"do what you want to me" is my least favourite dirty talk. The base idea is that we both currently WANT to do the same dirty rough sex but for some reason we're not doing it. What makes her think he's NOT doing what he wants right now? What if he's a for fetishist and wants to put her foot in his mouth and jerk off? What if he just wants her to eat his ass?
Clearly "do what you want to me" doesn't mean do what you want to me. "do what you want to me" means "I have a specific type of rough sex in mind but I'm not able to express my desires clearly, so I've projected them into my partner and I've made it their responsibility to understand me and do the right type of sex stuff to me"
I know this is basically an unhinged response to a greentext but I've had so many bad experiences with that specific line. Is wanting clear communication before and during sex about the sex we're about to perform too much to ask for?
I think this is really a just communication thing: I'm with someone that says "do what you want", and I'll say it myself too, but we've been together long enough that there's an implicit understanding of what that phrase means.
The point is that it's a turn on to feel desired, even more so when you can just "give up control" and they'll still do something you like. My experience is that the whole "do what you want" thing isn't something you say to turn on your partner so much as yourself. Specifically, when I say it, it's a way of communicating what I want (because of the mutual understanding of what it means) while keeping the pretense that I'm giving up all control (which turns me on). Likewise, when my partner says it, I know what she wants me to do, but keeping the pretense that I'm in complete control is a turn on for both of us.
Of course, this kind of mutual understanding has been built up over time, and I wouldn't recommend communicating like this in a fresh relationship or one night stand.
I'm very sex positive and my partners have been too, so I don't really have this issue, but I think porn has really affected both heterosexual men and women's perception of sex. You hear it from the female perspective a lot where men just start hitting or choking them during sex, but there's a cultural undercurrent of the opposite experience where women will try and take a guys hand to her throat and apply pressure because for some reason asking to be choked is weird but that isn't. Both men and women are seeing rough sex portrayed in porn and assuming that's the sex everyone wants/is having. In reality, it's dangerous to do breathplay with an inexperienced partner and that's not something you just spring on them. I think sex is still a taboo subject and people need to get more comfortable speaking about it. I think the idea of enthusiastic consent and how it incorporates into foreplay is often the deciding factor in how an encounter goes, but often neither party knows how to engage in it.
When I hear people say that porn is bad for your brain I'm always confused. But then I remember rape and cheater porn are two of the most popular forms of porn.
Sounds like something that could be very easily solved with basic communication.
Oh, so "Do what you want to me" doesn't mean put her feet in my mouth and jerk off? But that's what I want.
She contractually cannot complain
Well, I assume the girlfriend knew the guy REALLY liked Ol' Reliable, right? In this case, screaming "do what you want to me," while clearly indicating a desire for something else, has been 100% respected.
If you want something different, say it specifically. Our pee pees are touching, kinda' late for being Victorian about it...
Should have called her a fuckin retard
The internet has ruined dirty sex talk.
Totally fake, and gay. Anon never has sex, and if they did, it would be up their own ass
That being said, old man babbling incoming
Why people gotta always want the crazy shit? Like, can we not just have some nice, gentle, loving sex more often? Why we all gotta pretend there's a camera on and be all contorted and have things shoved in our ears and shit?
Like, motherfuckers, put on some Barry White and get your slow jam on. Get some deep, grinding, balls up against them fucking going. Let that fucking fire build up until you both melt into each other.
I ain't saying to never get your pound on! Nah, as long as your partner is up for it, play big daddy jackhammer. But gods damn, that ain't a fucking fleshlight you're inside of, and that ain't a giant dildo you're riding. It's a person, explore that motherfucker, get that deep fucking going on. And I don't mean where the dick is knocking on the cervix and wanting in, I mean feel that shit, feel every inch sliding in and out of that steamy goodness.
See, you do that kind of fucking, when one or both of you get to the climax, that shit comes out of your soul. You want that shit to be mind altering, where you're seeing dragons fucking and unicorns rearing against alien skies and shit.
You the one with the dick, you fuck that pussy like you love it, like it's the most precious thing in the world. You the one with that pussy, you wrap that thing up in your hot and salty goodness and hug it tight like it just got home from the war.
Make love with that shit
Great writeup though.
i mean yes but people should also be allowed to express their love in whatever ways they and their partner find appealing. If their version of love making is a hardcore bdsm scene involving pegging, pet-play, piss-play and some kink we've never heard of but has an underground scene of thousands, who am I to say that that act to them is what sensual love making is to you?
i mean don't get me wrong, I do like an old-fashion so to speak, but other people like different things, and that should be ok.
Assuming the green-text is true, or even if it is just as a story to bring across the point, the notion is that "do what you want with me" is implied to be some of the "hardcore" things rather than the possibility of anon just wanting sensual intimacy.
The critique is that the assumption of everyone wanting "hardcore" things is just false. And frankly a lot of people do make themselves suffer by trying to adhere to this porn idea of sex, instead of allowing themselves to be sensual.
I'm sure you have sex real good etc etc, but honestly, a lot of heterosexual men do not have sex real good. Your conception of "loving sex" is fine and all, but often penetration alone is not pleasurable enough for women, especially if their partner is inexperienced or if neither party is familiar enough with the woman's anatomy to find an angle that's more stimulating. I'm not saying rough sex is the answer, but a lot of women think "boring sex" is bad because their partner is doing the technical aspects of what you're saying "long, slow strokes" but neither party is able to make that as pleasurable for the woman involved. Male anatomy (in general) can enjoy a wider variety of stimulation than female anatomy and slowing things down can be really great for both parties, but in my experience requires more work for the female party to enjoy it to the same extent. Again, just my experience, but long and slow can easily turn into a version of starfishing with an inexperienced partner.
The most important thing is to communicate.
My SO and I have experimented with most of that, and it turns out, pound town is the best option for my SO, and my little member is happy to oblige.
Try different things, communicate about what works, and don't always do the thing you both prefer, because variety is the spice of life. And hey, maybe that thing you tried a few years ago and didn't like is interesting again (e.g. SO is liking being on top more now that they have more stamina from regular exercise). People change, just make sure to communicate and back down if it's not working.
👏👏👏 Bravo!!!
New pasta just dropped
On yeah, you like that you fucking retard!?
I think about this story like once a month.
What story again
I prefer slow, but I also like pleasing my partners. I straight up tell them that if you say "do whatever you want with me", it's gonna be slow. If they want to be slammed harder than Pete Hegseth downing a beer, then they need to say that instead.
Communication, people. I know it's cliche to say communication is important, but it is.
Flip her over on her belly and do her
missionary doggyprone-bone style.Edit: thanks @UrPartnerInCrime@sh.itjust.works!
And put a mask on the back of her head if your facial recognition's not participating in the fun.
Slow deliberate strokes to finish is a fun way to change it up from pounding away.
Maybe stop shouting, some of us try to sleep here!
Shut up uncle Joe, Charlie needs to cook!
Means she needs the old AM radio dials fine tuned, antenna extended, and solid rockin the boom box. Pick up the squawk box and dance to the jams
Every single word...damn it, I'm old...
I had someone tell me I could fuck her harder. That isn't what turns me on. Oh well.
The absurdity made it funny, well done.
"you mind if I put some music on to get me going?"
I had almost forgotten this insanity.. My colleagues are giving me weird looks, while I try to contain my laughter
My partner would never say that to me. Something about the back of a Volkswagen.
Dude show some emotion moan cry call upong your pagan gods, anything. Some guys just be there thrusting with their eyes closed and no sound. That's why she thought you weren't enjoying it.
Relatable
