In the UK a lot of people stubbornly believe the unemployed live lives of luxury*. Not helped by reality TV shows just a decade ago like Benefits Street which showed people on social security living it large.
In reality the vast majority of people want to work.
E.g. 3 years ago I lost 2 jobs in 6 months during their respective probation periods. I'd been employed all my life and helped launch 2 successful companies in my 20s. But suddenly in 6 months my entire world view collapsed after losing two jobs.
Since then I've attempted suicide 4 times. Had 3 psychotic episodes. Self harmed and been convicted of a crime I don't even remember committing.
My probation officer has known me 3 months and is already pressuring me to start work.
Have I had help for my mental health? Have I fuck. Well, except being stuck on antidepressants that don't work. My psychosis has stopped but could start again when I'm under stress (paranoia & hearing voices).
But wait. What caused such a significant spiral? Losing my fucking job - twice!
But I'm being pushed by society and a probation officer to restart work with no mental health support or treatment. I'm being pressured into something that runs the risk of me losing the job and once again spiralling into substance abuse and suicide.
That isn't fair on the company I may eventually end up at or...and I feel guilty for saying it...me.
I feel guilty every fucking day for being on 'benefits'. I've been almost a complete shut in with no friends or family. I'm utterly fucked.
I want to work. I'd actually love to work in an office cos I wanna be around people again even though my options enable WFH. But it runs the risk of killing me via another psychotic break and no one is helping me except a 3 month waiting list for therapy.
Do you are using any antipsychotic and/or mood stabilizer? I'm 90% sure you are bipolar from what you are saying, and from my 27 to 29 I was barely functional in my job and not functional at all in any other area of my life without a mood stabilizer. And my life changed hard after it
Second on the other response about mood stabilizers and bipolar disorder.
Not to internet doctor here, but giving certain antidepressants and other medications to someone who is bipolar sends them into severe mania. That happened to me and I had no idea that anything was really wrong with the drugs they gave me. I didn't even know what mania even meant.
The psychiatrist at the university health center only had a 15 minute conversation and see you in a few months. If I wanted real therapy I had to go somewhere else. So thus I was pretty out of my mind for god knows how many months until I decided to stop taking them. Maybe almost a year? It was all a blur.
Takeaway is to advocate for yourself, take a look at the drugs they are giving you, and keep calling these doctors to tell them what is and isn't working. It is an uphill battle and the system is broken here in the US. I don't want to assume gender here, but I really feel for you if you are a woman and have to deal with sexism in the medical system on top of everything else.
Mental health is hard and it sucks when your life spirals so far out of control all at once. Take the safety net. You got this. I like spending time in cafes, so I can be around people for a while. I always find it kind of relaxing to be there, but not have to interact with anyone if I don't want to. Be kind to yourself, internet stranger.
Life doesn't have to be high stakes, there is only artificial scarcity. We have the resources to take care of everyone on the planet and live in harmony with nature.
We can split the atom, put a super computer in every pocket and build a logistics system to air freight me a bowling ball over night from anywhere to my door if I pay enough.
The stars are ours as a species if we choose, but not this way.
Despite having a degree, which shows that you can do the job, employers still ignore your application, or reject you.
Now, college students have a thing called loans. Whether or not you have a job, those loan providers still want to be paid.
If the student can't pay the loans, and their family cosigned the loans, but they can't pay it, then thats a LOT of pressure from family, and everyone involved is going to have a bad time.
My degree is in game programming. I rolled a nat 1, I guess, cause all the gaming jobs are abruptly disappearing this year, and I just graduated last year. I've given up on pursuing a job for a game company, for now.
I've been in the red a couple times. I'm barely afloat as it is. During December and January, I was thinking about either suicide, or abandoning my life. Going on the road.
But I didn't have the strength to really do it.
I'm at about $130,000 in debt. I am working minimum wage. And entry level for my field is 60-90k.
You can imagine how gutwrenching it might be to be that close to having a liveable income, when you were raised poor, and you've only had minimum wage jobs your whole life. Now I'm back at a minimum wage job, and I have to pay ~$1000 a month in just school loans.
I am not at home to check more into this, but have you looked in the Industrial Automation industry? A lot of game devs ended up being a good fit. While I am hesitant to recommend my old employer, the software guys make good money and I still have a few friends over there. My reasons for quitting had nothing to do with the software department. Check out Dematic and some similar companies. Dematic was at least good for getting experience and I learned plenty.
It may not seem super glamorous at a glance, but it is worth a shot.
Had a very similar experience, even with game dev. You should honestly just avoid game dev jobs but yeah, right now it's impossible to pivot out of game dev anyways. I wish I could say it gets better, and it will, but the game Dev job market will never be good. I graduated 4 years ago and still don't have a job in the field. They want you to be working on personal projects while working 40+ hours a week, probably because they will be working you 60 hours a week, lmao. We picked the worse major, I wish I wasn't scammed into serfdom at 19.
Game dev is extremely hard to break into. I've been in and out of the industry for some time now.
If you're dead set on working in the industry I'd strongly advise going the platform integrations route.
Gain experince working with API services and creating some C++/C# integration wrappers for UE and Unity (GoDot potentially too).
Pick up some contract work doing API development outside the games industry to strengthen your knowledge and experince developing solutions.
Find a game team that needs a platform(s) integration engineering role or a central publishing engineering role.
Develop a host of solutions professionally for a year or two.
Make the jump into the role you actually want.
This also gives you a ton of job flexibility in an industry that values knowledge breadth and has waves of job stability. Automation & tooling engineering, API development, services engineering, etc.
People react to traumatic incidents within their daily lives, well after the trauma has ceased.
Losing a job, your means of survival, is traumatic.
I feel like everyone always puts trauma square within the realms of war and abuse, but trauma comes at all of us, in a multitude of ways.
People who have been recently traumatized need help. People struggling with trauma need continued help. We should help others, so that their trauma does not define them.
That means a strong social safety net, and access to health care, housing, and food. Regardless of who you are, or your circumstance.
You'd be surprised how many homeless people have hard science degrees or previously ran succesful businesses. Bad luck, ill health, medical bills, a family member who needs to be taken care of, (government) corruption, fraud, theft, builders didn't fix your roof right and you're stuck with the bill and negative equity, etc.
It is possible to commit no mistakes and still lose. That is not weakness, that is life.
The idea that hard work will set you free, a slogan that historically featured above many a concentration camp gate, is a comforting lie but a lie none the less.
While that's true, I feel like sometimes people take it to the opposite extreme.
Life isn't just wholly random and you have absolutely no agency in whether you are successful or not.
While it's true there are homeless people who used to be successful or who have advanced degrees, it's a huge minority.
And while you can do "everything right" and still fail, you're wildly more likely to succeed than the person who did "everything wrong."
Is there always a chance of catastrophic failure? Sure. But you do have agency over your life, and can in fact exert heavy influence over your outcomes.
Suicide is never a rational response to a lack of economic opportunity. The story here is that he was sick. The fact that he had trouble finding work maybe was the straw that broke the camel's back, but it seems misleading to imply direct causation between that and suicide.