Yeah, girls do seem to like it when you demonstrate how much you care. Just have to get your foot in the door first, with dates and small talk and jokes and stuff, so it grows naturally. Otherwise, especially if there's anxiety at play, it can feel creepily artificial and accelerated. Those are not attractive.
That's where romcoms mess up, the shorter movie runtime means they have to skip the legwork that would be necessary irl before reasonably showing feelings that strong.
Let's be honest though, guys been pulling dumb stunts for girls they really like (and vice versa too) for a very long time. That's real life, which romcoms are taking inspiration from. They just cut out all the dull parts and exaggerate the rest for comedy purposes.
But they play into the idea that it's the norm, or the expected even, and other movies draw inspiration from its ideals further solidifying the concept of unrestrained woo.
The couple in this situation are lucky it worked out, but generally what happened here would be a big overstepping of boundaries. Media heavily encourages guys to do these big moves and big gestures, but very often these big moves are written without respecting boundaries, without checking in and without worrying about consent. Actually - it's often written as if not checking for consent are what makes these big moves great.
That's fiction. That is NOT real life. It looks nice on film, but in real life, more often than not, it's disrespectful and uncomfortable. There's lots of ways to show you care, and the most fundamental one is checking in, asking for consent, asking about boundaries and comfort levels.
This couple is lucky that it worked out without serious boundaries being crossed without those conversations. But I want to stress - that's luck. Check in
Yes, you're right, it is luck. Previous generations believed luck was an important element in deciding who got to be successful or not in life. We generally disagree with that position, which is why we talk about doing things differently.
To pretend that this the fault of media exclusively just teaching bad practices vs the media simply parroting our own silly, hormone-driven behaviors back at us, is pretty ridiculous imo.
Stunts are not always large, sometimes they are small. What makes them stunts is they're dumb, though, because the hormones and genitalia are driving your brain, not the rational logic centers anymore. Trust me though, the feeling of being in love makes "sense" go largely out the window. It's a more powerful rush than any drug, imagining that rationality can just casually put it in check is frankly, absurd.
Really, fall madly, head over heels for someone. Let me know how rational and logical it makes you.
This is why Nora Ephron is the GOAT. she always puts time jumps in the story so you can see the characters grow over time.
There’s gotta be trust and good intentions. For example. If you think your unrequested 8 hour drive now means you deserve sex, we sense it and we are generally not a fan.
guys been pulling dumb stunts for girls they really like (and vice versa too) for a very long time. That’s real life, which romcoms are taking inspiration
How many stories about some warrior has to complete a quest to get the girl. Like Chulainn.
Yeah, Norway's first unification apparently happened because some small king wanted a girl and needed to impress her.
depressing that people have to drive 8 hours to visit others, should be a 5 hour train at least
Laughs in Canadian.
My longest single day non-stop drive was around 18 hours.... Never even left the province. The flight alternative required me chartering my own plane and would have cost many many thousands of dollars more, so I went with driving as it was the cheapest option.
Took me 13 hours to drive from Vancouver to Canmore Alberta, 13 hours to drive from Canmore to Kenora Ontario, 13 hours to drive from Kenora to Saults Saint Marie, and 7 more to get to Toronto.
Managed to cut it down to 18 hours straight to get the hell out of Ontario.
Sure, we'll just delete some of the land in North America so everyone can live closer together.
Depending on the familiarity. Everyone is different.
Imagine if you went on a date with a person. You think they're neat. And maybe will give them a second chance.
Suddenly, they show up outside of your family's house.
Context and nuance. Just about everything in life comes down to context and nuance.
And I guess she was really into him since otherwise this would be fucked
When the dry spell beats out the red flags.
That's pretty dedicated just to get laid again.
Sometimes it do be that good.
For the criminally insane.
Alright but when I do it I get a restraining order on me
rules 1 and 2, pal. Depending on how close you are to following them, your results will vary lol
Image Transcription: Twitter
Jessica Ellis @baddestmamajama
11 years ago, I was texting a dude I'd hooked up with a few times as I got ready for thanksgiving back in my hometown. "I forget, what's your town called again?" He asked. I told him. One EIGHT HOUR DRIVE later he appeared at my doorstep. WHAT A DUMBASS.
Anyway we're married.
