I am using debias as os , and never had a problem with thunderbird, did you used recently? I am not against web, but i manage 5 emails so no way the web is a option for me. Also i start to use the rss from thunder and is cool.

Well my concern is not at home, my problem is with vps, pwd for database,api keys.. I have no idea how to approach this problem. I know that a good sysadmin can get everyting but at least i want to be more safe against average admins. For me the "trust" it is something over rated.

Well i am far far from Russia so i don't care, it can't be worst compared to google. I don't believe too much in the real privacy, one way or another 3 letter agencies will get the info.

Maybe some will dislike , but i use yandex, i don't know why, but i get good results. I prefer to give them my info and not google

Well this part with Russian company it is so lol. I am more comfortable giving my dns requests to russia and not to my goverment

Did you try Tailscale? It is working behind gnat