Elon Musk: your new Tesla will drive from the factory floor, to your house 'this year'
Elon Musk: your new Tesla will drive from the factory floor, to your house 'this year'
I'm so sure that this will happen...
Right... My favorite "promise" so far was the Tesla SpaceX edition (with rocket boosters or microjets or some shit, IDK doesn't make sense) and die-hard fans defending this PR stunt as "the car that might fly".
lol right. tesla cars can't even tell the difference between a painting on a wall and the actual road.
It's irrelevant because I'm never buying anything that piece of shit touches.
Next thing they’ll “say it will do your taxes and walk your dog”. Seriously this company is so unserious.
lol they can’t even drive from the factory to the parking lot in their fremont facility.
I don't want to be caught dead driving one of those fucking nazimobiles. I would not take one even if it were free.
... from the Tesla factory floor, through the ditches, crash through several loony tunes landscapes, over your neighbors' dogs, cats, pet turtles, children, and finally park inside of your house after crashing through your living room wall to add an additional car port you didn't know you needed! Here at Tesla, we insist cameras are superior in every way possible to LIDAR. Quality is significantly improved on object detection when paired with 3M MAXIMUM EXTREME Quality Blue Tape+ for a premium cost. Every new purchase comes with a free, permanently center dash mounted Hitl -I mean- Elon bobble head performing the awkward "throwing much love" gesture. 3M Blue tape non transferable upon sale of the vehicle. Tesla retains the rights to not be held responsible for any damages resulting in your choice of using personalized automated delivery. Void where prohibited, which is nowhere. CALL NOW!
'this year'
Sure, Elon. Lets get you back to bed.
No it won't. I'd never my money on anything supporting that fascist pig.
I ain't buying that piece of shit if it offers blowjobs.
kinda like elon would put a man on mars in 10 years back in 2011.
LOL my Tesla? Nonono. The possibility of me ordering a Tesla would require so much leadership refactoring at Tesla, I'm confident this is no longer a possibility.
To put it more sussinctly:
Fuck off with this bullshit ad headline. I wouldn't touch these swasticars if they jerked me off nightly
... Even assuming the self driving tech was actually capable of doing this, which is won't be...
How would this even make any sense?
Ok, if you live within about 200 to 300 miles of a Tesla factory, ... you have this option?
Fremont, California; Sparks, Nevada; Austin, Texas; Buffalo, New York; Lathrop, California.
Outside of 250 miles ish of one of those places? No self driving delivery for you.
... And I am pretty surr not all models are made at all those locations.
Despite long ago claiming his EVs and charger network would be capable of automatically recharging or battery swapping themselves... to make a long distance journey... that ... doesn't exist, he abandoned all of that.
Even funnier: Imagine a tesla self driving from the as of yet to be completed gigafactory in Monterrey Mexico... through the border checkpoint.
The auto charger network doesn't exist, the car would murder people, cause an accident or fucking explode in the border queue... and even if none of that happened... how in the fuck is a self driving car gonna get through a militarized border crossing?
If he just gives himself a waiver via DOGE for his cars... congrats Elon, you are now a drug trafficker / arms smuggler, whether you know it or not.
... fucking lunacy.
Bullshit.
FSD is getting people killed and somehow this same car will get any kind of “ok” to solo drive to someone’s home from the factory?
More promises by Muskrat that aren’t gonna happen.
Probably have a sales rep in the car to monitor the drive.
Is Joe Schmoe going to have to answer for his shitbox that just plowed through a school zone with an unusual number of speed bumps? Joe hasn't even met his vehicle yet and it's gonna be out there committing crimes potentially under his name.
Not because of advancements in technology, but because of erosion of regulations.
You will Nazi it coming.
will it fall apart while en route.
Not if your home is not in USA, your new Tesla will have to pay Tariff and don't know how.
It can drive itself straight to the dump
No it won’t.
Lies
[ Doubt ]
Tesla will begin its roll out of its self-driving Robotaxi fleet in multiple US cities in the months to come, already taking appropriate regulatory steps in both California and Texas.
Anyone want to take bets on how many deaths/injuries will there be before they're pulled?
Infinite is valid all things considered.
Do people still care what this turd has to say?
Later this year: "I was right, but I actually meant to say 'into' instead of 'to' and 'someone's' instead of 'your'"
Is that a threat?
Riiiiiiiight
I'm sure Elon musk would hit all of his timelines if it wasn't for the Democrats or Steven Miller
Enough musk spam...
This is such obvious BS. Putting aside that Tesla are always making claims about self driving that they can't deliver on, let's just consider the basic logistics of doing this for any customer who lives more than about 300km from a Tesla factory (of which there are two IIRC, and one of those is in Austin and the other is in Fremont)...
How the fuck is the car going to recharge?
It's not like it's going to plug itself in, and there are no staff at Tesla supercharger stations as far as I'm aware. With the range on a typical Model S even getting to LA might be tough if it gets stuck in traffic. Fremont to LA is just under 600km if you're lucky.
Not my fucking house.
"it drove right through my kitchen wall. And I hadn't even ordered one!"
If they even try that it will look like that car chase scene from The Blues Brothers.
Factory Floor is in China.
When a battered car with a mangled cyclist smashed through your wall
Sure Elon. Here, have another hit of ketamine.
Jokes on him I’m never getting one
Everyone: Hey, I've seen this claim before! Elmo: What do you mean you've seen it? It's brand new!
Ha ha ha sure Elon.
Elon Musk: Your new Tesla will get into a serious accident and be totaled before it even gets to your house 'this year' (and you're still liable for it)
Soon the only ones buying Teslas will be factory workers that are forced to in order to keep their jobs. The basically live on the factory floor, so it's a pretty easy promise to fulfill.
Elump will accomplish this not by improving technology or software, but by outlawing any safety regulations that prove inconvenient.
“It’s dirty. Why did you deliver it dirty?”
To your house, through the wall, and into the living room?
Announced since 2014
What excuse can he use later?
I mean, when it turns out that it's not happening this year, and not even next year.
Any bets?
My guess: He won't be with Tesla anymore then, so all these broken promises become somebody else's problem.
Sure, Jan.
I told them I didn’t want the car delivered to my house. If they did, I would auto accept it. Even if there’s issues on it. Accept it from their dealership.
He means that's how long it'll hold together
It already drove across the country by itself several years ago.
I feel that spreading lies, even to make fun of them, is ultimately counter-productive. I know others disagree though.
BULL's PUUUSSSY!
