Risa @startrek.website ozoned @lemmy.world 11mo ago

Have you been injured? Call Gowron Law.

11 comments

I was framed for assassinating a politician and sent to Rura Penthe. Gowron got me $5,000!
- $5,000
  
  Surely you mean 5000 slips gold-pressed latinum?
  
  It's an extraordinary example of Hodgkin's Law of parallel planetary development that the Ferengi symbol for "bars of gold pressed latinum" is also the ancient Earth dollar sign.
- sent to Rura Penthe
  
  I have good news and bad news for you.
  
  The good news is: Since you now live at Rura Penthe, Gowron Law can represent you for your new Mesothelioma suit.
If you have been wrongly executed, please call 1-800-555-GOWRON
My ex filled the holodeck with Tribbles, leading to severe injuries of a sensitive nature by both holodeck malfunctions and the Tribbles.

An evil Lincoln was involved, though. Do I still have a case?
- Do I still have a case?
  
  We actually have a class action suit for that very thing. Let me DM you the details.
Gowron was killed while he was still chancellor. They're just using his image for advertising purposes, but you'll never get to meet him, and he won't go to court with/for you.

Ch'Pok had a more modest practice, but he'll represent you personally.
My father was once falsely accused of being a bak'targ. Calling Gowron Law helped restore honour to my house. 35/9 great service.
Transporter buffer imprisonment

This is a horrifying concept and you bet I would send a Klingon law team after someone for that.

Console explosion

Do they have experience/success with suing The Federation? I heard they recently added Borg parts to all their ships - seems reckless to me.

11 comments