>Get BJ on prom night
>Week later massive red spot on cock
>Herpes
>Fuck
>doctor say this shit is
uncurable
>No woman will want me
>Struggle with shame and depression
>Lose all interest in sex
>Go years without being with a woman
>Finally regain some self confidence
>Brainwave.exe
>Need woman who already has the disease
>Find old hooker on craigslist
>Looks pretty ragged on the blurred photo
>Has probably had a million diseased cocks in her
>Call her up
>Explain I have herpes
>Tell her I presume she has it too
>Silence
>Then she hangs up
I dont know where to go from here bros
It’s fine, I can easily search 8chan and find greentexts an order of magnitude more deranged. This isn’t even the tip of the iceberg, thankfully/unfortunately
I'm not. The site was running on old software a decade ago and hasn't been touched. I'd be surprised if they don't swipe another chan software and just slapped a coat of paint on it, but I don't expect them to be rushing to get the site back online after they got entirely rinsed.
Hey, it's 1 in 10 for the genital version in the U.S. Not common. When someone dismissively says "oh it's not that bad, it's not the end of the world", they're not the ones who had to deal with pain of taking shits with sores in their ass. To deal with having a hard time being able to tell the difference between gas, liquid, and solids knocking at the door while on stool softeners to help make shits less painful. They're not the ones who have to have the downright humiliating "oh by the way I have herpes, are you ok with that" talk. (They never are).The fact is, it's debilitated me mentally and physically. The scarring from it has taken all the pleasure away from anal for me, and it still hurts to shit half the time. Don't treat it so fucking lightly.
i’m sorry that you’ve had that experience and i don’t mean to diminish what you’re don’t through, but it’s also very important to note that this is far from the normal for the very large majority of people
fear doesn’t help sexual health… all sex comes with risks, and unprotected sex comes with significantly increased risk but the reality is by and large this is not what HSV looks like without other factors effecting it
downplaying risks is bad, but equally bad is people thinking a condition is worse than it is. this leads to more risky behaviour, because if they get the “scary” thing and it’s not as bad as they expect, they can take risky behaviour because they discount all their other education
it also only reinforces stigmas. this is particularly common with HIV-positive people: these days, if you have an undetectable viral load (if you take your daily medications) you can not pass on HIV… however the stigma remains, and people still often choose to not have sex with someone with an undetectable HIV infection (again, undetectable IS UNTRANSMITTABLE)
muddying the waters is very bad at scale
calm, unbiased information is what is required for public health. individual anecdotes about worst case scenarios do not serve to make people’s lives better
what are the implications on quality of life of various STDs? how "bad" is it to catch herpes? is it even worth avoiding it? (as i read somewhere that most people catch it eventually anyways.)
There's two variants. One is extremely harmless and is generally oral. This is the one that nearly everyone has and no one really notices. The other variant is generally genital (though either one can be in either place) and is more severe and less common. The first outbreak can be really bad, subsequent ones less so. An estimated 1 in 10 adults in the US have it, though I'd imagine it skews a lot more towards highly sexually active communities. It can be transmitted even if you don't actively have sores, though that's much rather. Condoms also don't prevent transmission, though again they make it much more unlikely. While getting it certainly doesn't have to be the end of the world it is worse than they generally say.
It works by making fucking ugly sore blisters on/around my mouth a couple times a year. they dry out and crust off after a week or so and i get on with my life.
The important and nastiest part of HSV is some strains cause cervical cancer in women, so men with HSV must take care not to spread something that has the potential to kill their partner. There is a vaccine, but it doesn't work 100%.
I got HSV-2 after my longtime partner cheated on me, and it's absolutely miserable. I wouldn't recommend anyone take it as lightly as some people do. During the first outbreak I couldn't pee at all because it was blocking my urinary tract, and it felt like I had a horrible flu. I get outbreaks constantly and they're so painful that it's hard to sit at my computer at work. The daily pills are massive and give me a stomach ache, and only reduce the frequency of the outbreaks but don't prevent them entirely.
I never asked for this, I was never promiscuous, I only did not use protection because we were in a monogamous relationship for 4 years. Dating is hard enough because I'm trans and ugly, so I've resigned myself to just never having sex again.
This happened to my wife, FWIW, from an old horrible partner (abusive too, v cool). Her outbreaks got milder over time to where now they're a minor inconvenience at most. And they don't get in our way, so to speak.
Even though, yes, some folks are now preemptively and permanently out of your dating pool, I'd argue that a lot of the people self-excluding in that way have done you a favor.
Love is strong stuff! I can imagine how low you feel about this, but I hope you allow space for it to improve over time and you don't give up on having a sex life or romantic partners. You're worthy of love, this dumb (and seriously common) disease can't change that :)
Pretty sure there are sites specifically for and sites that have filters for people who have certain STDs (HSV1, HSV2, AIDS, etc.) so affected people can still get together without worrying about spreading diseases.
I forget which one it is, but even one of the mainstream sites had an option for this years ago when I was dating. OK Cupid? Plenty of Fish? I think it might've been one of those.
If they don't have a sore, they aren't infectious are less infectious, but frankly, if this isn't something she tells you before it gets intimate, that's a red flag in my book. One of my exes had HSV and she disclosed everything to me beforehand. I kinda freaked out internally at first and considered breaking it off, but then I actually researched it and found out there's not a risk if they're not having a breakout (still use protection of course).
Things didn't work out because of other reasons, but it was a pretty good relationship while it lasted and I don't regret it. I still have a clean bill of health, no infections so if you meet someone that has HSV, try to keep in mind it doesn't necessarily have to be a deal breaker as long as your partner is honest with you and you take precautions.