I went to visit nana in respite care today. The place she is is really nice and the nurses and the others there are lovely. I genuinely think it’s as nice as you can get with these kinds of things. The problem is that nana’s dementia means that she forgets why she’s there. Her short term memory is about 5 minutes long now, and every few minutes she asked me “when do I get to go home?” It broke my heart every time. She doesn’t remember what happened to put her there and she doesn’t understand. When she saw me walk into the common space she jumped up and said “you’ve come to take me home!!” It was all I could do to not cry on the spot. She’s also started reverting to being scared of my grandfather. He’s been dead for 30 years. He was a raging alcoholic and very physically and emotionally violent, but nana also gave out as much as she got back in the day and has never expressed being afraid of him before. But when I kept having to say to her “no Nan, this is your home now, remember? You’re here so that we can keep you safe” she’d just nod and go “right, to keep me safe from him he’s always so angry when he drinks.” So that’s interesting.
Anyway I took her to the pancake parlour and let her go to town and order anything she wanted and she was so stoked. She’s never as happy as she is when she’s got dessert.
I need and entire bottle of wine and a good cry now.
Sad Robot Noises
Heading to Melbourne next week. Taking the Jetstar roulette. Last time the flight was eventually cancelled at midnight and we got put up in a hotel and slept for like 4 hours before having to be up again for the earliest flight the next morning.
Definitely hoping that isn't the case this time.
I reached out to my old primary school a week or so ago about donating my books to the school library since they are the reason I am such a big reader and wanted to be a writer. They said yes and wanted me to come in for a talk but unfortunately couldn't make it work because of pupil free day on one day and specialist classes on the other. They asked if I could come for book week which I would love but probably won't be able too. I'm really sad I couldn't do it because I've really felt a connection to my school since my little one started school and I'm now studying education for a career change.
I'm still going to drop off the books and hopefully get to see what it's like inside. Last time I was in Melbourne I drove past and it's changed so so much. It's crazy.
Finally had my long awaited psychiatrist appointment today and lemme just say I'm so so so relieved she turned out to be very professional and empathetic and asked lots of very very relevant questions and wasn't at any point condescending or patronising. I'm quite emotional tbh. Just want to lie down somewhere and soak up the sun but I have this very time critical government related project thing I have to go and do now and my shoulders are killing me. I will do the lie down this weekend.
Everythings coming up Milhouse. New job is good, exercise and money. Close enough to home and might be really close after training. aa is working. Finally got some closure on my previous shit cunts of employers and co workers, can resign and move on with life. Holiday is over and I have a new job. Also got news my son and mum are coming down for a couple of weeks in August. Got interviewed yesterday for a trans book and photo exhibition. So much positivity going around. Service work today, aa and my organistiion. Cook another vege stew, go for a walk, another meeting and then bed. My days are full of joy at the moment. Plus constantly playing with the cats. They are super happy at the moment. I got some treats from Aldi. They love them a bit too much but it's bringing us closer.
Exciting day trip to Northland. It has real shops, something Carlton and the cbd doesn't have.
I went by bus and that was excitement. 😬 A big speeding earthmoving truck pushed a van into our lane, evasive measures were taken.
Northland is so different to where I live. It has shops for children and men and families, homewares and variety stores, cafes that weren't just coffee shops. It's clean and quiet.
People there wear colours other than black. 😵
Hey, be safe out there guys! The amount of idiotic driving and near misses I witnessed on the way to work was greater than usual for sure.
Oh my GOD. I was gonna post this bit of a rant because I couldn't find my pants. I was so annoyed and getting frustrated. I couldn't find them and I remembered wearing them Monday and put them on my bed. I even checked the laundry places.
...I washed them Monday night so they were in the hamper the whole time. I'm an idiot.
aaah, many swears old workplace resignation letter sent. I was super stressed right after then but and an aa friend called very soon after which was at just the right time. First time I'd wanted to drink in a month. That call, food, an anti anxiety med and some strong camomile tea and I'm deeply at ease again and feel like booze would be a very bad idea. End of an epoch of my life. I worked there for almost 17 years and they've always had shit management which really failed me when I needed their support. I expected a lot more solidarity from the staff also but received absolutley none, not even an are you ok? I'd given mine so freely and to my own detriment as the most senior member of staff. They're all on my resentment list. FUCK THEM! Their memories will fade away as I make better connections and they'll still be spineless psycophants. I deliberately avoid places I may see them because I really don't like my chances of keeping my cool around them. Ok, rant over. No stew made, but I think dinner is planned with some aa people after this evening's meeting. end rant, thanks for reading dear DT friends.
In today's defiant act of self inflicted financial sabotage I'm getting 3 potato cakes @ $2.50 a pop when I go to the shops later. Tum tum can do this.. it has to.
They're newish and it's daylight robbery but they've lengthened their trading hours and are open every day now so seeing that viability warms the icy cockles of my heart.
Good painted sky tonight.
I wish it was the weekend already, I’m sick of work today, my boss is on holidays and someone has decided to change up one of the aspects of my job so that what used to take me about 45 minutes, took me 2 and a half hours today. Hopefully it will be quicker tomorrow, but I keep thinking about the fact that I usually have Fridays off and have to go in just to get frustrated.
I finally got paid, yay! And I sent my partner the money that I owe them from last October. It's a lot of money and goes over the savings budget, but it was only an extra $40 or so, and I'd rather it out of the way than still looming.
Had a couple site servers go offline yesterday, in both cases it's the modems. One's a hard DUP fail (meaning it's the NBNco infrastructure in the pit outside), the other is the modem just straight up offline in the aussie broadband diagnostics. So i have nbnco going out today to repair one abd waiting on site to reboot the modem at the other. Simples, right?
Nope, $boss is already rabbiting on about replacing the servers and trying to light a fire under my arse screaming about random shit that doesn't even goddamn apply once actual diagnostics are run on the issues to hand.
Fucking spectacular
Someone just found and liked a Facebook post I made in 2017. Things really do hang around on the internet!
After much procrastination I took the first step in my plan to make instructional videos by doing a short video of how to darn a sock. I really don't sound like I think I do when recorded, it is very odd. I also put some apps on my phone to filter for colour blindness visibility, it was a bit tricky to find colour combinations that would work well and provide good contrast for different types of colour blindness.
I think I've got the basics down about how to use the editing software, but managed to delete a section in the middle (fortunately not an important bit). I also need to work on keeping what I am doing centred when filming, I kept moving my work into the wrong spot.
Overall, lots of areas to improve on but I'm fairly happy with it for a first effort.
Day 19 of exercise program completed minus the jumping jacks and the mountain climbers due to mysteriously injured foot. Day 4 of tummy exercises also completed. Pain spray liberally applied. Ibuprofen taken. Let's get this bread!
I actually slept a full 8 hours last night, no wake ups. One day in the office and it kills me haha.
Well I've survived the night, Mr Peeler didn't manage to kill me with insufficiently cooked chicken. Foot is still sore but not quite as bad as yesterday. Luckily I've got a mostly sit down job today, making lasagna sheets. I'll take my pain spray with me and hope for the best.
I have now spent way too long learning to do captions for YouTube videos. Then I discovered that the default position for them blocks the video of what I am doing. After much investigation I have discovered that you can drag the subtitles where you want them when you watch, unless you are using the app. Which of coarse automatically opens when you watch a video. I have now disabled the app, as I apparently can't delete it, and now videos are opening in the browser. It is frustrating how many companies put out apps with extremely limited features and then push everything to open in them. If I wanted to use the blasted app I wouldn't be in my browser.
I've just been going year by year on my Google Timeline to see how far I've travelled each year. I know some people find this sort of thing creepy that your phone keeps a record of places you've been, but I find it really useful and valuable.
2020 the furthest place I went to was Albury and that wasn't until December. It's almost as if something happened that year that kept me at home. 2016 the furthest was Sydney but every other year since it has been tracking me (2012 when I moved from iPhone to Android) I've managed to get up to Queensland or travel internationally, so I'm doing alright.
If anyone is taking a look at theirs.. check out August 2020. I actually didn't go beyond our mandated 5km limit the entire month! I went to Costco x 1, Woolworths x 1, Pizza Hut x 1, KFC x 1 and my apartment for the entire rest of the month!
#Worldle #538 1/6 (100%) 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🎉 ⭐⭐🏙️🪙 https://worldle.teuteuf.fr
@Duenan@aussie.zone don't forget to grab some delicious herring today 🐟🐟
Anyone experience the Frankston line disruptions?
PTV website says to go to the Art's Centre to get a bus to Moorabbin, but then I keep getting told by them to take the Sandringham train to Brighton beach and take a bus from there to Moorabbin. That actually adds an extra 15-20 minutes to my travel rather than an express bus to Moorabbin from Art's Centre.
Anyone know why they keep telling us to go Sandringham line instead? Is the Art's Centre bus not actually running?
I came away with this at Aldi today. I’ll go and pick up the kipper tomorrow from Colesworth but I thought I’d give this a shot just because.
Can of Tomato Flavoured Herring from Aldi
It's not stressful driving into the office (in Sydney) during school holidays. Even better if I were WFH. Oh well.
What are your thoughts on what the highways would be like, if we implemented the UK's / Japan's road rule, where you cannot overtake a vehicle in a lane left of it?
It would do a good job of keeping the right lane free, but knowing Aussie drivers, they would just hog the lane.
Tix on sale now for The Dry 2 : Force of Nature with a Q&A with Eric Bana, Director Robert Connolly & author Jane Harper.
