I'm Tessellation Kilmister, and you're listening to NPR.

I’m Paisley Seeger, filling in for Steve Innskeep.

My IRL maiden name is a classic NPR name, though. It’s hyphenated, and the first name is uncommon and its ethnicity is not obvious, while the second name is a less common spelling of a more common name, that identifies it as a different ethnicity (think -ski vs -sky in Slavic last names). My sister’s got a funky first name that really sells it. My married name is incredibly normal and it feels a little weird to not have a distinctive name anymore, but I love not needing to spell it for anyone.

Live, from Chicago's famous Studebaker Theater, I'm Herringbone Winehouse sitting in for Peter Sagal on Wait Wait, Don't Tell Me. Today's guests have all been rounded up by ICE, so Bill Kurtis and I will exchange obscure yet witty barbs while a sad trumpet plays a downtempo version of the Wait Wait theme in a minor key.

This is Seersucker Van Zandt, and I'm asking you to go the phone...

This is Ogee Charanjit, and I'm here with Doris Kearns-Goodwin. We are discussing the unprecedented changes in presidential policy in the last 30 years.

All while set to a disco beat.

Paisley Becker?

Yeah, that scans.

Houndstooth Ididntgetnpr. Reporting.

Blackwatch Cornell

Do people just know names of patterns and have a favorite?

- Paisley. I finally can stop calling it "that paramecium design".
- Flashback to when you used to be able to make stuff like this your desktop background, just changing the pattern, color, and if it would fill/tile/stretch etc.
- oh, its vermicular michaelis. right.
Next you’re gonna tell me you don’t have a favorite bacteria.
- Don't bacilli, everyone has a favourite bacteria.
Yea a lot of people do.

Welcome to Fresh Air; I’m your host, Seersucker Gesualdo.

Hello, I'm Singleton Uematsu, welcome to NPR. Prepare for a major release of applause for the architect behind a truly class-ic framework, a gem of a developer: David 'The Rails Alchemist' Heinemeier Hansson!

What do you mean "we were not talking about software programming patterns"?
You made me look it up. Uematsu isn't dead
Singleton is your favorite pattern? We can't be friends anymore
- That's fine, they can only have one instance of a friend at a time anyway.
Factory Marx kind of slaps

“I’m Gingham Hoon and this has been Cereal: Solving the Mystery of Breakfast. Join us next week as we explore the Toast Timing Paradox”

I'm Tied-dyed Garcia, and this is NPR.

Why do I feel like the music cue after that statement is this.

I'm CADPAT Guthrie and I want to remind you that the second amendment includes liberals

There's a fun game called "NPR host or Star Wars character?"

See how many you can get right!

Razia Iqbal

Cikatro Vizago

Kai Ryssdal

Ofeibea Quist-Arcton

Douali Xaykaothao

Jek Porkins (lol)

Edit: Answers: only the second one and the last one are from Star Wars. The rest are NPR

I'm Fractal Morrison, and you're listening to NPR

Now here's Concentric Lamb with the weather.

i'm Penrose Cash, filling in for Houndstooth Shakur, and you're listening to NPR.

I guess I'm... Plain Mercury?

Solid Mercury.

Which is pretty cold...

0K... I'll stop.
Hi, it's you brother Polka Dot Mercury here.

“I’m Herringbone Bowie and this is All Things Considered.”

Fractal Knopfler

Don't you scare me like that
- Ah shit, it said deceased, sorry 😔 !

I'm Calico Morrison, and coming up next on The Delicious Dish, Pete Schweddy returns once again to give us a look at the methods his family has used to raise each pig that goes into a succulent Schweddy Wiener. So stay tuned and open your ears for Schweddy hogs, here on NPR.

First time long time here. Does Pete see the cost of Schweddy Balls going up with current market conditions for North American farmers?
- Well I don't see a lot of happy hogs in our future, caller. My balls have never been in greater danger of being trampled by government officials. Imagine all our hogs are one package, and that package is about to be shoved into a dark, dirty, stinking hole. Unless we firmly grab that package and give it some sort of twist, American farmers are going to find it increasingly difficult to raise their hogs in the coming years.

Chevron Shakur subbing in for morning edition. First up... just how many gummy bears can one put in their mouth? Scientists find out.

Joining me now is Flecktarn Winehouse.

Global, local. I'm Paisley Cornell, and this is NPR.

Gyazoo, bitches! It's ya boi, Moire Gold, with 37 minutes of Heartpounding Silence With Intermittent Cthonian Whispers! Let's get started!

Houndstooth Strummer with the anti establishment update: the establishment is winning

I’m Paisley Prine, up next, do podcast belong on the radio? This is NPR.

Blackwatch Clark

Paisley Lightfoot
- Houndstooth Hendrix

This is Marketplace with Dave Smith Aperiodic Monotile Schuldiner.

I'm Gingham Cornell and welcome to Dogs and Cats: Living Together!

Houndstooth Peart?

Oh hey, fancy seeing your sibling here. It's me, Herringbone Peart.

I'm Toile Brockie, and you're listening to Wait Wait, Don't Taze Me

So, dropped this in a friendly meme thread and ended up with myself Solid Steele And my buddy Fuzzy Static. One gpt pass later and this abomination was birthed.