This is what we're training LLMs on.
"AI," what should I do about being constipated?
Painfully stretch your rectum to gaping in order to accommodate your constipation.
good, it beats the incompetent assholes that just tell you not to do things when you ask them how to do them just because they are harmful.
Don’t tell people not to do things. It’s harmful.
I don’t know about anyone else, but I’ve had moments of pure despair as I feel like one’s gonna tear me in half.
A real porcelain shatterer.
It’s like a fuckin’ howitzer when it reaches the release point, for real
A sound like from a gun, followed by the shattering of porcelain.
Me too, once held too long when i was busy and kept hitting the 'snooze button' on going all day long, end of the day i dropped something that resembled a hand grenade, with the little square-ish ridges and everything. The pain, the relief, the lasting butthole tenderness afterwards.
This lady claims to be an expert but doesn’t even mention the poop knife?!
Somebody should write a small book about this. You could put it in the bathroom and read it while taking a shit.
For those of us that pooped before smart phones, there was a book series called Uncle John's Bathroom Reader. I could totally see them have a section dedicated to this.
"The Art of Defecation - How to turn your anatomy into a brown (f)art factory"
It could have an entire chapter just on fiber maxing:
https://i.imgur.com/zmtuVg1.png
Another could be on shit polishing with the mythbusters method.
I once held a shit in for a week. Literally 7 days. I was in the hospital and forbidden from using the toilet and using the portable bag toilet in the room with 6 others was not gonna happen so I held it in. Nurses gave me laxatives because they were concerned but I beat them too.
After finally being allowed on the toilet, I basically filled the bowl to the top and clogged the toilet. Yes, it hurt. I now know why and I'm never doing it again.
My friend poops once a week. He claims he told his doctor and they said it's "on the edge of normal." It freaks me out though. I'd feel so bloated all the time.
Maybe that no poop challenge guy has tips for next time.
I think the question OP didn't want to ask was, "does all of this dick in my ass affect my poops?"
the bowel is wider than your asshole
imagining a nurse using the word “asshole” to explain it to a regular person is just hilarious to me.
My mom had to get a colostomy last year after her bowel ruptured, and she spent a month in ICU recovering from sepsis. The nurse there, when she was finally awake, tried explaining everything to her, but she had some pretty severe ICU delirium, and just couldn't comprehend everything she was saying, especially when she was using medical terms.
Eventually, the nurse said, "girl, basically, you don't need your bootyhole no more. That's now just for your husband and lonely weekends"
At which point she fully understood, and I died inside.
I never realized that this process is basically a biological cold extrusion.
That's because it isn't. As was just explained, the shape is pretty much set before the "extrusion die" sphincter comes into play.
What are you talking about? The asshole works as a die. Extrusion is about deforming the object, it doesn't have to change its general "shape". If there is plastic deformation, which there is as stated(unless you hold it in unhealthily long), then it counts. You extrude a cylinder with a big cross section to one with a smaller cross section.
TIL my butthole is a PlayDo’h Fun Factory…
Putting the Shit in ShittyLifeProTips.
We have finally found The Forbidden Knowledge
There's nothing about that paragraph I didn't like!
Now that's one shit experiment to figure something specific out.
That's nice, dear.
I felt that.
I just finished my surgery rotation for medical school and I saw so many colonoscopies. I have seen the inside of dozens of people's colons and this is a pretty good explanation for what's going on. I could also tell which patients ate a lot of fruit or seeds because there would still be some residual seeds in there after the clean-out prep.
Pro tip: if you are going in for a colonoscopy, ask for the pill form of the prep. Most insurances cover it, it works better, and you don't have to drink the gallon of disgusting fluid.
Also! Colonoscopies are very important! They are the single best tool for detecting and preventing colon cancer. During the scope, if they find any polyps, they get removed and sent for evaluation to see if they are cancerous, pre-cancerous, or benign, and the polyps are basically the seeds of colon cancer. It is recommended to get your first colonoscopy at age 45, unless you have a family history of colon cancer, in which case you would get your first one 10 years younger than the age the family member was diagnosed, or age 45, whichever is younger.
There are the home tests like the cologuard, but that has a 45% false positive rate, and they're only good for 3 years while a colonoscopy is good for 10 years(*) if it comes back normal, so the cologuard ends up being more expensive in the long run. It also only detects the later, more advanced polyps that are more likely to be closer to being cancer, and if it comes back positive, you have to get a colonoscopy anyways. A lot of the false positives come from the fact that it tests for DNA associated with cancer mutations and for microscopic blood in the stool, and they don't tell you if it's positive because of the DNA or the blood, and you can have microscopic amounts of blood in your stool for tons of reasons.
TL;DR: Colonoscopies are very important, and MUCH better than the home test. Talk to your primary care provider about when you should start screening, and if you're over 45, go get scheduled for one now. Colon cancer is a horrible disease, and it's actually quite preventable and easy to catch in the early stages, if you get your colonoscopies on the recommended schedule.
*Addendum: If your colonoscopy detects certain kinds of polyps, or more than a certain number of polyps, you might be on a shorter interval for surveillance scopes to make sure they catch anything before it becomes cancer, and that interval can be anywhere from 3 to 7 years depending on what they found. Also, if you have a family history of colon or rectal cancer, you'll be on a 5 year schedule because you're higher risk.
Great
Very fitting to my current um, situation
This was very informative
Excuse me. I have to go take care of something.
just hold your poop in
But now, from a medical professional, so you know it’s legit.
