being that occured. Either way though - Adam's rib was transed by god themself into a woman.
  now i'm wondering how all the christian terfs would react if someone said that trans women are actually the original women
- She was made from a man's rib I guess.
Of all the Christians to put shade on I wouldn't have thrown Paul in the lot. Paul seemed like a pretty down to earth person from everything I read, he was basically a riches to rags semi militant hobo hippie. Now Peter....
first i was confused then i realized my confusion was the point and i let go
- Paul was a Roman who never met Jesus, but still claimed to be an apostle. He added many heretical doctrines to the Bible, reinterpreting Jesus' life to suit bourgeois sensibilities. Paul is the source of many conservative ideas claimed to be Christian. https://www.sol.com.au/kor/7_02.htm
  Also Eve came from a male rib. The Lord transed her gender when He made her into a woman
Support. As someone who grew up in a "christian" environment, it's amazing how little many "christians" actually know or care about jesus and his message. It's completely buried and obscured by random, irrelevant shit from paul, the old testament, etc.

I would read that horror story. Imagine unexpectedly facing eternity with The Spanish Inquisition, conquistadors, various other brutal imperialist forces and having it presented to you as a rare honor for a lifetime of Christian service. I imagine it like "The Good Place" except it isn't a comedy.

I'd rather laugh with the sinners than cry with the saints
The sinners are much more fun
- That Billy Joel song was banned by the Catholic church in my country when it first came out.
Hey just want to let you know I made a writing prompt based off your comment.
- Thanks! I love writing prompts. I saved it so I can see how it goes. Do you write on there?
No imperialist is worthy of eternal life in the Lord's kingdom. Jesus was a black transgender communist, and don't you forget it.
- ...Jesus was Jewish
- Transgender?

Evangelicals after the rapture:

“You know what would make heaven even better… Limp Bizkit”

St. Fred will certainly be seated close to the Lord of All Bizkits.

God's up there to greet everybody, and he's like "Who the fuck are all YOU people?"

This was fucking hilarious, thanks

Ain't happening, since belief in God is reiterated time and again as the main requirement for anyone to get any heaven time. Even Jesus was going “if you don't believe my father and me, then get fucked”.

belief in God is reiterated time and again as the main requirement for anyone to get any heaven time.
Reiterated by humans. I haven't seen an official press release from god.
Well, yeah, but you can't get people to join your cult if there're alternative paths to the afterlife.

Just because you weren't intellectually and/or emotionally competent enough to believe in the Creator doesn't mean you didn't act right and that He'd just disregard you. And certainly many of these hypocrites will taste Hell before righteous "nonbelievers". 👍

Just because you weren't intellectually and/or emotionally competent enough to believe in the Creator
I always find it funny when believers think they have to be intellectually/emotionally more mature than non-believers when non-believers don't need a spiritual crutch to get through life.
You're welcome to believe in a creator if that helps you get through the day, but don't pretend you're a better person because you believe in a god. Pretending it makes you more intellectually or emotionally competent actually tells people the opposite of what you think it does.
you weren't intellectually and/or emotionally competent enough to believe in the Creator
That's the funniest joke of 2025 lol
Marianas Trench level of self-awareness
- Oh no, trust me, I've walked both paths! But I know what's my audience here so I won't even complain about the reactions, lol.
r/usernamechecksout
- Just for the record, monotheism is heresy. There are many gods in the Bible. Was it not recorded in the book of Exodus that the Egyptian priests successfully called on their native divinities to transform their staves into serpents? That Moses and the Lord summoned a bigger serpent does not mean the Egyptian gods are false. The first commandment is "You shall have no other gods before Me", not "You shall have no other gods". The difference being, a true follower of Elohim believes in all the gods, but worships primarily their Lord.
doesn't mean He'd just disregard you
It's said many times both in the Old and the New testaments that whoever doesn't believe, is totally fucked for eternity. Read your own main book.
- It's also said that everyone is saved. Everyone.
  https://salvationforall.org/2_Is_Salvation_For_All_Biblical/1_salvation_is_biblical.html
  For as in Adam all die, so also in Christ shall all be made alive.
  There is no difference between Jew and Gentile, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and all are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.
That's hilarious.
It takes intellectual competence to believe in magic?
The best argument I've ever heard for any god is "you can't prove it didn't happen this way."
But I'm sure you have better than that, right?
- It takes intellectual competence to believe in magic?
  Yes, it does. Faith is like a muscle, it has to be exercised or it will atrophy, but with it, one can choose their beliefs, regardless of evidence. At the lowest level, this makes placebos stronger and helps quiet intrusive thoughts. At the highest levels of magical skill, all reality is one's plaything. Because by changing your beliefs, you can rewrite your perceptions and remake the world as it exists within your own eyes.
  Jesus said as much in the parable of the fig tree.

Noooooo, not eternal hyyms!!

And it won’t even be the stuff that at least sounds nice like the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. Oh no, it’s going to be hymns sung by backwoods Baptist church choirs. The ones too small for the blended sound to make up for their hopelessly out of tune joyful noises.
I want my heavy metal :,(
- heaven metal

Upvote for KC.

krispy chicken?
- Kirk Charlie
- Kansas City