How do you cope with the state of the world today?
How do you cope with the state of the world today?
Everything just seems so out of control. The US seems to be tearing itself apart. The world is on fire. We seem to be going backwards when it comes to freedom and human rights. We've turned our backs on each other. How do you cope with all this without just giving up?
Don't spend all your time reading news, they are purposely negative because it generates more interest and money, don't take everything you read as truth.
99% of these problems won't turn into anything other than a faded memory.
End of the day, nothing you can do will change what's happening half way across the world, so why let it change you?
Focus:
Exactly as Stephen R. Covey pointed-out, in "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families"
https://www.amazon.com/Habits-Effective-Families-Revised-Updated/dp/1250857775/
You have a Circle-of-Concern: all the things you attach your awareness on,
and you also have a Circle-of-Influence: all the things you actually can alter.
Since the bigger your Circle-of-Concern, the LESS life-energy you have for your Circle-of-Influence, therefore you need to deliberately reduce your Circle-of-Concern, in order to expand your Circle-of-influence.
That's it: it's that simple.
Deny awareness-vampire processes your lifeblood.
Own your own self, more, & use that self-owning in order to make your portion of the world more-healthy.
Just because mass-media did all it could to make one boundaryless, helplessly stuck in consuming-trance, bedazzled & led-along like steers the industry is bringing into the abbatoir, doesn't mean that you or I agreed to our lives doing/being only that, does it?
We never agreed.
It is our right to break the "agreement" that our childhoods were signed-into, before we could do any considered-reasoning.
Either we have the guts & gall to do it, or our-lives are consumed by the "machine" that exists only for sake of its own transient profit-sensations.
Owning one's own life is a right.
_ /\ _
I gave up on everyone: I've packed my shit and moved back to the EU, to a middle of nowhere, population 50. Closest neighbor is a 10 minute walk away. Started a large garden, learned some blacksmithing and basic carpentry. Still working remotely for the same company as before, but now when I go outside I have fresh air, I can see the stars and I can hear nobody.
I’m 51, I grew up with media fear mongering of the Cold War, the hole in the ozone layer and AIDS. I don’t think there has ever been a period in my life where there hasn’t been a threat in some form or another, and I sleep like a baby. We aren’t going backwards, it’s just another day at the office.
If you find yourself worrying about events on the other side of the world then you need to switch off the news and focus on what you can control in your own life. Sure, WW3 could be around the corner, Covid 2 Electric Boogaloo could be more lethal or the icebergs could melt, but we can’t do a goddamn thing about it, so what is worrying going to accomplish?
Worry about paying the mortgage, making sure your family are fed, and stay safe.
On average the world is better than it's ever been. Higher life expectancies, less war, better quality of life; it's all generally on the up. Would you rather go back to the last financial crisis? When the ozone layer was being depleted? The interment threat of nuclear annihilation? Race riots? Women not being able to vote? High infant mortality? etc, etc
By helping people nearby.
Part of it is the mantra “out of my control, out of my concern.” Or “not my circus, not my monkeys.” That doesn’t mean I don’t care. It means I do what I can do, and try not to despair about what I can’t change.
How do I cope?
The media sells the idea the world is on fire. By a lot of measures, humanity is the best it's ever been:
Things do seem bad, things do need fixing. My advice is to pick one singular part of the world you want to improve and figure out how to fix it. Something like abolishing prison labor or environmentalism. It needs to be something you can make a noticeable dent in, where you can see your own contribution to the effort.
Don't change tack every time something new like Isreal-Hamas or the scuffle at the US-Mexico border happens. You picked that one thing to fix, remember? And unless you plan on going down to the border with a gun, how do you plan on making a real difference? If you can't make a difference, why let it bother you?
I don't doom scroll.
I read a copy of my local, still-Independent newspaper free every morning with digital access to my library.
I vote in every local, State and Federal election.
I vote Progressive in the Primaries and Democrat in the General.
I say 'Yes' to any/all referendums that Tax the wealthy.
That's about all I can do without financially impacting my family or my career. If it was feasible I'd maybe even start attending my Town Hall meetings just to get a barometer reading on my local Council Members.
Crazy thing is I'm 36yo, and sanity checks have required me to act like a 60yo from the 90s... minus the 'got mine' Boomer attitude.
Don't read/watch news. That's the only advice I can trully gie you since news are made to purposfully make people restless.
Keep in mind that American news is not really news. It's strictly entertainment and you should treat it as such. FOX, MSNBC, CNN are all for profit enterprises and they are completely focused on that and nothing else. That asshole fuck face that owns FOX even admitted it in court under oath.
So instead of informing the public, these entities present "news" in a way that is designed to make you emotionally react, give you a dopamine hit, instead of actually informing you of anything. Are some worse than others? Yes, but all of them do it to some degree or another. I personally believe that the down fall of this country will eventually be tracked to the elimination of equal time laws and the limits of entities owning media outlets. It used to be a single entity could not own more than 11 broadcast stations. Those laws need to come back and it's an absolute emergency that they do.
To sum up the above: You are constantly being manipulated by the media you watch to make you feel that things are a lot worse than they really are, so some asshole somewhere can make more money. Yes, your feeling of things being out of control is only because some fuck face is making money from you feeling that way.
My suggestion is do not watch TV for your news. Read. If you want to learn about American politics, read a foreign newspaper that comes from a country that really doesn't have a lot of skin in American Politics. Better yet, get involved in your local political scene and make yourself a part of the news cycle.
I was listening to a podcast about the scientists responsible of monitoring potentially world threatening asteroid collisions with the earth. They are constantly reminded that the whole world could blink out of existence in an instant. But they continue their job because that’s the part they have control over. I worry of the things I can change. Wether they being small or big and wether my impact is small or big. If I have no control over, I acknowledge it and move on.
I’m trying to enjoy things while they last and appreciate how precious they are, especially nature. Sometimes I wonder whether I should be preparing for the brutal future that is to come, since there is no avoiding famine, draughts, mass migrations and wars that the climate change will cause. But we don’t have enough information about what exactly will happen, and since humans have an unbelievable ability to adapt, it can be left for the future. so the only thing I can do now is create memories and spend time with loved ones so I’m not full of regrets once we lose everything
Weed
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Do what you can. Reduce your carbon footprint by eating less meat, using cars less, flying less. OK, by yourself it's not going to make a huge difference, but at least you will know that personally, you aren't making it worse. Join a group that is trying to make a positive difference.
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Concentrate on the little things that make you happy. You can't stop climate change on your own but you can make something nice for dinner.
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Value your friends and keep in touch with them. They probably feel pretty much the same as you do. Cheer each other up and support each other.
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Get a hobby to keep yourself occupied.
That's all I can think of.
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By dedicating a certain amount of time for things I enjoy while pretending that the world outside doesn't exist. That time when I watch an anime, or read a book, or write fanfiction, or cook something delicious... that keeps me sane, it keeps me from falling back on my natural tendency to focus on all the bad things and ignore the good in the world.
You cannot allow yourself to be in that "constant stress" because it wears you down and grinds your sanity and willpower like a big belt sander.
That timeout revitalises me, and gives me the balance to deal with the stresses and worries about everything else.
Obviously there isn't a silver bullet, and mindfulness is probably the best bet here.
I started therapy a year ago.
I enjoy walking my dog (usually) and sitting with my cat.
I spend way, way more time exercising than is normal or mentally healthy probably, but it's been my coping mechanism for years and I leaned into it.
I try to invite friends over when people have time. It's not often. I'm that age where people are starting to get married and have kids and move away.
I'm miserable most of the time. I try to ignore the shitty politics, the news, the cost of housing, the cost of food, the quicksand it feels like we are all slowly sinking into.
I've decided I'm never having kids. They don't deserve to be forced to exist in this.
The only consolation I've found is an answer to a similar post to this on Reddit a couple years ago - someone in their 60s or so was explaining that for what it's worth, the world is always on fire if you only focus on that part. They grew up in the cold war, doing bomb shelter drills and hearing how they were going to get nuked by Russia. The economy has its issues then. The government has its issues then. I think those issues are worse now, but honestly who knows. You have to look for moments of brightness and try to avoid focusing on the morass of terribleness that everyone is trying to shove down your throat. It's not easy. But the alternative is worse.
Like this:
Honestly I dissociate, focus on myself and people I love, the world is a lost cause - probably won't have kids
Accepting this is what my species is like and that this is the world we've made for ourselves, is the hard bit.
The good bit is that it will be over soon.The rest is depression.
I just don't read news and I try to focus on my own life instead. Try to put social media to minimum/
Best advice I have is to reach out in your local community to help where you can.
Doesn't matter if it's a municipal food bank, a church running a shelter, a charity helping battered spouses, or some kind of a mutual aid group getting people caught up on the bills... just working with others to help fix what you can does an amazing amount for your mental health. Volunteer to help shelter and feed migrants or the homeless. There's after school programs for kids in single parent households or who's parents have to work too much to be there for them. Cities across the US have citizens councils where local problems are brought and attempts to solve them are made.
I know it all sounds cliche and it's all a bandaid on the bigger picture's problems but, in terms of your own mental health it can do wonders... plus I guarantee groups local to you need an extra set of hands on a regular basis. When bad things are going around, we start to worry... when the bad things are enormous and out of any semblance of our control we think we can do nothing. That's not true, you can do something, just on a local or regional scale. Reach out and offer to help in any way you can.
I love it when the next post on my feed fits perfectly
How do you cope with all this without just giving up?
By making it personal.
No but seriously, in my country (Germoney) a terrible plan of the far-right fucknuggets got revealed and the people are taking it to the streets in response. During this week, I activated quite a number of co-workers to BE there this weekend. You can change people, you can change them with respect, words and your deeds. I'm a firm believer of "do good and talk about it". The process is a bit grindy though, ngl ;)Giving up isn't so bad, but for myself I limit how much social media and news I consume and do my best to plan life ahead for any upcoming tragedies when I do get my periodic doses.
Not much we can do about the truly terrible things happening, but we can make existence a little less shitty around ourselves.
You and I are not the center of the universe, it's okay to just exist.
That's the neat part, I don't.
It's perfectly fine to withdraw a bit from the angrier politics, news and doomscrolling, even more so if you're noticing that it's actively bringing you down. It's an easy pattern to fall into. Turns out fear, annoyance, distrust and anger are pretty engaging. They are also extremely easy buttons to push for fun, political power, and, above all, profit.
We weren't built to deal with every one of a zillion things wrong with the world every hour of every day. Still, that is what happens when a combination of blind machine learning optimization (for profit, of course), sensationalist greed, and some rando's political opinions decides what you see. In the long history of the human race, borrowing more and fresher worries from all over the world has never been the norm.
I tend to go out of my way to eliminate politics from my life, aside from voting, pretty much. By all means stay informed enough to do what little you can as a random individual, but you can do that without wallowing in every fecal particle of political drama.
Constant masturbation, binge watching TV shows and marijuana.
How do I cope??? I don't read the fucking news or political posts. The world is damn good.
Unlike most, I don't believe its possible (or even a very good idea) to ignore the news. What I do is limit my news source to two places a day, BBC and The Guardian which I know are not perfect but I believe they can be largely trusted. Other than that, I read the odd link on here but I won't doom scroll.
I also do things that have a tangible effect for people who have it worse than me. Hands on in my immediate locality, and via donation nationally and/or internationally. I have a list of charities that I support and donate to two for 6 months then switch to another two and repeat. Doing this means that most importantly, people are helped in some small way and less importantly it offsets the shitness of life a bit. If I can feel a bit happy that I'm doing something, that's a good thing.
Well, I like to remind myself that the only constant in the world is change, and that mostly, we aren't watching the world crumble, we're watching it change.
And I recognize that change is hard and that it's mostly an unpleasant process. But I also know that in aggregate, the change we've seen throughout history has been far more positive than negative by almost every metric. For example, I live every day knowing that an infection is not going to kill me, I couldn't have said that 100 years ago. As a person of color, I enjoy the amount of freedom I have, I certainly wouldn't have had that in the US 250 years ago. If you look back further, I enjoy more luxuries today than an emperor could have 1000 years ago (hell, I can eat strawberries in the winter).
The point I'm making is that in general the world is on a positive trajectory, and has been (for the most part) for all of recorded history. If you consider the context, things aren't really all that bad right now, and history suggests they'll get better.
I compartmentalize. Focus on things at a smaller scale, and work through them one by one. Try not to distract yourself too much on the things that are out of your control. Prioritize the ones that you can actually control. Then identify the short term and long term ones and further prioritize based on that.
Going solarpunk
Ingenuity: The helicopter drone that flew on Mars for the last 2.5 years when it was expected to fly just a few times. It is the embodiment of human achievement. Of our minds in this great unknown. I get so wrapped up in politics and war and social issues, then if I think of Ingenuity it scales all these issues down and makes me feel like a fool for that last period of time I’ve been lost. Science and engineering to further the incredible human story of understanding is everything and that is how I am able to reset where we are in this and where we can go.
I just accept that life is absurd. Once you accept that morality, your own desires, logic, all of them are like waves through time, coming and going, changing form, never staying still...you recognize how ridiculous it is to desperately cling to any semblence of a ground beneath you. Just let yourself fall into the unknown, and at least the insignificance of your own struggle against the tides of change is acknowledged.
Or you can, y'know, just scream, cry, and rage about it. I think of emotions like a buffet. You gotta try them all at least once, and often in a wide variety of combinations. But hey, you do you.
Newspaper scene from Roxanne: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hW5EiGwi_a8
I stopped worrying after the hamas terrorists attack in Israel. Not because I don’t care and think this is horrible and all people should live in peace. But because it is too much information I can handle. All the media is full of wars and crisis but I don’t think there are more or less crisis then 20 years ago for example. The thing is we are so exposed with social media and news websites and stuff. I can’t even surf YouTube without getting actual news about what’s going on. Sometimes I just want to watch dumb or nerdy stuff or read some which is not related to bad things. Some say this is selfish or ignorant - well I still get enough news from the wars in Ukraine and Gaza - I just stopped reading and watching all the stuff I stumble across. I cannot even change much on the situation so it is kinda human to get used to stuff like that. I cannot even Imagine what it was like to live during the Cold War with permanent threat of getting nuked and stuff.
Try to limit how much news/social media I consume, especially the really dark stuff. Then I spend a lot of time finding good things that I love watching (cute animals, reno videos ect). It's a lot of self-preservation because a ton of news is super depressing and rage inducing, keeping a balance between not being totally ignorant but not wanting to ruin my mental health is key
I learn why and how it has happened before
If you prefer audio
You are nearly powerless as an individual yes, but you still have some influence on the world around you. Using it alone at your own whims maybe you can affect the people closest to you and make their lives better but as a collective you can expand that sphere of influence to a vast extent, even globally.
Western society is designed to isolate you, it's a sprawling expanse of concrete with no where for you to go that doesn't cost money. We primarily live in single family homes and that is often legally required due to our districting. we wake up, we go to work surrounded by people we often don't actually connect with because deep down we still know they are our competition, maybe we go out and spend time with what friends we might have retained this far if it's a weekend and we aren't too exhausted, maybe we stay inside and busy ourselves with some hobby or mindlessly consume some media, then we do it again. Over and over and over and over.
How are you meant to organize if you barely even know anyone outside a small friend group? If you don't have a car? If you're exhausted from rediculous work hours and broke from shitty pay? You certainly won't organize if you're pumped full of the most dopamine rich meaningless slop corporate can come up with. Not if there is no sense of community where you live because existing outside cost money and everyone is so far away you don't even know who your neighbors are.
But you do it anyway. Because the struggle is not meaningless, because you wouldn't want them to look the other way when you're left to rot, because you want change.
It's normal to feel overwhelmed by the horrors of the world when you have no one to lean on and you don't have any idea of how you might help. You are meant to feel that way because the more powerless you feel the easier you are to exploit
Quit reading the news and enjoy hobbies.
To be clear I hate religion but wisdom is where you find it.
The world Sidrattha (the Buddha) lived in is more horrible than anyone alive can imagine, except maybe North Koreans. In a culture where you were legally allowed to beat an untouchable they let their shadow pass on you, in a culture where the penalty for a slave caught praying was to have their tongue ripped out. In this world he taught a message of the inherit goodness and inner strength of humanity. His last spoken words were to remind people that no one needed him and they should work on themselves with diligence.
Now if he could see our potential in that hellscape I think we can manage to see it. And no I don't think you or anyone else should become a Buddhist.
Looking at pictures of saiga antelopes
Giant Meteor 2024
For me, personally: Shit's always been out of control, and even though it may seem like human rights are going backwards, we're better off now than we've ever been. Interacting with my own kids and the college students I work with gives me a lot of hope. We really just need the boomers to stop getting nostalgic for the "good old days" when you were allowed to bully anyone who was different from you.
The kids are progress. Support them! Let them turn the world into what they what it to be, and not what we think they need.
Dark humor on lemmy and 10 hours of video games a day
Focus my attention on things I enjoy. Lemmy. Nintendo. Sports.
I can’t control what’s going on “out there”. When I fixate on it I become a mess.
Also, trying to build a backup plan to move out of U.S. to Canada.
Never look, read or listen to the news in the morning. This has brought much calm to my days.
I just try to pay bills man
As EU citizen I tend to:
- Read the news from several newspapers and the independed public broadcasting/news service. (Get multiple views and explanations)
- Hope that US isn't dumb enough to let a criminal become president again.
- Hope that the world won't explode before I die.
- Hope that the country won't flood before I die. (House is 4m below current see level)
- Try to help the best I can with my knowledge.
- Hope for the best, prepare for the worst.
Live in Australia, its great
Meditation (as in, observing your thoughts without judgement, allowing them space, cultivating awareness and compassion). You don't have to sit and focus on a candle or image or get the right breathing techniques or follow any kind of religion. Pema Chodron's books are a very accessible and easy to read, and you don't need to be a Buddhist to follow her work.
Look for spiritual sustenance in nature and in compassionate people. I find a lot of reassuring and helpful approaches in Jiddu Krishnamurti's works, particularly his understanding that cultivating awareness and honest, open observation will increase compassion in yourself and will spread compassion in the world. (It's more nuanced than that, but that's an element of his observations). People with something genuinely helpful to say are not selling you anything - neither an idea or a product.
The news is there to sell things - ideas and products. Most news sources are selling a political and/or religious idea and bias as well as literally advertising products. News media is a business, making money from advertising. They don't make money from selling ideas that life can be satisfying or enjoyable without buying stuff or doing things that make politicians and religious leaders more rich or powerful. Always read the news with a critical eye and look at what isn't being focused on, not what is. Search for interesting personal stories, not headlines to get a slightly better perspective on the world.
There was a study done a few years ago that found that 60% of social media accounts were fake. That number is probably higher now, and there is more AI, too. The news and media and even federated systems are all manipulated in various ways. Huge congregations of right wing end-times Christians work like bot farms to spread fear and misinformation across all platforms: their goal is to speed up destruction because they believe in an afterlife that is only possible if the unbelievers are destroyed. They spread so much fear around feminism, LGBTQ+ issues, trans debates, flat earth nonsense, climate change denial, pro and anti vaccine arguments, etc. They just use whatever works to stir people up; they will take either side of an argument. The Taliban and Al-Queada worked in the same way, to similar ends. Israel and Russia and China all use these manipulation tactics too, to slightly different ends. The UK and Europe have other methods and goals (destroy threats to capitalism and neo colonialism, be seen as good guys). There are bot farms, hackers and paid accounts for every type of greedy power addict. But they all want destruction of perceived rivals, and they want one group of people to be afraid of another. It's all lies and manipulation - some of it works, in a way, but a lot of it doesn't. The fact they are all using these tactics show how desperate and afraid they are. We need to remember just how manipulated news stories and media are, and how the governments and organisations of the world are all trying to fool each other's populations. Before the internet, you only saw your own country's propaganda - now you see it all, and the system is falling apart in front of our eyes.
The news is not the sum total of things that are happening; it's what is making someone more money or more power. The news doesn't report all the people who had a pleasant day, or did a little bit better than yesterday - but how can it? Remember that for every horror story in the news, a thousand times more people were doing OK or better.
Do something that brings you actual joy every day. If you are honest with yourself, you find that actual joy is always the simple things - a favourite food, bouncing a ball, sitting under a tree, reading a good story, caring for a pet, holding hands quietly with a loved one, watching the clouds, riding a bike in nature, making music and art, reading a comic... Whatever small joys you can find, do them every day if you can, even if you're living in a war zone. The small joys are reality, and sometimes you'll experience big joys, although you don't need them so often. News and depressive thoughts are not reality, only skewed and biased ways of looking at parts of reality. Moments of small joy are often all of reality that really matters.
Meditation (in whatever form works for you) can help you to experience the sensation that you are not your thoughts. "You" are something that exists with or without thoughts. It is not enough to consider this idea, it is something you need to actually experience, as often as possible. By extension, the world is not the collective thoughts and opinions of people: there is a reality of existence beyond all the nonsense we project on top of it.
Look for humour and go back to things that help you remember that there is always a lot to laugh about in world. Try to avoid cruel, mocking humour and yet be open to finding life-affirming humour even amongst the worst tragedies.
Cultivate compassion for yourself and the world around you. Ultimately aim to do everything out of compassion - not obsession or selfishness, fear or greed. If you need to be alone, be compassionate for yourself and others that need to be alone; if you need to be with other people, be compassionate for them. Don't look for things in return: it is not a transaction. Compassionate action will not only bring you joy and peace, they will spread it. Practice compassion for everything - plants, animals, yourself, and other people. True compassion is not draining or tiring; it is a letting go of things like prejudice and judgement. It is not easy to do, it is something to work at.
Have positive, achievable goals and work on them whenever you can. You will get setbacks; it's OK. Life shouldn't be lived on a flat surface, there should ups and downs. It's a journey, and a true journey should be interesting, across a changing landscape. When you have downs, recognise that there will necessarily be an up before long. The same us true for people around you, and the world.
Work on things you can change for the better, don't focus on what you can't. But actually work on the things you can change. It doesn't matter how small they are; in many ways, the universe is not interested in big or small; and small things can make big changes anyway, like atoms or bacteria or blood cells (which can all do equally good or bad things, from our human perspective).
There are injustices and tragedies and traumas happening around the world; there are as many beautiful, loving kind things happening at the same time, probably more. The internet, the TV, the newspapers, magazines, books and media are just very small windows for an infinitely large world. We often think we're seeing everything, but we are seeing very little. Our only reality is when we are not looking at life through these small windows - but we spend so much time looking through them that we forget reality. Do things that take you back to reality. If that reality is painful, approach it with compassion and it will gradually get less painful.
Work in reducing suffering in all forms for yourself and everything around you. Don't contribute to suffering and don't dwell on guilt and fear. Acknowledge those experiences, but let them pass. Don't push bad things away, but don't give them energy - just observe them, and return to things that create joy and peace, no matter how small. You don't have to fix things or cure things that are bad, just work on making them a little bit better.
Remember that a lot of bad news is only a matter of perspective. So much of what we hear about - wars, corruption, illness, oppression, greed - are clear signs that the perpetrators of those things are desperate. Desperate people feel as though they are losing; they are doing everything they can to hold on to power, and they are lashing out. But they are losing the fight (most of which is with themselves or each other). Yes, we are the victims of their lashing out, but their viciousness and fear-mongering is because they are losing. They are losing because they have lost compassion and kindness and love. If we don't cultivate those things, we will join them in desperation and fear; if we do continue to cultivate those things, they can never defeat us, because we are not even trying to win or to fight. We are surviving and growing and living. They can hurt us, but they can't defeat us, and when they hurt us, they hurt themselves. But when we try to hurt them, we hurt ourselves, too. We end the fight by inviting them (the desperate, the rich, the powerful) to join us in compassion and kindness, by turning away from suffering and from causing suffering. There is no action too small to help make the world a better place.
Thank you for coming to my Wendy's Ted Talk.