This looks a hell of a lot like an ad. As an educator, my suggestion is to create study and accountability groups and to use free resources like departmental tutors or a writing center. Education is already expensive enough.
You can try a bleach dilution on an older pair. Something you might otherwise throw away. Start with 5:1 water to bleach and try stronger concentrations until you get the desired results. Make sure you measure and record your measurements so you know the ratio that works best
Disclaimer: This could ruin your clothes. You should see what others have to say before trying. I'm a scientist not a... person who knows useful things
There's a lot of ways you can take it. I look it as if you take a step back, the world is a strange and surprising place absent of your place in or ability to influence it. I say why worry about what you can't change and delight in it as it unfolds. A less cynical take on "farce".
People call those who don't want kids selfish. Perhaps. But what do you call someone who thinks they should duplicate half of themselves? Mother Fucking Teresa?
I might have missed something, but when they say they want to socialize I take that to mean talk to people. They have friends but don't know what to talk about. My suggestion was talk to the people they know about those people's interests. Know your friend likes boats? Cool. Ask them questions about boats. Now you are having a conversation where the other person is doing most of the work.
But I'm still not going to do anything to fix it because I'm strong and was able to overcome it