My IRL friend group I dm'd drifted apart recently cause of life stuff and I've been wanting to get a new group going. I'm so unsure about online recruiting though. I just don't trust that I'll get anyone I want to play with.
0 - Don't expect to get an awesome group on the first try, may take a while as you gather up people you want to play with.
1 - Look for communities, especially if they run shorter or west marches style games. Not necessarily join with the intent to run games, but play. Get to know folks and then extend invites to them for game.
2 - Run a few shorter games of limited length. 3-5 session long I find to be awesome to get something done. Some may be awful but you only have to stand them for a few games.
3 - Questionnaire where you discreetly bring up your red flags and feel the waters around them. For example I always mention that safety tools will be used and if they want a specific tool used I'll happily do that for them. If I get replies they don't need safety tools or disparage them in some way that would for me be a red flag.
4 - Don't be afraid to disband groups or kick out folks. It is not a failure.
Those are some good tips, I appreciate it. It seems like joining some groups as a player might not be a bad idea, and doing a short campaign sounds smart too.
For me the main things I'm looking for are people who want to do cooperative immersive story telling, rather than meta gaming, murder hoboing, or being really goofy and ridiculous. My games are fun and we laugh plenty, but I want people to take the roleplay seriously and try to immerse themselves in the setting. The game is just there as a tool to help tell good stories together.
And then you start DMing, even as a beginner who has no idea what he's doing you get 6-8 players at the table, that party size is unsupported by the balancing tools given by WotC so you wrack your brain trying to come up with challenging encounters for the whole group, burn out, stop DMing, and the imbalance worsens even further.
This was my motivation behind allowing more players in the first place. My previous group basically fell apart because I had 3 players and when one of them canceled last minute - which was basically all sessions - there weren't enough players for a session. When one of those players dropped out permanently, I went online to look for more players, and I figured: "Hey, if I have 6 players with the same flake ratio then I'll have a 4-person party most of the time. Let's do this!"
But then the fuckers started showing up consistently for every session!
And even though I'm a noob (well, not so much since I've been DMing for a year now, 7 months of this for this large weekly group... but I still have no idea what I'm doing) I still have to make some new applicants take a number. Which just underlines how much of a DM/player imbalance there is.
(I'm planning to split the group based on player experience level into two biweekly campaigns of 5 players, that way I might be able to allow a couple of newer players to join and still preserve what was left of my sanity.)
Just put your foot down and refuse to add more than 5 players until you're experienced enough. (*sigh* I wish I had followed my own advice.) Sure, CR started with 7 regular players and sometimes they have even bigger parties with guest players... but that's Matt Mercer, he knows what he's doing, and the players are also good enough to avoid making it a nightmare for him and each other. You as a noob DM will have your hands full with herding 4-5 overly excitable cats and managing the rest of the game.