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  • I currently list my pronouns as she/xe/it/thon/ꙮ, with the idea being that people will have a range of options regarding which word to use: if they like, they can choose to just stick with one pronoun, probably she or it, and forget the rest; and if people do choose to refer to me using a neopronoun, then they can more or less use the spellings or pronunciations or inflections or agreements that work best for them. And this seems to be how most neopronoun users are: virtually all neopronoun users also go by an auxiliary pronoun (he, she, they, and/or it) for accessibility's sake, and virtually all neopronoun users are also very forgiving about how their neopronouns are used.

    For me it goes a step further, since I'm good with being called pretty much any neopronoun, even though xe/thon/ꙮ are my favorites; and I'm even OK with being called he or they in a few specific contexts. I don't really bother explaining all that, though, since nobody wants to hear a treatise about autistic non-binary transfemininity in the middle of a pronoun circle, so that's why I usually just list my five favorite pronouns and call it a day.

    So all in all, while we all have our linguistic preferences or sometimes complicated feelings regarding how we're referred to, the main thing that matters is that people just try to use our pronouns at all. So the problem with neopronouns, in my experience, is that most people end up either dismissing "made-up words" out of hand, or they get so hung up on using the neopronouns "correctly" that they end up just not using the neopronouns at all. So either way, it all comes back to people's discomfort with using non-prestigious, non-standard language, and this discomfort is sort of justified by the stereotype that people have about neopronoun users being 100% self-centered and unaccommodating.

    I think part of the problem is that most neopronoun users don't really think or know much about the linguistics (especially the pragmatics) of neopronouns, and this causes neopronoun users to be worse advocates for neopronoun usage... But I also don't think that people need to have a scientific knowledge of which words they prefer to be called, in order to have their preferences respected.

40 comments