One time, this guy handed me a picture of him, he said "Here's a picture of me when I was younger." Every picture is of you when you were younger. "Here's a picture of me when I'm older." "You son-of-a-bitch! How'd you pull that off? Lemme see that camera... What's it look like? "
-Mitch Hedburg
One time I was in a car with some people, and the clouds looked really nice, and out loud I said "I wonder what kind of clouds those are? Are they like cumulus? I don't even know all the types of clouds" or something along those lines. About a minute later, I take my phone out to look it up and I type "What kind of" and the google auto-fill was "clouds are those" and I was like "There's absolutely no way that my phone is not listening to me at all times. I do not believe for one second that the most popular search is "What kind of clouds are those". That was very very specific to what I had just said out loud.
I'm usually not one for tinfoil hats, but this is very difficult to explain.
Man, I swear I read that the new season started on July 20th somewhere. Imagine my disappointment when I got my drinks, snacks, sweatpants, and mindset ready... Only to find out that it doesn't come out until next week. I don't think I've ever gotten content blueballs before. This was a first.
We'll make our own internet! With blackjack! And hookers!