You missed the stage where you don't want to openly identify as autistic because of the stigma surrounding both autism itself as well as self-diagnosis
I'm just entering that stage after a seeing how some of my friends have started treating me once I told them. With these friends in particular, now everything I do is somehow an autism conversation starter.
Example 1
Me: I spent last learning about abiogenesis. Have you guys looked into that?
Them: omg, that's so autistic
Example 2
Me: I cut it off with the [autistic] girl I was dating. She had some red flags that really turned me away.
Them: Okay, so you're both, which means you guys have communication deficits.
It's like I stopped being me with personal characteristics, preferences, and interests. Now, I'm an autism case without any individuality outside of autistic traits. Also, to them, I'm not autistic. I have autism. This has really strained the relationship to the point that I don't really desire to spend anytime with them. It's sad, because I've known them for over 5 years, and up'til now, they had been pretty cool.
Hahah I recognize every one of these spaces
I'm another late-diagnosed adult, and the weird thing about it is that I didn't start having these conversations with myself until after being diagnosed
omg, right?! I found out as an adult not too long ago. Initially, I was told by two friends that are both psychologists and had known me for over 5 years that I was autistic. I completed a bunch of online assessments that all found there was a strong probability that I am autistic. After that, I went and got a thorough 3-4 hour assessment completed by a psychologist whose sole job is to test for autism, and was directly told halfway through the assessment that I was surely autistic. I still didn't believe it for maybe a month. Now, I'm 100% convinced, but that acceptance takes a while sometimes.
I had an autistic friend that when she was realizing she was autistic, attempted to fail (pass as NT) online autistic questionnaires and still popped as autistic. She was in the "Just trying to convince myself it's autism?" stage and trying prove herself wrong.
My therapist was telling me she's pretty sure I'm autistic, I wasn't sure. So she gave me a book called "Aspergirls" and it was like reading my life, super spooky.
yeah, I get caught off guard sometimes when I think I'm not "that autistic" and then run into a meme. the latest thing is that I started watching Love on the Spectrum and feel like I'm watching documentary of my life. it's hilarious to me 😆🤦♂️
Ive never really thought about it untiul I read about the RAAD test, then I took it and got a 115 and now I'm like ooooohh. When the move is done and got a new Dr gonna ask about it.
I've been on this planet for nearly three and a half decades, and this tiny comment just made a lot of things click for me. I'm gonna try and see a professional, I've got a lot to unpack.
156 here, and also didn't think about it until my sister got diagnosed, and she has quite similar problems (and she had 157 in the same test, aha). Well, I just wasn't sure if it's "real autism" or "real" anything or that I'd "persuaded myself of something I can't reach as an important goal" etc.